It's 24 hours till the next train.
We're gonna have to get a hotel room.
One hotel room...
Ms. Dixie, where am I to sleep?
- Buy it. - It's 600 dollars.
It's a special night. We're in Chicago,
we're together, this is the dream.
RUBY RICHARDSON: Oh! Are my tits out?
Yeah.
But you got great tits, so don't worry about it.
Thank you so much. I'm Ruby.
I'm Alice.
Hey, I'm here, so where are you?
- You found me. - Fiona, I'm not doing the tour!
If I wanted cash, Billy, I'd want a hell of a lot
more than this before I let you forget about me.
♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
I have this money because I fucked up in my job,
so I can never go back.
If you want to go home, I'll understand.
But I really don't want you to.
(PANTING)
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪
Billy: So we experience ourselves from the inside,
and other people from the outside.
Don't we?
- Don't we? - (AUDIENCE AGREEING)
Yes, we do. Okay. (LAUGHS)
It's a fact. By the very nature of this dynamic,
don't we imagine ourselves
to be more complex
than the next person?
Turn up the follow spot.
More complex than everybody.
- (SCATTERED CHEERING) - Yes, we do. (LAUGH)
- (TEXT CHIMES) - Don't we imagine ourselves
to be capable of weirder, darker things?
Self-sabotage, strange counter-intuitive behaviors,
random acts of beauty?
Yes, we do. We do, and because of this,
we distance and doubt ourselves.
We doubt our right to be listened to...
- and we doubt our right to be loved. - (MOUTHING)
(AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING)
(SCATTERED CHEERS)
Shouldn't do that. Stop doubting, start trusting.
Trust in how amazing you are.
Amaze. You.
- I'm Billy Johnson, and I've changed your life. - (APPLAUSE)
That's not true. (LAUGH)
(CHEERING GETS LOUDER)
Thank you very much. Thank you very much.
(APPLAUSE, CHEERING)
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(GASP) Fuck!
♪ ♪
(DOORS SLAMMING)
- (TRAFFIC NOISE) - (RUMBLING)
So, last night was...
That was lovely.
Yeah, good.
Good. I mean, I can-I can do better.
No, I wouldn't want it any better.
- So, it could've been better? - No!
- No, you just said... That's not what I said. - Was it... not good enough?
'Cause nobody's perfect.
What-what...
Are-are you trying to say that...
- No. No, no. - Like I wasn't...?
Um, so which time...
- What? - Which time...
like wasn't perfect for you?
It doesn't have to be perfect. (SIGHS)
You chose that word.
I just remember it being...
Oh! What?
Just a... just a little more...
Ruby: What?
Uh, a little more...
Mmm...
(R&B MUSIC ON RADIO)
(SIGHS)
Billy: Hey, are we gonna make this train, buddy?
(CRUNCHING)
- (TRAIN HORN BLARES) - (RUMBLING)
Announcer (ON PA): May I have your attention, please?
This is the final call for the 0800 to Los Angeles.
Please board the train now as it is ready to depart.
♪ ♪
Billy: Oh, perfect timing!
(RUBY PANTING)
At least something's perfect.
I'm a dick, all right?
Yeah.
(RUBY MOANS)
How long were we asleep?
Hm.
(TRAIN RUMBLING)
Where are we?
Are those cowboys?
Oh my God...
(TEXT CHIMES, BUZZES)
RUBY: Oh my God.
(DOOR SLIDES OPEN)
♪ ♪
- (DIALING) - (QUIETLY): Oh my God.
Automated Voice: Hello. No one is available to take your call.
Please leave a message after the tone.
- (TONE) - Hey! It's me.
So, I got 32 missed calls from you.
Are you okay? Call me back.
(RINGING)
Laurence (ON VOICEMAIL): Hi there. You've reached the Richardsons.
Leave a message...
(TEXT CHIMES, BUZZES)
Billy: No, it's me. It's me.
Huh. It's my...
grandma, texting from Ireland.
Isn't it the middle of the night now in Ireland?
