The captain has turned on the no smoking sign.
Please extinguish all smoking materials.
Make sure your seats are in the upright position
and your seat belts fastened in preparation for our arrival
at Los Angeles international airport.
Ok, this way. Bye- bye, now.
Bye- bye.
Bye. Thank you.
Take care.
Watch your step there.
Ok. Bye- -
good- bye.
Good- bye.
Bye- bye.
Mrs. Georgia Ricard. Mrs. Georgia Ricard.
Please come to the information counter
for a message.
Uh!
Uh! Uh! Uh!
Aah!
No!
[Sobbing]
I'm so glad to see you!
Ha ha ha!
Ahem.
Flight 709,
Leaving for Hawaii.
Flight 709, leaving for Hawaii.
Just a moment please, sir.
Yes, sir.
If you'd come with me, please.
What is this all about?
We'll explain in due time. Just follow me.
You've made some kind of mistake.
We can clear this up in no time, if you'll just follow me, sir.
My superiors just want to talk to you, sir.
I hope there's an explanation.
There's no reason why you should- -
this way, sir, please.
In the toilet?
Listen, I demand an explanation!
How about this? Hmm?
Oh, my god!
You find me attractive?
You're not a cop!
They wouldn't take me!
Excuse me, I have to run.
Why?
Don't run away from your feelings! Where are you going?
Don't be so gauche.
We're all doing it.
What a dramatic airport!
Dr. Ricard H. Thorndyke?
Yes.
Hold it.
Who are you?
Brophy. I work at the institute.
I'll be your driver and sidekick.
Oh. How do you do?
Why the picture- taking?
I love to take pictures. I'm very photogenic.
I develop them. I have my own darkroom.
Please hold the camera. I'll get the trunk.
Oh, thank you.
Ungh!
I got it.
I ain't got it.
I'll get it.
I got it.
Ungh! I ain't got it.
I got it.
I got it!
I ain't got it.
Ungh!
Where's the car?
Over there, doc.
Would you mind opening the trunk?
I'll save us a little time.
Ok, doc.
You got it. You got it.
Here we go.
Ungh!
I'm glad you're heading the asylum.
We haven't had a real chief
since Dr. Ashley died.
I hope I do as good a job as Ashley did.
He was a brilliant psychiatric innovator.
Yeah. Innovator. Innovator.
When your takeover was announced,
Dr. Montague blew his top.
Between me, you, and the steering wheel,
Montague figured he had the job in his back pocket,
if you get my drift.
Hmm. Is that so?
Then they go and get you,
a professor from Harvard University.
No offense.
None taken.
It was a shock to everybody when Ashley died.
The guy was in tiptop shape.
Well...
One can't predict a heart attack.
Heart attack- - ha!
Don't make me laugh.
Brophy, what are you saying?
If you ask me,
Dr. Ashley was a victim
of foul play.
[Symphonic music playing]
~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~
whew!
Your imagination is getting the best of you.
Let's not forget,
you work in a psychiatric institution,
which is conducive to fantasy.
Well, maybe I'm wrong, maybe I'm wrong.
Hey... I know I'm right.
[Buzz]
Brophy here with the new head shrink.
Mmm.
Well, doc, here's your new home.
Dr. Thorndyke, I am simply delighted
to meet you in person.
I've read everything you've written on psychiatry- -
your lectures, your monographs, books.
I'm absolutely thrilled you're taking over the institute.
Well, thank you, um, um- -
Dr. Philip Wentworth.
Philip Wentworth, a pleasure.
I've been here two years.
I know things will change for the better
now that you're here.
Ever since Dr. Ashley died,
strange things have been happening.
Wentworth!
Ah!
The eminent Dr. Thorndyke.
It's a great day here at the institute for the very, very nervous.
We've been looking forward to your arrival.
I am Dr. Charles Montague.
I was in charge here until you showed up.
Ahem!
Oh.
Allow me to introduce nurse Diesel,
my right- hand man. Woman.
Dr. Throndyke? How do you do?
Charlotte Diesel. I've left a complete medical file
of everyone in the institute in your room.
I'm sure you'll want to rest a bit and freshen up
before you meet the staff.
Dinner's served promptly at 8:00 in the private dining room.
Those who are tardy do not get fruit cup.
Excuse me.
Well, Dr. Thorndyke, may I say- -
Charles!
Good- bye.
See? What I'm trying to tell you- -
Wentworth!
Good- bye.
I got it. I got it.
I got it.
I ain't got it.
[Knock on door]
come in.
Thorndyke. My Ricard!
Professor little- old- man!
Lilloman. Lilloman.
Nobody gets it right.
"Little- old- man. Little- old- man. "
Ricard! Ricard!
Ohh! Ricard!
Ah! My best pupil!
My best student which I ever had!
A patient comes to you,
he is suffering from belldon's hysteria.
He has a seizure. What do you give him?
Two ccs of aqueous thorazine and somadiozine.
Good. Good. Good.
And the most important thing?
Never take a personal check.
Ja! That's my boy!
That's my good pupil!
It's so good to see you.
Please sit down.
Oh, Ricard, Ricard, I am so proud of you,
so proud, my boy.
Ah, head of your class at johns hopkins,
associate professor at dartmouth,
full professor at harvard,
winner of the nobel prize,
and now the head of the most prestigious psychiatric institute
on the west coast.
[Sobbing]
I'm sorry, excuse me.
When you get old, you get very emotional.
Oops! I blew too fast.
Here, professor. Here are some tissues.
Oh, danke schoen.
Professor?
Yeah?
