You first get on the stage, and ego comes rushing in.
And it goes, "Don't mess up,
'cause you're the man.
Everyone's saying you're the man, so don't mess up."
So you get to the mic, and your first note is flat.
Always.
And then about 30 seconds in, you go...
"Oh, yeah, I'm just a guy and I love music."
And your whole body releases.
And I just let go and I look around, and I'm just like...
"Just do this.
Drop the ego.
Time to surrender."
Ever since I was about ten years old,
I was obsessed with being really good at things.
That my worth is based on what I do.
And that can lead to a dark place.
My voice hit its breaking point at the end of this tour,
-and I'm using my phone to talk.
Last night reminded me...
I'm not invincible.
Sing!
Louder!
Scream it!
No matter how fast I get, do not stop clapping, all right?
Here we go! Clap those hands! Clap!
Faster!
- Hey, uh, good one. - Thank you, brother.
Give us a hug.
-Thank you so much. - Let's go. Let's motor up.
-We've got an interview outside. - I'm not done with it.
You're gonna make a left when you come out
and go through the lights.
- Thank you. Thank you. - Bye!
I love you! I love you!
- Right there.
A little further. Right there.
Just keep an eye... I can't see the monitor...
So just keep an eye on the recording.
Hey, Cez, Jocelyn's gonna come. I told her to be here for 11:50.
All right.
So, this thing you start doing in your bedroom,
making Vines for the love of it...
Is it hard to protect that pure thing that started it all?
Come on, Shawn, let's go! Time to go in!
Get up.
As a kid, when you look at someone and you're like, "This is my dream..."
And someone goes, "That's a stupid dream,"
you'd be like, "Oh, yeah, it is a stupid dream."
When I got into school...
Ms. Parker, she was the vocal class teacher,
and I told her, "I want to be a singer.
I want to be... I want to be an artist." You know?
And she had no hesitation to believe me.
My parents, my friends...
Nobody looked at me and said, "You're crazy."
Everybody was like, "Go for it."
He sounds better all the time now.
With more practice like he's had...
Hey!
-We love you, Shawn Mendes! -I'm excited!
This is larger than I thought.
Yeah.
- Can he hear it? -No. No, no. Nothing can be heard.
He may not like being filmed. He's saying hello.
-Hi. - He can't be filmed.
- This ain't going anywhere. -Okay.
Hey, Mom?
What do you say now?
It is nuts.
What, even to go to the bathroom, he has to go with security.
- Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
I love you!
Did you see that?
-"I love you"? Holy moly.
Hi!
-You're not embarrassed of what? -I'm nervous now.
I wasn't nervous until now.
Can we go back there?
Hold on. Stay with me.
- Give it up for Shawn Mendes!
Do I have anyone from outside of Ontario?
-Where are you guys from? -Michigan.
Michigan!
Holy...
Crazy.
I think I'd heard A Great Big World, "Say Something" for the first time,
and I was like, "Wow, that's a really great song."
Googled it...
and one of the first search results was Shawn's cover of the song.
I was taken aback a bit. It was like, "This is really incredible."
Reached out, and we FaceTimed Shawn and his mom.
Immediately, Shawn just starts grilling us with questions
about how the music business works, why he might need a manager.
I just said to them, I was honest,
"I don't know everything, but I'm going to sit here
and spend every minute of my time figuring it out with you."
I would always say to him, "I need to get a band
'cause I'll sound bad on my own," and he'd say, "No.
Just get on the stage, just you and the guitar."
Having the confidence
was all based off of those first couple years of performing with just a guitar.
I went from a small bedroom in Pickering
to playing in front of a few thousand people in a couple years.
It looks so cool.
This is what it's like filming a documentary.
Here we go.
I'm not ready to give this to Scott.
He's not here.
It all stems from when I met him, and he had these cool sunglasses on.
He said, "If you had a number one single, I'll give them to you."
The first thing we did together went number one.
It needs another melody.
Yeah, it's just, like...
How's that?
Got it?
In my room, there's this thing
that has the number of shows that we're on and where we are.
Today it's at number eight, Copenhagen,
and it made me think we're not even close to 100.
But it also said Cologne, not Copenhagen.