Yeah, she just, um,
she just taunts me.
Your grandma taunts you by text
in the middle of the night?
Yeah.
That's new.
She's been a nightmare since the new tariff.
(TYPING)
You're texting her?
- BILLY: Yeah. - Maybe don't encourage her.
(TEXT WHOOSHES)
(WHOOSHES)
- She still going? - Yeah.
- What is she saying? - Uh, she's calling me, like, a fecking eejit...
(TEXT CHIMES) - Grandma my ass! What are you hiding?
No! No! No! New rule! New rule!
(RUBY CLEARS THROAT)
If something we're saying
sounds unlikely to be true, we... we don't question it.
We just trust that we are wanted and adored.
- Uh... - Come on.
It-it works both ways.
Okay.
(KNOCKING)
- WOMAN: Tickets, please! - Oh.
Oh God.
(SIGHS)
(CLEARS THROAT)
- Sorry. - Thank you.
(GROAN)
(RUBY MUTTERING)
You just literally had it on the way into the station.
Yes, I know. Bear with me.
(RUMMAGING)
Long day?
Well, it ends tomorrow, so...
Ha! Got it.
Billy: Thank you.
(KISS)
♪ ♪
Ruby: I'm gonna go text my grandma.
(RUMBLING, HORN HONKING)
(QUIET CHATTER)
Laurence, please take my calls. What's going on?
(RUMBLING CONTINUES)
(DOOR HISSING)
Fiona: Are you following me?
What the fuck!
Who gets a train?
- (GASP) I love them! - We're so terrible.
I have never ever...
Well, this is the new you.
Laurence won't take my calls
and I just know that something's wrong,
and I think he's screening me.
Try my phone.
- Are you sure? - Yeah.
I'm paranoid he knows who I'm with.
- Why? - (SIGHS)
If it was anyone else, it would be disastrous.
- But, Billy? - (LINE RINGING)
- Automated Voice: Hello. No one is available... - Voicemail again.
Shit.
Does Billy know about Laurence?
Um...
Yeah, but...
He doesn't know you have kids.
(QUIETLY): Ah...
Do you like slightly stale coffee?
Can I be very honest with you?
- I think you're amazing. - Oh.
You don't have to say that.
You chose yourself over everybody.
I'm not sure that's noble.
Don't let them have you believe it.
Do you have plans for after the train?
No...
It doesn't seem real yet.
And I have no idea what he's thinking. I mean...
He has this...
big bag of money
from a bank.
- What? - I know!
What, is he gonna dig a hole?
Maybe he just really hates ATMs.
He's such a weirdo.
What are you doin' here?
I am visiting a lumberjack that I met on eHarmony.
Oh...
- (GROANS) - (LAUGHS)
I should go find the boy.
- RUBY: All right. - FIONA: Bye.
♪ ♪
(DIALING)
(TAPPING)
(DOORS HISSING)
RUBY: Sorry.
(RATTLING)
Damn it!
(DIALING)
(BEEP) - AUTOMATED VOICE: Hello, no one is available to take...
Hello, no one is available...
(RINGING)
- Please leave a message... - Fuck!
♪
(KNOCKING)
Billy?
♪ ♪
(LINE RINGING)
(SIGHS)
(TEXT CHIMES, BUZZES)
♪
(DOOR SLAMS)
♪ ♪
Man (ON PA): Welcome to the Amtrak service to Union Station, Los Angeles.
The dining car and snack bar...
- Hey. - Hey.
Hey...
Will you mind this?
Mm-mmm. I don't wanna look after your money.
It's not my money.
It's our money.
Hey, why is it all in cash?
Because I'm gonna dig a hole for it like a dog.
Alice said you were gonna dig a hole.
- Who's Alice? - My friend
that I met at the department store.
- You made a friend in the department store? - Yeah!
And she's on the train!
What does she look like?
Um, short, pretty,
dark hair.
Did you talk about me with Alice?
Yeah, we may have gossiped.
(GASP) Do you think Laurence is having me followed?
Hi, Ruby!