I had no idea you were working here!
Working? Well...
Working? Ha ha ha!
Working is a big word.
I'm a consultant.
Ha ha ha!
It's a fancy title for a part- time job.
I come in two hours a day.
I don't bother them. They don't bother me.
Your predecessor, Dr. Ashley, hired me.
It is a shame he died so all of a sudden.
He was going to make some very big changes around here,
and then... Poof!
Hmm.
Did you see your view outside?
Oh, it is spectacular!
I, uh... I've been meaning to,
but I have been so busy unpacking,
i haven't had a chance.
You will unpack another time.
Come, Ricard. I insist. Come and see right now!
Well, if you insist.
Come! Come, Ricard.
This will be a treat for you.
Is this not the perfect time of the day?
Very nice.
Come over here. You can see better.
Beautiful.
Come to the edge, and you can look down.
Aaaaaaaah!
Ohh! Ohh!
Ricard!
Ricard, oh!
Aah! Aah!
Oh, my boy! You all right?
Easy! Easy! Come back inside.
Oh, my goodness!
Have a seat.
Goodness!
Thank you, professor.
I don't know what came over me.
I know what came over you. High anxiety.
You still got it.
It's probably the excitement and tension
of taking over this new post.
I'm sure it'll pass.
Bullshit!
These things do not let go.
High anxiety can be a very dangerous enemy.
If left unchecked, it could cost you your life!
[Musical sting]
tomorrow.
First thing tomorrow,
we have our first session of psychoanalysis.
I have not had you on the couch for a long time.
I promise, we will beat this thing.
Good- bye.
But, professor, is it really nece- -
it is nece. I know what is nece.
Don't tell me what's nece.
I tell you what's nece.
[Door slams]
[crickets chirping]
[conversation]
do you agree with that?
I do.
[Crash!]
Uh, yes, uh, ahem.
As I was saying, it came to my attention
that just before Dr. Ashley's untimely death,
he was planning to make some very big changes
here at the institute.
Do any of you know specifically what those changes might be?
Well, for one thing, he wanted to change- -
the drapes.
The drapes?
The drapes.
He wanted to change the drapes
in the psychotic game room.
That was the extent of the big change,
the... Drapes?
Oh, yes. Dr. Ashley felt that color
has a great deal to do with the well- being
of the emotionally disturbed.
To some extent that is true, i imagine.
[Ring ring ring]
I'm only 30 seconds late.
You're so strict.
[Slurping]
gentlemen.
And nurse Diesel.
May I propose a toast?
To our new leader, Dr. Ricard H. Thorndyke.
Long may he reign!
I thank you.
Mmm. Yes, that's an excellent brandy.
You can tell just by sniffing the aroma.
Mmm. It's much better than the brandy we used to have.
Dr. Montague, I'm curious.
What exactly is the rate
of patient recovery
here at the institute?
Rate of patient recovery?
I'll have that for you in a moment.
Once in a blue moon.
Hmm.
Dr. Thorndyke,
unfortunately, the rate of recovery in the classroom
is much higher than it is in real life.
We're dealing with sick people here.
You understand?
Dangerously sick people!
Ungh! Ungh!
Ungh!
Ungh! Ungh!
Oh, uh, Dr. Thorndyke?
Will you be attending
the annual psychiatric convention
in San Francisco next week?
Oh, yes, yes!
Ungh!
I think someone should attend, don't you?
I'd be delighted to have the honor.
I'm sure you'll have a nice time.
Oh, thank you.
Up and down.
Side, side, side,
in and out. In and out.
Side, side, side.
Up and down.
Side, side, side.
In and out.
Side, side, side, side, side.
[Gargling]
[crash!]
[Spit's]
oh, my god!
Ugh! Ungh!
"Welcome.
The violent ward. "
Doc?
Is everything all right?
Somebody threw an enormous rock through my window.
Jeez!
A guy like that should be put away.
Look at the size of this thing! Let me get rid of it.
I got it! I got it!
I got it!
Brophy, get it tomorrow.
Yeah.
Aaaahhh!
What was that?
I don't know. I don't know.
Come on.
Aaaahhh!
It's coming from nurse Diesel's room!
Is everything all right in there?
Nurse Diesel?
Are you all right?
Yes?
We heard some weird noises, and we were worried.
Weird noises?
It was the tv.
Sorry it disturbed you.
I've turned it down.
Is there anything else?
It's rather late.
Uh, no. We were concerned.
Good night.
The tv. Well, you could have fooled me.
Yeah, yeah, the tv. It was probably the tv.
Good night.
That was no tv.
Who was it?
It was Thorndyke.
You're making too much noise.
I can't help it. You're hurting me.
- You're going too hard tonight. - Oh, get off it.
I know you better than you know yourself.
You live for bondage and discipline!
Aah!
Too much bondage. Not enough discipline.
You want discipline, I'll give you discipline.
Aah! Aah!
Yes!
Yes, I'm sorry!
Yes! Charlotte, it's so good!
Mommy!
[Birds chirping]
[intercom buzzes]
yes.
Dr. Thorndyke,
Dr. Montague is here.
Please take your hand away from your nose
and say that again.
Dr. Montague is here to see you.
Oh, thank you. Send him in.
Oh, Dr. Montague, thank you for coming.
I'm sorry I'm late.
It took longer than I anticipated to complete my rounds.
Please have a seat.
Thank you.
Ah!
Dr. Montague, I'm a little disturbed.
Yes, Dr. Thorndyke?
I've been going over some case histories,
and I have come across some patients
who behave in a rational and normal manner.