-We're in Cologne. - It said Cologne.
-Actually, it might have said Copenhagen.
But I want us to always keep in mind that this is very special.
I'll say it, I know it'll get annoying,
but it truly is so special. What we get to do is magical.
Everyone in there, it's their first time seeing it,
every single time.
-No matter if it's show one or show 99. -That's right.
It's their first time seeing it, it's special, so thanks. Let's do it.
-Beautiful. -Let's do it.
Everybody jump!
I used to look at so many of my idols and be like,
"How can you ever be that?
They were born legendary."
That's just not the truth.
People are like, "What would you be doing if this didn't happen?"
I feel puzzled by that question,
because I feel like this is what I was going to do.
I'm in the Q&A yesterday.
This girl goes, "How do I be a songwriter like you?"
I immediately thought about saying that to my dad,
"I wanna be a songwriter." He goes, "Can you write songs?"
I said, "I don't know." He goes, "Write one."
I sat in my room and I played guitar for seven hours.
My hands bled. I'd play again and get better, and I'd practice.
And I'm not saying everyone has to be so Olympic athlete about it.
I said that to her. I was like, "Stop sitting here thinking about it.
You are a songwriter. Now, go write songs."
-Here we go!
New York!
You don't hear songs that say,
"You're just too good to be true. Can't take my eyes off of you."
Even, like, those trumpets going...
Like, all that trumpet stuff is really cool, right?
Feels, like, so, like, grandiose.
There's something about that I think about when it comes to the next album.
Something about, like, that, like...
feeling, that, like, all-around, like, overdose of love.
Could you go, "Counting back from 100, so I can fall asleep faster"?
-That's cool. -Yeah.
I was feeling like a...
Love the echo after "Hello, hello."
"All I have to do."
Yeah.
That's the one.
It sounds better without.
- Without? - Sounds better.
Again.
Okay, George, punch me on "Close my eyes".
It's pretty cool,
she rents an apartment in West Village, so we're staying there,
We wake up in the morning, like, "This is fucked."
And we have to wake up and both separately get in SUVs
to head to the same place.
- Yeah. -It's pretty cool.
I'm like, "I gotta leave at 8:30." She's like, "Me too."
It's almost like living a taste of a normal life
in the least normal-life way.
Getting all my clothes on and running to the café for an Americano.
Then you guys pulled up, and I was like, "Right, we're going to work."
- How you doing? -Good, how are you?
We go this way.
So, when I step this way, what do I do with my arm?
Boom. So this hand, when you step over... You step over here, boom.
-You look back... -Love that.
...and then you come around...
-So-- -Okay, got it.
-You're going to the other side. -No.
-All your weight is here. -Yep.
And then, you know about the outside edge...
This side?
Yeah, making sure that...
Okay. Super cozy.
-Super cozy. -Yeah.
I love you.
-Do you know that? -I know.
Thank you, everyone, good to go. Places. Let's start rehearsal, please.
We're ready to roll when you folks are ready.
Camila, she was in Fifth Harmony, and we were both opening.
My very first tour ever.
And she was the act after me.
I was first in the lineup,
with the shortest set, and then they went on.
Five years ago, man.
He was so...
super hyper-focused on what he was doing.
I never saw him the whole tour.
He was constantly in and out of his bus, playing guitar, writing songs with Geoff.
I thought he was cute, but I was like,
"He's... He's doing other stuff, so whatever."
And then, I guess it must have been about four or five years ago,
we were backstage at this Taylor Swift show.
I went to his dressing room to say hi.
And we, like, started writing this song.
And then after that, we, like, spent a lot of time with each other
because we had the song together
and we did a whole Jingle Ball tour together.
And that's really when the fucking saga started.
I really liked him.
I guess he liked me, but...
I don't really know.
For the past four years,
just being friends and not seeing each other very often
to finally being able to be together,
she was always there to look out for me as a human being.
She's got my back, and I think that's what your partner's for.
We're in New York, and my song comes on the radio or something,
and the fact comes up that it's about her.
And I'm like, "Yeah, it's about you. Everything's about you.
They've always been about you."
She goes, "What do you mean?" I'm like, "They're all about you.
Like, every song I ever wrote."