Alice!
Alice...
So, you're the very famous Billy Johnson.
Yeah.
I was just so curious.
- Is this weird? I feel weird. I'm sorry. - No!
- Ruby's worried you're following her. - Billy.
I know! We keep bumping into each other
and divulging our secrets.
What are you doing on this train, Alice?
Oh, I'm, I'm heading to California.
To meet a lumberjack.
He's taking me to Disneyland.
Have you ever been?
You should take y-your, um...
Nieces and nephews, if you have any.
Or, you two could go together!
Though I'm not convinced this one would stand in the lines.
He can barely stand and wait for someone to finish...
- (TEXT CHIMES, BUZZES) - in the toilet, I imagine.
♪ ♪
What's wrong?
- What happened!? - Laurence (ON PHONE): He fell off of a trampoline.
Trampoline?!
Why are you ignoring my calls?
I literally just got out of the ER.
- Oh. - LAURENCE: We were in there all night.
Well, I'm sorry I wasn't there.
It's okay.
Ruby (ON PHONE): You stopped my cards.
Uh-huh.
And that voicemail message.
(CLEARS THROAT)
- I was mad at you. - RUBY: Yeah.
Laurence: I changed it back again.
Ruby: Can I talk to Scooter?
He's sleeping.
RUBY: Oh.
He's been through a lot.
- Ruby... - RUBY: Yeah?
You having another breakdown?
♪ ♪
Laurence: Ruby? Ruby!
- Ruby said you cleared out the bank account in Chicago. - Did she?
Well, it is my company.
Yes, but it's our profits.
You think that I'd take your share?
Well, I-I don't know anymore.
Well, Ruby trusts me.
Yeah, can you stay away from her, please?
As soon as I saw you with her, I knew what you were doing.
"Run."
I can't wait to read the book.
No, there'll be none of that. I just...
- I want to be with her. - She's a phase.
I think this is a big deal for her, but once you get over it,
- she'll be fucked! - I won't get over it.
So fuck off and stop messing with my head.
You're only asking me these things
because you want me to come back,
but I'm not gonna do that 'cause I don't care about you.
♪ ♪
I'm really glad that she doesn't know
about the real reason you texted her.
(TEXT WHOOSHES)
(TEXT CHIMES)
Billy (ON RECORDING): My love and I made a pact
that one day, one of us would text "Run"
and if the other person texted "Run" back within 24 hours...
- For fuck's sake. - We would meet at Grand Central Station.
- Let's hear it again. - No. Just turn it off.
(AUDIO PLAYING) - Please turn it off. Gimme that. Gimme that!
Woman: Tickets, please!
- Give it to me! - Get off!
- Give it to me! - WOMAN: Tickets, please.
Oh...
- I wasn't... - Oh!
BILLY: Fuck's sake.
♪ ♪
I gave you a lot of money.
I quite might like some more.
I'm-I'm-I'm sorry.
- I don't want sorry. - SCOOTER: Dad!
Ruby: Well, I'm-I'm not having a...
Is that Scooter?
(SIGH) No.
- RUBY: Put him on. Hey! - Hang on.
- Put him on! Hey! Put him... - Scooter (ON PHONE): Hello.
Scooter! Hey, how are you?
I fell off a trampoline.
Ruby: Uh, what trampoline?
In a trampoline park.
- Did-did Dad take you... - No, Sarah took us.
What... who's Sarah?
Our new au pair.
(STAMMERING) Uh, your dad got...
Wait, um, is she... (SIGH) Who is she?
- SCOOTER: She has blue hair. - Sarah (ON PHONE): Scooter!
- SARAH: We're going! - And she's taking us for ice cream, so I better...
I miss you so much. I'm gonna come home from my vacation...
- right now. - Okay, bye.
- Scooter? Scooter? - (LINE DISCONNECTS)
♪ There are miles ♪
♪ Between us ♪
(RUMBLING)
♪ Time between us ♪
♪ There is something between us ♪
(RUBY SIGHS)
♪ I may be a fool ♪
♪ To dream of you ♪
(KNOCKING)
♪ But, God, it feels so good to dream ♪
- Hi! - Did you get to speak to him?