Zachary Cartwright III. For instance.
It seems his family's paying
$12,000 a month to the institute.
He should have been released months ago.
Well, these case histories are really so sketchy
they hardly draw a true picture
of the patient's psychosis.
Cartwright is a perfect example.
One moment he can be perfectly rational and lucid.
The next, he's a living looney tune.
Would you mind if we examined him together?
He's just outside my door.
Mind? Why should I mind?
After all, you're in charge here.
You can examine anyone you want.
Please send Mr. Cartwright in.
Thank you.
Hello, Mr. Cartwright.
You know Dr. Montague, don't you?
Hello, Dr. Montague.
Hello, Zach!
Please sit down.
Tell me, Mr. Cartwright,
do you know why you're here at the institute?
I was brought in two years ago.
I was suffering
from nervous exhaustion.
I used to get sharp pains in my neck
and dreamt about werewolves.
Werewolves?
Werewolves.
In the two years that you've been here,
do you feel you've made progress?
I never get pains anymore.
It's been six months since I have dreamed about a werewolf.
It's been six months since you dreamed about a werewolf.
Tell me, Mr. Cartwright,
frankly, if you were returned
to the community today,
do you think you could function in a happy, healthy,
in a normal and productive manner?
Oh, I think so. I feel pretty good.
Ow!
What's the matter?
That pain just came back.
You see, he's unpredictable.
Get him to the couch.
Sit right here, Mr. Cartwright.
Breathe deeply.
Try to relax.
I'll try.
This pain has reappeared for no apparent reason?
I don't know what it is.
Such a strange experience.
I think the pain is going away now.
Oh, good. Breathe deeply.
I feel fine.
Ow!
What is it?
Ow!
Is it the same pain?
Yes! Yes!
Let me examine you. No! No!
Let me help you!
Aah!
I don't understand this.
Me, either.
Relax, relax!
Take it easy.
Let me look.
Aah!
I'm just trying to help you!
Go away!
Take it easy!
What are we going to do?
Take it easy!
Help!
Aaahhh! Aaahhhh!
Aaahhh!
Get his feet!
Got him.
Ohh! Ohh!
Ohh! Ohh! Ohh!
Take him back to his room.
Give him a sedative.
Make it a big one.
Ohh! Ohh!
Sad. I've never seen anything quite like that.
And he was doing so well.
I know. It is sad.
Tears your heart apart.
Yes.
There's that flashing again.
Flashing?
It started this morning. Here it is again.
It seems to be coming from somewhere up there.
Yes. The north wing.
Room 35, I'd say.
It stopped.
Who's in that room?
A patient named Brisbane.
Brisbane.
Arthur Brisbane? The industrialist?
Yes, I think that's the one.
Hmm. How long has he been here?
Oh, about 18 months.
I didn't come across his name in the files.
It must be an oversight.
I'd like to meet him.
He's hopeless. You don't want to meet him.
I'd like to meet him right after lunch.
All right, as you wish.
I'll arrange it for you.
Thank you.
Uh, nurse Diesel, uh, Dr. Montague here.
Dr. Thorndyke would like to meet Arthur Brisbane
right after lunch.
Good.
Ou- yay on- knay at- whay oo- tay oo- day.
Et it- gay?
Everything will be taken care of.
There it goes again.
Aaaaaaaah!
Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Falling! Falling!
Ma! Mama! Falling!
Fight it, Thorndyke.
Fight it!
You must fight it. Do you hear me?
Fight your fears.
The only way to overcome high anxiety
is to fight it!
Fight.
Fight. Fight it.
Ja, fight it!
Fight it. Fight it.
Good. Fight it.
Fight it.
Good. Fight it.
Fight it.
Ja, good! That's the way!
Good, good, good!
Fight it! Fight it!
Good, good, good!
Ugh!
That's all right.
Get out that hostility.
Good. Fight.
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
Aah! Ooh!
So, you want to fight, huh?
All right, I'll give you a fight you don't forget.
I'll give you some fight.
Show me your stuff.
All right,
I'll give you one,
one of those, and one more!
Get up, you little punk! Stand up and fight!
Aagh!
Ooh!
Professor, what are you doing?
This is unseemly behavior!
What are you doing in here?
Stop!
Professor.
Aagh! I'll give you- - aargh!
Aah! Ugh! Aagh!
All right, come on, boys.
We came to see a fight, not a dance.
Mix it up!
[Ding!]
Professor,
what happened here?
Well, I put him under hypnosis.
He will be out very soon.
You see, we had been running a series of analytic sessions
to help him overcome a very serious illness
known as high anxiety.
High anxiety?
Ja.
[Laughing]
what? What?
Do you mean that Dr. Thorndyke,
one of the world's greatest psychiatric authorities,
is suffering from high anxiety?
Ja.
You wouldn't breathe a word of this, would you?
Professor.
Ja.
I am also a professional.
I'm shocked that you would think
I'd say a word about this.
Hey, everybody,
guess who has high anxiety?
Uh...
Ricard.
Falling! Mama!
Falling! Mama! Falling!
Ricard, Ricard, I'm going to bring you out.
I'm going to bring you out. I bring you out!
Ricard? Ricard, my boy, Ricard.
Professor, you'll never believe
what I just went through.
It was horrible.
I would believe. I believe.
But there will be no more sessions for a while.
Go get yourself a little rest.
Thank you, professor.
Ja, auf wiedersehen.
Ja.
Hmm, hmm, hmm.
So let us see here.
"Mama... I am falling. "
Ah...
Ooh!