And I'm rhyming off the songs like, "Treat You Better," all these songs.
She's like, "Oh, my God." She literally had no idea.
This whole time, I thought she, like, knew.
I don't think I'll be able to write songs that really do it justice,
that can really capture the things and the feelings with her.
I think it's like when you see a moon or stars
and you try to take a photo of it with your iPhone,
and then you just can't, it just doesn't look good.
And you're like, "It's not supposed to be captured." You know?
It's just supposed to be for us.
Want to do it again for fun, stuff like that?
Play around just to get loose.
- Boom. Boom, boom. Boom, boom.
-Yeah, yeah. -Yeah, yeah.
Okay. Good. Let's sing another song.
What's a song for fun? Literally, any song, but ours.
Fuck, yeah.
Step back.
- Step back.
Shawn! Shawn!
Shawn, all the way down.
Shawn! Shawn, right here for me, man. Shawn!
Shawn, right here!
Mr. Mendes!
Shawn, one more here.
Oh, my God!
It's insane. That was insane!
That was a really calm red carpet.
I'm serious.
- That was calm? -That was calm, dude.
Wait, my, uh... My shoe! My shoe!
Oh, no!
My shoe.
Is there a proper way to do this? I swear, I'm gonna tie a double knot.
Who's ready?
Can I have water?
Come on, it's time, let's go.
At this moment in time, during the summer
of whatever you want to name this summer,
during "Señorita" and "If I Can't Have You"...
Camila and I are staying in an apartment in NYC
for the very first time alone.
And making eggs and trying to figure out how to use a Keurig.
Normal things, you know?
This is really cool, to just be, like, a 21-year-old guy.
And getting older...
That's happening for me too.
Give it up for Shawn Mendes!
Camila Cabello, everybody!
I'm nervous.
Yeah, I feel anxious to go home right now.
How long has it been?
Three and half months.
It's a long time.
I'm excited to have a couple days off and be with friends and family.
Yeah. So excited.
I'm so lucky to have a friend like Brian.
He loves them anyway.
He works hard at keeping me in the real world.
If we had our own FIFA cards, you'd probably have--
-I'd have a high rating. -You'd probably be 76 passing,
-I'd be 82. -Not a chance.
-I'd be rated a 93, you'd be rated an 87.
What's Ronaldo?
Ronaldo? I think Ronaldo's a 94.
-Yeah, I'm a 93.
Without him, I don't know, I'd probably be, like, pretty crazy.
Can you match my tone? That's my question.
He just connects me with friends from home.
I'm probably closer with my friends from home now than ever.
-Oh! -They were all supporting me
from the first time "Life of the Party" came out,
and now we're here together.
I want them to look around and be proud of it
and be like, "This is just as much ours as it is his."
"Look, guys, we made it.
How beautiful is this?"
All right, bedroom. You did me great. Thanks.
I'll see you next time.
Thank God I'm leaving you.
Double guitar.
Let's go, bro.
Good to see you, man.
-Good to see you, welcome back. -Thank you.
You rock! You rock! You rock!
Welcome.
-It's been unlocked for three months.
Let's go.
Welcome to my cozy house! It smells great in here.
Okay, everything seems right.
How's your room, Brian? Seems right?
Checks out.
Everything checks out?
Oh, yeah.
An alarm!
Fuck.
Wow, the worst shit.
Hasn't been home for so long.
This view is, like, the best view I have ever seen in Toronto.
Except for them building this gross thing. What is that?
Oh, my God, they're building a mall or something.
This is pretty cool, eh? Rogers Centre?
You can see it from here.
You can see the Rogers Centre from my apartment.
I can see it from my bedroom window when I wake up in the morning.
That's kind of insane to think about that I'm playing there.
Damn.
Hello, Mom.
-How's it going? -Good, we're just headed down.
Okay, I'm just trying to... 'Cause I spoke to Amy,
the coordinator following you, but she wasn't sure
if you were going to Whitby to get Aaliyah.
I'm headed to pick her up. I'm 30 minutes from her.
All right, babe. See you soon.
What up!
Hey.
-My daughter's a big fan of yours.
You wanna flip that on selfie mode?
Tell your daughter hi.