Yeah, Scooter, just-just a broken arm.
Well, where was Laurence at the time?
Oh, well, we-we-we can't watch them every second.
- He got a nanny. - Of course he did.
And Scooter wasn't even missing me.
Am I... am I just the lady
who-who washes his emoji pajamas?
- Ruby... - What?
Well first, you complain
that Laurence is calling you over 100 times and now
you're freaking out that nobody wants you enough!
- No, but what... - Look.
You made a decision, okay?
The kids will survive.
They'll be happy to see you when they see you,
and when you've gone, well, they'll get on fine.
I don't want them to get on without me.
- You don't? - No!
Well, go back home then.
I can't do that to Billy.
- No? - No, he needs me.
You don't know him anymore.
Me and Billy have been working together for years.
♪ ♪
Oh...
You're just so gullible, Ruby.
(WHISPERS): Get outta my roomette.
I just need you to do one thing.
- What? - Gimme the money.
- Hm? - The bag of money.
I don't understand.
What I'm saying is that I would like you to give me
that bag of cash so that I won't
have to ruin your life because...
(RUBY AND BILLY MOANING OVER PHONE)
Oh! Oh! Sh...
I was in your hotel last night,
and now that I've got Laurence's number...
You were my friend!
Well, I didn't expect to like you.
The money.
♪
(UNZIPS BAG)
Billy won't ever be entirely honest with you.
Remember that.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- BILLY: There you are. - Okay, so...
- Listen... - I was wrong about Alice.
- Listen, Ruby, I need to tell you something. - No, listen...
I can't do any more secret-keeping from you. Fiona, Alice,
whatever she's calling herself,
she isn't following you, okay? She's following me.
Oh, I know. (CLEARS THROAT)
Oh.
She used to work for me
and she's furious at me for ending the tour.
She was always very dedicated to her job, and now she's angry
- 'cause she thinks she won't get anything else. - Okay.
(GRUNTS) Is that all?
Yeah.
No.
I... I wasn't
totally honest with you about what happened on stage.
I, um...
Before I walked off, I told everyone,
including Jackie and her dead husband,
that they were a bunch of cunts.
And the crowd sort of turned on me,
and now there's all these online opinions
going around that I'm a bit of-of a murderer.
I gave Alice the money.
- Oh, God! - But it's okay!
- Oh, God! Fucking no! - No, Billy!
Billy! Listen to me! I've got you now,
and we're not gonna let her get away with this.
For God's sake.
We're on a train. She literally can't have gone far.
♪ ♪
- Can you see her? - No.
(DOOR HISSING)
- BILLY: Is that her? - RUBY: Where?
BILLY: There.
- RUBY: Maybe. - BILLY: Okay. Go.
No.
Hey, have you seen a...
Your other girlfriend?
She went that way.
(DOORS HISSING)
(DOOR OPENS)
Ugh!
Billy: Fuck.
There she is.
- BILLY: Go. - RUBY: Go, go!
♪ ♪
BILLY: Fuck!
♪
- (GRUNTS) - MAN: Shit!
RUBY: Sorry, sorry!
Oh, we're going to hell.
♪
- BILLY: Hang on! - RUBY: No!
Come on! Come on!
- Fiona! Can we go back... - I know you're angry with me...
- to just being normal friends? - But I need that money back!
Fuck you!
RUBY: No! Oh!
Where the fuck did she go?
♪ ♪
♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS) ♪
RUBY RICHARDSON: We're coming to get you!
- (GROANS) - RUBY: Have you slept with her?
What sort of a question is that? Of course I have.
We were working together for seven years.
It would have been rude not to.
♪ (UPBEAT MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪
Do you get the feeling like we're walking away
- from something... - (DOOR CREAKS)
Hello?
That we can never walk away from?
RUBY: I need you to go with me now.
Hi, ma'am, could you take us to the nearest station?
Hello.
♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