[Rings doorbell]
norton, this is our new chief, Dr. Thorndyke.
He would like to see Mr. Brisbane.
Certainly.
It's a pleasure to meet you, Dr. Thorndyke.
It's a pleasure to meet you, norton.
Forgive me for prying.
What happened to your mustache?
As you know,
we get very violent patients in this wing.
Well, last week, I guess I wasn't on my toes,
and one of them ripped off half of my mustache.
That must have been awful.
You'll never know the pain.
It can get quite dicey up here at times.
Well, shall we go?
Follow me.
Hey, norton!
You missing something? Ha ha ha!
[Whimpering]
ruff!
[Growling]
[whimpering]
that's Arthur Brisbane, the industrialist?
[Whimpering]
ruff!
Ruff!
Ruff! Ruff!
No! No! Down! Down, Brisbane!
Bad! Bad, Brisbane!
Bad. Sit up. Sit up.
Beg. All right.
Don't worry. He won't bite.
Just let him smell you.
He thinks he's a cocker spaniel.
Cocker spaniel?
[Growling]
ok.
Here we are. Here we go. Here.
Very good. Very good.
Very good.
I've never seen anything like- -
ruff!
Down! Down! Sit! Sit! Down! Down!
Stay!
It's amazing.
It's the most complex psychic phenomenon I have ever witnessed.
I once read a paper
in college about this- -
i think it was otto rank- -
about a woman in vienna, a mrs. Nisbaum,
who thought she was an animal, an antelope.
What the hell are you- -
no! Stop that! Stop it!
Bad! Bad!
Don't do that with strangers!
Bad! You! Get his leash, norton!
[Growling]
ruff! Ruff!
Ruff! Ruff!
Extraordinary.
How could a creature like that have the wherewithal
to contact me by flashing a mirror?
Well, cockers are very bright, you know.
That's true. That's very true.
Ruff!
[Growling]
[growling]
[whimpering]
you don't understand. I can't go on.
I swear I won't say a word,
but I can't take it any longer.
You're just as much a part of this as the rest of us.
No one's quitting.
Do you hear me?
No one!
But I can't sleep at night!
What we're doing is wrong.
Don't you understand?
I've got to get out!
I feel like I'm caught in a web!
Be quiet, fool!
The window's open.
All right...
Perhaps...
I have been too... Harsh.
You are free
to leave the institute this evening.
Oh, thank you. Thank you, nurse Diesel,
and I promise I won't say anything to anyone.
Thank you.
I know you won't.
[Horn honks]
[very loud radio]
~~ if you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
~~ loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud ~~
~~ if you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
~~ loud ~~
~~ if you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
[tires screeching]
~~ loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud ~~
~~ oh, whisper sweet nothings in my ear ~~
~~ if you love me ~~
~~ tell me loud and clear ~~
~~ yeah ~~
~~ if you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
~~ yeah ~~
~~ if you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
aah!
~~ If you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
~~ loud, loud, loud, loud loud, loud, loud, loud ~~
aah!
Aah!
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Aah!
~~ If you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
~~ if you love me, baby, tell me loud ~~
~~ loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud, loud ~~
~~ loud ~~~~
busted eardrums?
That's a very strange symptom
for a cerebral hemorrhage.
According to the coroner's report,
Wentworth did suffer from a cerebral hemorrhage.
I can't go to San Francisco at a time like this.
Dr. Thorndyke, there's nothing you can do.
If we receive any additional information about Wentworth,
we'll call you.
It's important that you attend the psychiatric convention.
Remember, youare representing the institute.
Yes, enjoy yourself, for god's sakes.
Get your mind off the Wentworth murder.
[Slap]
accident, accident.
Have a good time.
Well, I did work long and hard on that speech.
Mm- hmm. Mm- hmm.
I'm going. You've convinced me.
Brophy!
Just looking for my camera. I wanna get one last shot.
Oh.
Please, Brophy, not now.
Hold it.
Ok, let's hit the road.
See you in three days.
Bye.
Bye- bye.
Enjoy yourself.
Bye.
Bye- bye.
I think you punctured something with that last shot.
You do everything too hard.
Come to my room after dinner.
No, not tonight. I'm too tired. I'm going to turn in early.
I'll let you wear my underwear.
I'll be there.
Thorndyke and Brophy.
Yes, sir.
Thank you.
Dr. Ricard H. Thorndyke.
Oh, yes, yes.
Very good. You're all set.
Wow, talk about "modren. "
You and Mr. Brophy are in 1702 and 1703.
Excuse me,
i requested a room on a lower floor,
nothing higher than three.
We had 201 for you,
but a Mr. Mcguffin called...
And told us to change it to the 17th floor.
We can't do a thing about it. We're all booked up.
Come on, it's only for a couple nights.
Oh, I guess it will be all right.
It's just...
I really don't like high...
Places.
Oh, Dennis,
will you take Dr. Thorndyke to his room, please?
Anything I can get you?
Yes. A newspaper.
I'll get one and meet you at the elevators.
Please don't forget. It's important.
All right already!
I want to see if there's any mention of Wentworth's death.
Yeah.
Oh, doc, there's the elevators!
Come on.
I'm- - I'm- - I'm coming. I'm coming.
[Ding]
[ding]
here we go,
straight to the top.
[Gasping]
[gasping]
quite a view, isn't it?
[Gasping]
[ding]
here we are, top floor.
You can't get any higher.
We're pretty high.
We know we're high!
That part we know!
Excuse me, this way.
This way, please. Right around the corner.
Wow! Hey, doc, look at this!