-Can you say hi? Her name is Berina. -Berina, I love you.
-Thanks, buddy. -Yeah, man.
Canadian love right there.
Hello.
You had a first day of school today. That's why you're in your outfit.
-I like wearing this all the time. -I didn't think about it.
Look at this shit.
Man, this is our... This is our field.
Brian and I fully, 100% climbed up that.
Swear to God.
He told you?
This is our turf, man. The turf we talked about.
-Like, this is where we grew up.
That's why when we talk about Pickering, we're obsessed with it.
Look at this.
- Yo. -Look, I brought Tainy to the turf, bro.
-No! What?
Wow.
How is it?
It's fucking great, man.
-Man, I should've came. -I know.
Wow, looks amazing.
Dude, it's incredible here right now.
When he started singing, he wasn't the greatest.
I was like, "Let's see where this goes."
It was just constant noise at my house. So annoying.
Like, it was awful.
I asked him if he wanted to be famous one day,
and he, like, shut the whole idea down so fast.
He was like, "No, I don't want to be famous. It seems awful."
I don't know if he remembers that, but I remember that like it was yesterday.
I remember I asked you when you first started singing
if you wanted to become famous,
and you, like, were disgusted by the idea.
-I was? -Yeah.
You were like, "No, I would never wanna be famous,
like, that lifestyle."
-Probably. -I remember you saying that.
You said it all the time.
'Cause... Obviously, you got good, and you started getting noticed,
so I was like, "You're gonna become famous."
You were, like, "I don't wanna be famous."
I don't remember that.
We talked about it all the time in the office.
Well, I obviously changed my mind.
I used to...
This door here...
We'd finish school off...
and everyone would come rushing down
and just hang outside on this front thing on a Friday.
Two hundred people hanging out here, trying to figure out the plans for Friday.
-It was so good. -We don't do that.
Everyone did that.
Welcome home, guys.
- I got to do homework.
Oh!
Guys, welcome.
This is my home!
Oh, my God.
So stupid.
The biggest plaque you've ever seen.
I've, like, been in every bedroom,
but this is my bedroom. Welcome.
This is the room I recorded all the Vines and stuff in.
Pretty small in here, right?
This is it, bro.
This pillow is... Fuck.
They smell good.
Mmm!
Whoa. That was actually really overwhelming.
Mom, I feel like I kind of live here again.
- He only comes here to eat. -Not true.
-Yes, you do. -What is this?
Every time you walk in you're hungry.
Look at this. Look at this sweater.
-It's Camila. -Oh, my God.
-My girlfriend. Do you know about her? -No, I don't, Shawn.
You make more money than all of us,
-and you come here to eat for free? -Oh, yeah.
- How are you? - Hey, buddy.
It's crazy. This is the most time
I've spent at home in, like, a year, probably,
in the last three days, right?
-For sure. -Every time he comes,
I try to get him to stay.
And you actually got to relax.
Usually, he comes in and eats, says, "I'm not staying long."
We might get him to watch a movie. That's it.
Christmas Eve, he stays.
He spends the night to wait for Santa Claus with Aaliyah.
-That's right. -Then they get up in the morning,
and Santa Claus has left all the gifts under the tree.
-Isn't that right? -She doesn't drop it.
-No. -Santa Claus is real.
-Yeah. -Right?
-If you believe it. -I believe.
Yeah, that's it.
-You went to the stadium today? - I went yesterday.
-It's big in there. -It's massive.
I don't want to see anything until I walk in tomorrow.
-I'm gonna be there tomorrow. -What time?
-Probably around noon. -Around noon?
In time for catering, that's why I'll be there.
-Good, good, good. Smart guy.
This is, like, something else too.
I wrote this in the green room the other day.
No lyrics.
I want to write a song that's orchestra heaven,
massive drums, and...
And then really quiet, my vocal just goes...
My car is driving itself right now.
Yesterday we were watching videos of us when we were, like, 16.
We both got so caught up in it.
We looked at each other and were like, "I don't feel good."
'Cause we were taken right back to that insecure, unsure 15-year-old.
And I just felt like, "Wow, she really understands that feeling."
We looked at each other and said, "We feel weird right now, huh?"
And she's like, "Yeah, we do."
And I'm like, "I'm so happy you know why,
'cause I don't know if I could explain this well to others."
Sounds like your heart.
Feels like my heart, yeah.
Yeah, I went through a phase where I used to write this over and over.
"I control my brain with my voice."
"I sing with no tension."
"My chest voice is strong and healthy."
This was...
two weeks before we put Rogers Centre on sale, November 24th, 2018.
I wrote... "Here we go. I will sell out the Rogers Centre."
I remember I was in this condo.
-And on November 28th... 25th, 2018. -You wrote...
- "I sold out the Rogers Centre."
That's why it worked. I wrote it in my manifestation journal.
-Yeah, it was persistent. -This is persistency right here.
You did that thing where you're...
I think Rogers Centre was always a goal of mine.
'Cause when I started playing music, I'd drive by it every day
and say, "I'm gonna play there one day."
Jesus Christ.
- Whoo! Yeah, man!
Oh, my God!
What is going on?
I don't even know what to look at.
-Where's the stage? - There.
This is crazy.
It's kind of big.
- Fuckin' huge.
This is insane!
The stage feels small.
Does the stage look small here?
Does the stage feel small? I know I can't put a new stage in, but...
-Brother, look what you did.
I walked on, immediately I was like, "Is the stage small?"
-Just take it in. -Actually feels like a city here.
Look at it.
I'm looking at the Rogers Centre, and for the first time I'm getting nervous.
On the street, the coffee guy says he's coming to the show.
My door guy at my condo says, "I'm coming to the show."
This is a real family thing.
This isn't like...
playing your biggest show of all time. It's more like,
"This is incredible. We're in his hometown.
There's so much love surrounded. He's playing a show.
It's also in the biggest stadium in the country."
I feel crazy. I've never felt like this.
I feel crazy.
It's loud.
Fuck!
Sing along!
Here we go!
For this whole year and most of your life,
it feels like you've been anticipating a show like this.
You're standing in front of a crowd of 50,000 people.
And it feels completely surreal.
It's like your feet are floating off the ground.
It's kind of pure magic from start to finish.
Everybody all together. Here we go.
I love you so much. Thank you.
I just felt like there was this real sense of love in the room that night.
Toronto, I love you so much with all of my heart. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you so much for having us.
-Great.
Manny!
I was so mad. I thought you guys left.
Oh, Shawn!
Nothing better than that, Shawn.
-Oh, Shawn, I am so proud of you. -Thank you.
-You know me, I cry a lot.
- Shawn!
Thank you!
Are we in the right car?
-Huh? -I have her vocals separate, too,
so we can pull 'em down if we need to.
-It's all over two. -Yeah.
The backgrounds right now...
What happens to me when I'm on tour is
I get obsessed with chords.
I kept playing this.
Something like that.
-Yeah. -To go from the unison to the harmony,
I'd be like, "Can't do it."
-I had to repeat it.
Most of the time I have to play the piano part into the track.
I might come in there with you 'cause it's fun.
Let's go once more.
Go again. I'm gonna take a listen for a sec.
'Cause we have this individual line function...
Yeah.
And we're missing the...
You are?
-Yeah. -You're just quiet in here.
Where are you? We'll just turn you up a little.
Yeah, we need that.
I've definitely always felt the pressure to make music that's
better than what I've done before.
I feel this time around, I'm in the studio...
kind of just being like, "Okay, whatever comes, comes."
We recording, George?
You have to not only accept imperfection but embrace imperfection,
because that imperfection in that moment is what turns into magic in the next.
I wonder what else I can do.
Maybe I'm doing a little too much on stage.
Maybe.
Maybe calm down a bit. You've also added another song.
Two songs.
Two songs, basically.
-And the medley's longer. -Yeah.
So you're working harder.
London, how you doing?
Beautiful!
I'm so sorry, guys. My voice is cutting out on me so much tonight.
I'll need your help as much as I can.
I promise to sing my heart out, but I only got what I got in my voice,
so thank you so much.
They're looping.
You tell me when you want to go.
Fucking hell, man. I just...
-What you just did just then... -No, man, I...
It's insane.
We're on a 104-show tour, and...
half of me right now is like,
"Make sure you say you're grateful," because I am.