What a view!
This is spectacular!
I can see it from here.
It's very nice, very nice indeed,
very nice.
Aah!
Oh!
Ah! Oh! Ooh!
Wooo! Oh!
Wooo! Wooo!
Oh!
Are you all right, doc?
Are you all right?
I'm all right. I'm all right, Brophy.
I'm all right.
I'm sorry, sir.
I didn't know anyone was there.
You fellas want to see your rooms or not?
Huh?
Come on, let's get out of here.
Ah! Ah!
Ooh!
Oh! Oh!
If you would have gone over,
you would have been smashed like corned beef hash.
Your brains would have splattered all over the lobby.
Your guts would have been- - Brophy, please.
Oh, yeah.
Right here is 1702.
You're in 1703. Here's your key.
I'll bring your bag in a minute.
See you later. Thank you.
Here you go. Thank you very much.
Thank you. Anything else I can get you?
Oh, yes. My newspaper. What happened to my newspaper?
The newsstand didn't have any.
I didn't feel like running around the corner it's a hassle.
I want that newspaper. It's very important!
All right, I'll get your paper!
"A hassle. " Don't forget!
All right! All right!
What's so important about a lousy, crummy newspaper?
Oh, Dennis,
Dr. Thorndyke in room 1702
just called down to remind you- -
i know! Get the newspaper!
Get the newspaper! Get the stinking newspaper!
Here!
Aah! Aah!
Aah!
Here! Aah!
Here!
Here, here's your paper!
Here's your paper!
Happy now?
Happy?
Happy now?
That kid gets no tip.
[Knock on door]
who is it?
[Knocking]
who is it?
It's not the bellboy, is it?
[Knocking]
get away from the door!
[Gasping]
who are you?
Get away!
Just a second.
Quiet. They'll hear.
Don't move.
Go to your room.
The drapes! Close the drapes!
"The drapes. Close the drapes. "
Close the drapes.
Close the other one.
Get down! Lower!
Good. Quick, come here.
Get up.
Sit down.
Not there, here.
Here?
There.
Who are you, and who are they?
Quick, make believe you know me terribly well,
terribly well.
Uhh...
Oh!
What's your sign?
I'm sorry. It's... Unlisted.
Boy, you sure blow hot and cold.
No offense. Who are you?
I'm Victoria Brisbane.
My father is Arthur Brisbane.
You're the cocker's daughter?
Have you seen my father at the institute?
Is he all right?
He's fine. He's coming along fine.
He's very affectionate. He licked me.
He what?
Well, he thinks he's a dog.
A dog?
A dog, yes.
Do you mind if I smoke?
Not at all.
I see, a dog, mm- hmm.
Well.
Dr. Thorndyke, I assure you
my father is just as sane as I am.
[Spit's]
hmm.
18 Months ago,
he suffered a nervous breakdown.
He went into the institute to rest
and has been a prisoner there ever since.
I fear for his life.
I assure you I am a competent psychiatrist.
I met and examined your father.
I must tell you, in my professional capacity,
he's deeply disturbed.
[Knock on door]
don't answer it.
If they know I'm here,
they'll harm my father.
Doc, you're late.
I'll be right down.
That's Brophy, my driver.
He's all right.
Miss Brisbane, I'm sorry. I must go.
They're waiting for me.
Don't you believe what I'm telling you?
It's not that I don't care.
I am the principal speaker at the convention.
I must go. I'm late.
We'll meet at the bar later and discuss it.
Fine. Later at the bar, that's perfect.
Let's go.
Here we go.
See, there's no one here.
There are no enemies.
There's nothing to- -
worry about.
Let me see you to the elevator.
Nice hotel, isn't it?
Kind of high.
[Pounds gavel]
may I have your attention?
May I have your attention, please?
Fellow members of the american psychiatric convention,
it is an honor to present the new head
of the psycho- neurotic institute for the very, very nervous,
winner of the nobel prize for his works
in the use of chemotherapy on severe psychosis,
the distinguished Dr. Ricard H. Thorndyke.
[Audience applauds]
thank you, Dr. Colburn.
Fellow analysts,
psychiatrists...
Psychologists...
And laypeople...
Today... I would like to discuss
some of the lesser- known aspects of psychobiological therapy.
100 Years ago...
Psychology was akin to witchcraft,
but some of these great people,
these giants behind me,
gave us... A nice living.
I don't know what they said.
I only know that they met.
What do you want me to do, kill 'em?
If you want me to, I'll kill them.
I don't have to kill them, but I'd like to.
I killed Ashley and Wentworth.
Another killing or two won't make any difference.
It would make me happy.
I'd like to kill them both.
I think it would be better if I kill both.
Let me kill just one, then, whichever one you want.
Ok, I'll wait,
but the minute you say "kill them, "
I'll kill them.
I'll love to kill them.
It would give me immense pleasure.
... And so in conclusion,
let me reiterate
that there are no rules,
that each patient is a supreme individual
endowed with those qualities that distinguish the human being
from the slime from which... He emerged.
Thank you.
[Audience applauds]
yes, Dr. Colburn.
Dr. Thorndyke, may I ask you a question?
Certainly.
Dr. Thorndyke,
you mentioned in your address that penis envy
should be deemed an antiquated psychiatric concept.
Could you expand on that?
Of course.
Let us remember
that the term "penis envy"
was created in a predominantly male atmosphere and that- -
excuse me.
Sorry I'm late.
Forgive me for bringing the kids.
I couldn't get a sitter.
Please, have a seat.