In the biggest way, I'm so grateful.
I love these performances. I've never had more fun in my life, but...
I also want to hang with my parents, watch movies.
You're gonna do a tree at my house?
Yeah. I'll do your tree, but nothing else.
-Yeah. -...school.
Drive around a suburb, lay on a soccer field...
smoke a joint and stare at the stars with my friends
and, like, eat some beef jerky.
And, like, really, like, small-town thoughts.
You know, those things are like...
I think I miss that a little bit right now.
It's pretty intense all the time.
I really think about that a lot.
If I tell the world that I'm just a normal human,
are they going to stop coming to the shows
and listening to the music, and, like,
is all the craziness going to stop?
Then you're like, "Maybe I shouldn't tell them.
I should keep the trick up.
Maybe I should pretend that I'm Superman for a little bit longer."
Just played.
Writing a little message on Instagram.
"Feeling overwhelmed by life today.
I'm right here right now, and it's beautiful.
And it's so beautiful.
And it's so beautiful."
That's all I got for you.
I've been trying to figure it out since it started, you know,
and I have a billion different ways...
People'll be like, "Why'd this happen to you?" I have a lot of logical answers,
but none of them are satisfying, you know?
I'm constantly warming up,
and I'm constantly checking my voice out of fear of the fact that...
one day I'm going to go to sing and it's going to just not come out.
Open the back of your throat, take a deep breath.
Really loose and open.
What are they doing?
They're running 'cause they see other people running.
Dude, the show's gonna be nuts.
They're screaming.
I wonder if the band's out there.
Maybe it's 'cause I just posted the Instagram of the sunset.
Doesn't mean that I'm down there.
-Hi. -This experience has been so good.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
-I can't speak. -It's okay.
It's so nice to meet you.
Yeah.
You make me feel connected to you and connected to people around me,
and I'm just so thankful, and I...
-Oh, my God.
Should we take a photo?
When you're pulling up to a hotel in a country you've never been to,
and there's 1,000 people outside waiting for you...
no matter how many times you go through that, it feels...
like a dream.
I don't know if that's ever going to feel normal.
I don't know if that's supposed to feel normal.
I love you so much, thank you!
Thank you so much!
Thank you, Shawn! I love you!
I love you so much.
What's up, guys?
We're, uh... We're in Brazil on the last leg of the tour.
I woke up feeling...
...pretty sick today.
The day before I'm gonna play two stadiums in São Paulo.
But you know what? It's okay because...
I watched some Kobe Bryant YouTube videos and I feel great.
-'Cause I had swelling on my right cord. -Yeah, that's swollen.
Just wanna check. I have volume if I wanna bring it back.
-Okay, you'll just-- -But I just am choosing not to. Yeah.
Yeah.
Thank you so much.
Hey, how's it going?
It's going. It's going.
Just listen to this. This is...
I don't know. It makes me very nervous.
What time is it there right now?
It's 3:30.
And what time is the show?
8:30.
I don't think it's a good idea. That's my feeling.
I want to bring you to Cez,
just so you can say to him, based off of...
You're saying, based off of how my voice sounds--
Based off of that, you shouldn't even be talking.
I'm nervous that you'll hurt yourself, and then...
Can you hear me?
Yeah.
Hey.
Yeah, so we FaceTimed Nasseri in while we were in with the other doc.
So he was there looking at all the videos, all the scopes.
Everything was, like, through him.
Yeah, I completely trust what you're saying, and agree.
The truth is in the singing.
Yeah, a hundred percent.
It's there or it's not. Yeah, totally.
Okay, if you're saying it's detrimental to warm up right now,
then let's not do that.
All good. Thanks, Eric.
All right. Bye, dude.
Just so you know, I've made it very aware that we have 11 more shows after this.
If we're in any way pushing through this show to get this show done,
it'll be to the detriment of those.
-We'll have to start thinking about-- -The show scenario. Yeah.
Dr. Nasseri, it's Cez here.
I'm going to merge a call with Eric,
and you've got me and Shawn here.
So, Shawn, any improvement yet?
No.
-Five hours to show time, Cez? -Yeah, we're 30 minutes to doors.