As I was saying,
in a world of predominantly male- oriented psychology,
it was only natural to arrive at the term pe- -
pe- -
peepee envy.
Are you saying there's absolutely no validity to...
Peepee envy?
It has no more validity than if men envied women's- -
balloons.
Dr. Thorndyke.
Sir, do you feel that the trauma of toilet training
has any bearing on the sexual future
of the adolescent?
Toilet training. Toilet training.
That's a vast area.
Let's be more specific.
Are we talking about- -
number one...
Or cocky- doody?
Well, let's say, for the sake of argument, cocky- doody.
Professionally, I'd say that cocky- doody has very little to do
with the future sexual development of the adolescent.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Let me backtrack. The female erogenous zone- -
the balloons?
Uh, no, no, no.
Uh, lower, lower, much lower, um...
Where the babies come out of,
the wo- - the woowoo.
The woowoo?
Yes, the woowoo,
perhaps the most significant psychological feminine component
known to mankind.
[Audience applauds]
bravo!
Here we are.
A b&b and b&b&b.
Thank you.
"Dr. Ricard H. Thorndyke. "
What does the "h" stand for?
Hasssn.
What?
Harpo.
My mother loved the Marx Brothers.
She saw all their movies.
She named me Harpo.
Harpo, Harpo...
I like it. It's very refreshing.
There are certain names that you just don't hear
very often these days.
Anyway, here's to daddy's recovery.
To daddy's recovery.
Feeling better?
You will never know how wonderful you've made me feel
by allowing me to visit my father at the institute.
I can't believe I'll actually see him!
Miss Brisbane, I must warn you.
You may be in for quite a shock.
I don't care. I just know that if I can see him,
everything will be all right.
It's songtime here at the piano bar.
That means I lay back and let you sing.
How about you, sir?
How about you, ma'am?
No? How about you, doc?
How about giving us a tune?
Me? I don't sing.
I really don't sing, not professionally, anyway.
Come on, doc. Give us a song.
Doc, you can do it.
Go ahead. It'll be fun.
All right.
Do you know high anxiety?
You got it.
Is b flat ok?
B flat?
The key.
Oh, the key. That's fine, sure.
Sing in here?
Um- hmm.
Any time.
~~ High anxiety ~~
~~ whenever you're near ~~
~~ high anxiety ~~
~~ it's you that I fear ~~
~~ ~~ my heart's afraid to fly
~~ it's crashed before ~~
~~ but then you take my hand ~~
~~ my heart starts to soar ~~
~~ once more ~~
~~ high anxiety ~~
~~ it's always the same ~~
~~ ooh! Xiety ~~
~~ it's you that I blame ~~
~~ it's very clear to me ~~
~~ I have got to give in ~~
~~ high anxiety ~~
~~ you win ~~
hiya, Tex. Where you from?
Cincinnati.
Great town. Love that big red machine.
Ease up on the linguine.
Hello, young lovers, whoever you are.
What do I spy, a grain of rice?
Newly married?
This morning.
And they said it wouldn't last.
~~ But then you take my hand ~~
~~ my heart starts to soar ~~
~~ once more ~~
key change!
~~ High anxiety ~~
~~ it's always the same ~~
~~ hey! Xiety ~~
~~ it's you that I blame ~~
~~ it's very clear to me ~~
~~ I have got to give in ~~
~~ high anxiety ~~
remember, folks. Be good to your parents.
They've been good to you.
~~ You win ~~~~
jeepers, Ricard! That was terrific.
I am so impressed.
Have you ever thought of singing professionally?
No. The big bucks are in psychiatry.
I mean, it's so much more emotionally rewarding...
Exactly.
To help people.
Excuse me.
I have to go to the little girls' room.
[Thud]
oh, excuse me. Sorry.
There you go.
Forgive me for prying,
but who is this gentleman?
What are you talking about? That's daddy.
Are you trying to tell me
that this man is Arthur Brisbane, your father?
Of course.
This is not the man
i met at the institute.
Something is very, very wrong.
What are we going to do? This is serious.
He knows. He's seen the picture.
He knows that's not the real Brisbane we showed him.
More coffee, please.
What'll we do? What'll we do?
We'll have to kill him.
We'll have to let him kill him.
That's all we need, another killing.
Give me a cookie.
First Ashley, then Wentworth,
we can't kill Thorndyke
without the police suspecting something.
Pass me the cream, please.
But what are we going to do?
Supposing he goes to the police.
I thought of that. He won't go to the police
if he can't go to the police.
I don't understand. Sugar, please.
What do you mean if he can't go to the police?
Why can't he?
Because the police will be looking for him.
Why would the police be looking for him?
Because Thorndyke is going to kill somebody.
Oh?
Here.
Finish your strudel.
Here are the keys.
Weren't you and Dr. Thorndyke supposed to check out tomorrow?
Early this morning, bang!
The doc says we got to get back to the institute.
Can I take some shots of this joint?
I like this joint. What a joint!
This place is beautiful!
It's terrific. It's gorgeous. It's gorgeous.
There.
That's beautiful.
The elevators.
The elevators, good, good. Ooh, Dr. Thorndyke!
Dr. Thorndyke, I hear you're leaving.
What about the seminar this afternoon?
Aah! Aah!
Aah!
Dr. Thorndyke.
Yes?
Here's a present for you.
What is this? Who are you?
Ha ha ha!
Why, you! Wait!
Who are you? What does this mean?
What does this mean?
Aah!
That's the man!
That's the man who shot him!
You don't understand. This is not my gun.
Oh, my god. That man is dead.
I didn't- - he shot him.