-Thirty minutes to doors? Why so early? -'Cause it's a stadium.
Right.
I was just gonna say, we've seen people who have said,
"I'm just going to muscle through it",
and they completely hemorrhaged, and then they needed surgery.
I mean, I know it's a really overwhelming thing to cancel, but--
I'm gonna step in now and tell you
you have really no voice, we have 11 shows to go.
For an outside stadium,
you're gonna hurt yourself for the next 11.
-Yeah. - What do you think, Shawn?
I don't know. I'm not in a good place to make any decisions.
He's overwhelmed.
And just to be clear, both of you are saying
we should cancel the show, right?
- We're unanimous on that. - Okay.
Well, we'll get into it this side, and, um...
Yeah, we'll let you know on the final decision,
and then we'll update you.
- Okay. -All right. Thanks, dudes.
Take care.
See you in a bit, all right?
Canceled!
"It breaks my heart to do this,
but my doctors told me I cannot perform tonight,
or it would risk long-term damage to my voice.
I love you all, and I apologize from the bottom of my heart.
I wish I could be there on stage tonight.
I'll make it up to you the next time I'm there."
- Aw, babe, I'm sorry.
It was a great show last night.
They got to see you there, babe. It wasn't like...
you haven't been there. They've seen you.
They've experienced it.
It wasn't like you've never been there.
You told me you were sick. You had a bad voice,
but you never told me it was that serious.
It's fine. You're fine. It's not the end of the world, babe.
Take a breath.
Yeah.
You can't help it.
Love you.
You too, babe. I love you more.
You're good. You've got it.
You've got this, babe.
You know what, the fans are gonna understand.
Yeah, said you were on vocal rest. I didn't realize it was that serious.
Both of us.
It's so hard in that moment to be like, "What can you do?"
because there's 40,000 people outside.
And you just feel...
the deepest pit in your stomach.
Wow, it changes the mood real fast.
When we got to the hotel
and I was up in my room, I was so upset with the situation,
and then I heard chanting from outside.
I opened up my window,
and there was 2,000 people in the streets chanting.
And that is, like, beautiful.
Right then, I was like, "I can't even...
I can't even believe how good people are."
Just a really beautiful thing.
I was upset for a while.
I sat there in the stadium knowing I was the reason it was all falling apart.
The hardest part is feeling like I let them down.
These next 10 years are when everything I do is going full speed.
It's like an athlete in their prime.
I have to keep going.
The heaviness of the tour
made me want to flip things around and become more positive, you know?
And I'm writing about anxiety more as...
a companion I have to live with
and less of an enemy that I'm trying to resist.
Okay, can we just double that, then?
-Double that, I think it's cool. -Cool.
I'm really excited to sing these songs on tour.
All this stuff is so playable, in the best way.
I want another "Do you know" to come in...
behind it there, like...
And then another third one to come in there,
like, kind of, a little rise.
When you start an album, you don't really know what to expect.
So you just have to dive in and see what happens.
Some sort of little thing in the back there.
Yeah.
-You felt that there? -Little pause? Yeah.
Hear it now.
How are the horns sounding right now?
Is this how we always assembled?
-It's our thing. -Okay, cool.
Good times.
It's our last show.
-It's our last show. - And it's sold out.
Sold out, baby.
Oh, ho!
Why do you look so cool?
- How are you? -Fine!
-Hey! -How you feeling?
-How's it going? -Mom on FaceTime?
-She is. -Hi, Mom!
I'll flip it around.
A hundred and five shows...
The last year of my life has been this tour, and...
it's bittersweet.
It's more sweet than bitter, to be honest.
This makes me so happy, when I come into the venue,
and it's been weeks, and all of a sudden,
the "Manny" thing pops up, and I'm like, "He's coming to town."
-Hey, bro. -Hey, brother.
At the end of this tour, I'm realizing
this is something I want to do for the rest of my life.
How do you get to the end of a very, very intense year...
and want to do it all over again?
At the end of this tour,
I wish I had some profound thing to say about all this, but...
you know what the truth is?
You walk up on the stage and you look around and you think...
"I'm just a guy who really loves music.
Time to let go."
New York!
Until next time. We love you. Thank you so much for having us.
Let me record that.