I'm sure. He took off a mask. He took off my face.
This was given to me
by somebody who looked like me.
This is me's gun. Not mine.
Don't go for your guns. I'm a psychiatrist.
We can discuss this.
We're rational- - ohh!
Doc, why did you do it?
Why did you do it?
No, no, I'm all right.
I'm fine. I'm just fine.
I'm at the golden gate park.
Meet me in a half hour
at the north by northwest corner.
Yes.
Good.
[Whistling]
whew!
Oh!
The world has gone crazy.
Nothing makes any sense anymore.
I don't know what to believe.
My life's all topsy- turvy.
One minute, you're singing a love song.
The next minute, you're pumping bullets into an innocent man.
It's not you, it's the other Thorndyke.
How much can a girl take?
My nerves are cracking.
I feel like I'm going to die.
I think I am going to explode!
Vicki, vicki, take it easy, darling.
I'm sorry. Please forgive me.
I'm just so close to my menstrual cycle that I could scream.
Aah!
Vicki, please, we've got to think.
The only way out of this
is to prove I didn't commit that murder.
How? Look at today's paper.
That is you pulling the trigger.
Who took this picture?
My buddy Brophy. Wait a minute.
I was coming down in the elevator
at the time of the shooting.
Here's the elevator. Here's me.
See that little dot?
That figure is so tiny, it's unrecognizable.
Brophy. Brophy has the negative.
You've got to contact Brophy and have him blow up this negative.
Enlarge it and prove that's me in the elevator.
He left this morning. He's probably back at the institute by now.
How can you get so excited at a time like this?
It's not that I'm not titillated- -
we've got to separate.
Gosh, you're fickle.
We can't stay together. We can't be seen.
Go back to your hotel room. Call Brophy, get him to blow up that negative.
I'll call you later.
[Buzzer]
yeah, it's coming. It's coming.
It's coming. It's coming.
Holy toledo, you're right!
Thereisa figure in the elevator.
I think it's the doc!
It's got to be much bigger!
I'll enlarge this until we see his face.
Call me in an hour.
That's the doc!
Good work!
Very good work, Brophy.
Unfortunately, it will never be seen.
We've got to destroy the negative.
Give us the negative, Brophy.
You'll never get it! Never! Never!
Do you hear me? You'll never get this.
I'd rather die first!
Norton.
Here.
Hmm.
You fool! That negative has been on the front page
of every newspaper in San Francisco.
They can enlarge it as well.
You're right. I never thought of that.
We've got to think.
I've got it!
We have to buy every newspaper in San Francisco!
We'll need about $10,000 worth of change.
Get a truck, a big truck,
go around to the newspapers- -
all the stands.
You put the paper...
Perhaps it's not a good idea.
It sucks.
Norton, take our good friend Mr. Brophy here
to the north wing.
You see, darling,
it's not the negative that has to be destroyed.
It's Dr. Ricard Thorndyke.
I think we'd better call our friend in San Francisco
with the tin teeth.
Oh, I get so hot when you're bad.
Oh!
Ahh!
[Beep beep beep]
[click]
hey, excuse me.
[Telephone rings]
Diesel here.
Collect call from San Francisco.
I'll accept the charges.
It's me. What do you want?
Hello, braces.
I have a little present for you.
You may kill Thorndyke.
[Breathes]
thank you. I really appreciate this.
[Breathes]
i really do.
[Breathes]
life is good.
[Telephone rings]
[ring]
aah!
Hello.
Aah! Aah!
Uuh! Uaaah!
Mister, I don't go for this sort of thing.
Uuh! Ahhhh!
Aah! Aah! Uuuh!
I know other girls are turned on
by these kinky phone calls,
but I really couldn't care less.
Aah! Uhhh!
How did you, uh... Get my room number?
Uuh! Oooh!
Ooooh! Ohh!
I'm not going to listen to any more!
I've had just about enough!
Ooooh!
What are you wearing?
Chuh! ChI! Chi!
Jeans?
Aaah!
You're wearing jeans?
Eyuh!
I bet they're tight.
Aah! Ah! Ah!
Aaaah!
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Oh, my god!
Haa! Haa! Haa! Haa! Haa!
Haaaaaaah!
Ahhhh.
You- - you are an animal!
Vicki!
Victoria,
it's me, Ricard.
Ricard!
Ricard. Ricard.
No! Ricard!
I knew it was you.
I just went along with it.
Ha ha ha ha ha!
I laugh. Did you laugh?
Victoria, I just killed a man.
Another one?
Ricard, get a grip on yourself.
I killed the man who killed the man in the lobby.
Did you reach Brophy?
I did. He said therewasa figure in the elevator,
and that itmightbe you.
He was going to keep enlarging until he was certain.
I waited for one hour and called back.
And?
And they said he wasn't there.
Oh, my god, they know!
They know everything!
They've got Brophy. They've got the picture.
How are we going to prove that you're innocent?
We've got to get back to the institute!
We've got to find your father!
We must expose Diesel and Montague for what they are!
The police are all over the place.
Go to the salvation army.
The salvation army?
Are they good at this sort of thing?
No! Go to the salvation army,
and get...
Ricard.
Ricard, wait a minute!
What is it?
I don't think I can go through with this.
Look at this clothing!
What makes you think we'll sneak by these people?
If we do it the way we rehearsed it, it will work.
We're not sneaking by.
We have to be loud and annoying.
If you're loud and annoying,
psychologically, people don't notice you.
[Yiddish accent] take this. I can't carry this no more.
[Yiddish accent] celery you buy in San Francisco?
You couldn't get it by the market near our house?
Excuse me. I bought the celery
in case on the plane they served a bloody mary.
A bloody mary!
I don't like the bloody mary they serve on the plane!
It's too burning!
They don't even put tomato juice!
They put in snap- e- pepe!
Remember Murray Weintraub?
He always drank the bloody marys with the pepe- snap- e!
Know where he is now? Mt. Hebron, dead!
Murray Weintraub is not dead. He's alive.
No! No! No!
No! No! No! No!
Morris! Morris Turtletaub
you're talking about.
The one that walks sideways like this.
Ba- bay- ba- bing- ba- ba- bing.
Be- ba- bung- be- bing.
No, sir!
Morris Turtletaub didn't walk like that.
Morris Turtletaub, to my memory, walked just like this.
~~ Moy a di da ~~
woik!
~~ Bi da bi da ~~
woik!
A little irregular.
~~ Woi da wi da woik! ~~~~
Couldn't help himself.
Come on! Let's get out of here.
Don't push!
Come on!
Don't push!
Put your bags here.
What do you need the bags for?
We have to x- ray them.
You have to x- ray? You want to x- ray the celery?
You think we're smuggling dope in the celery?
The celery is not for dope. It's for dip!
Please step through.
You go!
I can't. I'm scared.
Go through, already!
Wait a minute! Wait a minute!
Is this one of those blowers what blows up the skirt,
gives everybody a free show?
Don't make trouble in the airport.
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
Ok. Come on, sam.
All right! All right!
Here I go, folks!
Uh, sam! Mmm!
Uh! Mmm!
What?
Mmmmmmmmmm!
Oooooh!
Well...
Here I go.
[Beep]
[beep]
what is this, a game show? What did I win, a pinto?
We'll have to search you.
What did I do?
You beeped.
I beeped! I beeped! Take me away!
Take me back to russia!
Put me in irons! I beeped!
The mad beeper is loose! Take away the beeper!
Sir, it's all right.
It's all right?
Please go.
Ricard, you were absolutely brilliant!
You were wonderful yourself. Come on.
Professor Lilloman?
Professor?
Oh, my god, he's dead!
Dead? Who's dead?
Somebody died?
Where?
We thought you were dead!
I sleep that way.
It scares the hell out of everyone.
Professor, have you seen my father?
Your father?
Who are you?
This is Victoria Brisbane.
Her father is Arthur Brisbane.
Oh! This is the cocker's daughter?
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
How- - how do you do?
I'm sorry for you.
We are looking for Brophy.
It's important we find Brophy!
I'm sorry to have to tell you,
but Brophy was taken to the north wing.
What?
According to Montague,
the poor chap had a mental breakdown.
Mental breakdown?
Brophy's not smart enough to have a mental breakdown.
The north wing.
We've got to go.
I go with you! Perhaps I can help.
Come on. Hurry.
Brophy! Brophy!
Where is Brisbane?
Oh, I'm sorry.
They took him to- -
aaaooooohh!
Norton's taken him to the tower!
Oh, my god!
They drugged him.
They'll throw him off. Make it look like suicide.
[Musical sting]
dad!
Come on! Let's go!
There! Look!
Oh! Daddy!
Ricard! Ricard, do something!
I'll try. I'll try.
[Thunder]
aah!
Oh! Oh!
I can't! I can't!
What is it?
He suffers from high anxiety.
It strikes one out of seven.
I'll stop him!
I go, too.
Oh, god, I feel like such a...
Coward.
Yeah.
[Gasping]
i can't go on!
I got him!
I ain't got him.
What can we do?
I've got to save him.
No! He'll kill you!
I'm going to go up!
Aah! Aah!
Aaaaah!
Oh, my god!
He's going to fall!
Uuh! Uuh!
Hold on!
Pull yourself up! You can do it!
I can't hang on!
I can't... Hang on!
Ricard, listen to me!
I have researched your case.
I know what is giving you the high anxiety.
I have found the answer.
Go back in your mind. Go back...
You are a little baby.
Your mother and father are fighting.
They're always fighting.
They are fighting about you!
Da da!
Da ba ba ba!
Da da da da da da!
I hate this kid!
He's making us prisoners.
We can never go out!
Do you want me to get rid of him?
Da da!
Shut him up!
I can't take it!
He's falling!
Oh, my god, he's falling!
I understand now!
It's not height I'm afraid of!
It's parents!
Ja! Ja!
Now climb, you son of a bitch!
Climb!
Come on, doc! You can do it!
He's almost at the top!
Hurry, Ricard!
Come on, doc!
Norton!
Oh!
Mr. Brisbane,
are you all right?
Yes, I'm all right.
Let's get down the stairs.
Thank you. You saved my life.
Thank god it's over.
Thank god it's all over.
Aaaaaah!
Aaah!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Oh!
Fins!
I give up!
I never liked her.
She never bathed.
But I like you.
I'll do anything you say.
I'm good at that.
If I don't behave, beat the crap out of me.
I wouldn't mind.
Aah!
Doc, are you all right?
We seen a figure fall.
It was nurse Diesel.
Daddy! I love you!
My baby! My baby!
My boss! My boss!
Brophy! Brophy!
My Ricard! My Ricard!
Professor! Professor!
You saved my life!
Ja! Ja!
You savedmylife.
Who are you?
Dad.
Daddy, this is the man I'm going to marry.
Jeepers, vickI!
Isn't he a dreamboat?
Bye, dad!
Ahhhh.
Oh, I absolutely love my new name... 1687 0