[RHYTHMIC MUSIC]
[SIRENS WAILING]
[SHUTS DOOR FIRMLY]
J-Jiminy cripes. I mean, holy... I mean, hello.
I'm sorry, I should have knocked.
No, no, that's fine, that's--
[THUDS DESK] Come in. Come in!
I mean, you're in already.
Uh, have a seat. Oh, thank you.
My name is Kyra, and I, um...
[SNIFFLES] I was, um...
Jeez, are you okay?
Do you need a glass of water or something?
Yes, that would be nice.
I don't have any water. I just realized. You want, uh...
Do you want some, uh...
Gum?
No, that's all right, no. I just need a moment to gather myself.
I'm not thinking very clearly.
I'm so... I'm so frightened.
Frightened? Why?
My brother is missing, and I'm afraid...
Well, I'm afraid he might be...
I can't even say the word. Dead?
[SOBS]: Oh! - Oh, jeez, sorry!
I shouldn't have blurted that out. I wasn't thinking. Do you want some...
I should get a little fridge in here or something.
[VOICE WAVERING]: No, that's okay.
It's not your fault.
Just take your time. Deep breaths. [BREATHING DEEPLY]
[INHALING SLOWLY]
Okay, I'm all right. Honestly, I'm okay now.
Okay, good.
So your brother is dead?
[SOBBING] Oh, I'm sorry! He's not dead.
I mean, why do you think he's dead? He's just missing.
Things go missing. That's not so bad.
Your keys will go, or whatever... I can't find one of my gloves.
That doesn't mean it's gone forever and ever,
vanished into the ether, never to be seen by human eyes again.
- Oh! - Oh, I'm a jerk.
No, you're right. I shouldn't assume the worst.
That's right. In fact, you should never assume, because you--
It's just that I called him on the phone the other night,
and he was very agitated,
and he wouldn't tell me why.
We talk on the phone all the time. We're really, really close.
But this time, I asked him what was wrong,
and he just kept saying, "Don't worry."
- Well, there you go. - Well, then I called him the next morning,
he answered the phone,
but he didn't say anything, it was just this heavy breathing on the phone.
And then someone was calling his name in the background,
and then he just, all of a sudden, he whispered,
"I love you, sis," and hung up.
Holy crap, that gave me goose bumps.
Did you tell this to the police? With the heavy breathing and everything?
Well, there might come a point
where I have to go to the police, and if it comes to that, I will,
but I just want to try to get to the bottom of this
without involving the authorities.
Oh, that's never good. That's not a good idea.
It's like plumbing. You think, "Oh, I could do this myself."
And the next thing you know, there's water up to your neck
and poop floating by-- Sorry. Feces.
That's why I came to you. I know I need to get some help,
but from someone who could be a bit more...
discreet about things.
Will you help me?
Please?
Yeah. Okay, I'll do what I can.
But if it gets out of hand
and into anything weird or dangerous, then it's right to the cops,
because, uh, I can only do so much.
Okay, I understand.
So, how do we do this? Do I pay you now, or...
Uh, let's just... You know what, I have some other things
that I have to take care of at the moment.
So...
Can we meet tonight?
- Tonight? Ouch. Laundry night. - Please.
I only get the machine in my building on Wednesdays.
Please, this can't wait. It's my brother.
No, you're right. Okay, uh...
You know what, there's a pub down on Abbott Street
called the Twisted Rhino... Twisted Rhino?
No, not Twisted, Tall. The Tall Rhino.
- On Abbott Street? - No...
I mean yes to Abbott, no to... It's not Rhino. What is it?
Hip... Hippo. It's the Tall Hippo.
It's the... Tall or Twisted some kind of animal.
It's the only pub down there with an animal name.
Well, there's the Swinging Weasel, but that's a male...
8:00?
Sure. I'll see you then. And your name is Mister...
Leo. Just call me Leo. [KYRA SIGHING]
Thank you, Leo.
[DOOR CLOSING]
[EXHALES NERVOUSLY]
- So it's a missing persons case, huh? - That's about the size of it.
And at no point during the conversation
did you think to tell this woman she's in the wrong office,
or that you're not a detective, and, in fact, you're a pen salesman.
It never came up, no.
And I'm not a pen salesman, I sell specialty advertising.
Sometimes it's pens, or matches, or hats,
the little foamy beer can cozies.
Whatever you need your logo on, I can make it happen.
Oh, that's right, I forgot about the hats and cozies.
Yeah, with skills like that, you should be fighting crime.
I'm not fighting crime.
I know I should have said something, but she just kept busting into tears...
[LAUGHS]: Oh, okay, that's it.
- What? - She's good looking.
You are so shallow.
Honestly, Ernie. Who said she was good looking?
I couldn't even tell you what she looked like.
I-I didn't...
She's unbelievable. A stone-cold, gorgeous dish full of red hot fox meat
that was set under a hottie lamp until it was smokin'!
Oh, my God, Leo. Six minutes you're with this woman,
and you're in love. You fall in love like a 12-year-old girl.
Let me guess, you're probably at home
practicing writing your name with her last name?
Probably thinking about names
that you guys might have for your children.
No. Well, I've always liked Kyle for a boy.
But it's not even like that. She just seemed genuinely lost.
Like she really needed help.
And the detective guy who's down the hall--
Who's actually a detective.
He's out of town for two weeks. I heard the landlord
talking to the FedEx guy. So he can't help her.
Neither can you.
Suddenly you think you're James Bond?
- James Bond, the private eye? - Whoever.
In your world, James Bond is a guy you can hire to hide in the bush
and photograph your wife greasing the pool boy.
Whoever! I don't keep a list of detectives in my head,
in case I'm in a stupid conversation.
Well, it doesn't matter anyway, because I'm going to tell her tonight.
No, you won't. You're going to start to tell her,
then she's going to flap her eyelashes at you,
then you're going to go...
[MUMBLING]: "Oh, my God, she's a pretty girl!"
And then you're going to wet yourself.
- Give me some credit. - I am giving you credit,
because you're probably going to crap yourself.
Look, I don't care if she is pretty.
And she's not pretty, she's a smoldering tower of nuclear hottitude.
I got that.
She looks like that famous supermodel, what's her name...
James Bond. Okay, very funny.
Did you tell her about me? [LIVELY HARMONICA MUSIC]
Oh...
Well, Gator, Hippo, same thing.
Hey.
How are you doing?
I'm fine.
You look lonely.
- I'm not. - Maybe you're lonely
and you just don't know it yet.
- Ah! - I'm meeting someone,
and you two have each other, so we're covered.
Oh.
She thinks she's too good for us.
I couldn't imagine someone who isn't.
Well, I'm very curious to see your boyfriend now.
To see how pretty he is.
See how un-pretty we can make him. [LAUGHTER]
Hidy-ho. Sorry I'm late.
I wanted to get a load of whites in the wash before I left.
I tried to get Mrs. Beelman to switch nights with me,
but she just kept yelling, "No swapsies!"
Which, well, it is the rule, but, still, lighten up, Eunice.
Oh, sorry. Uh, I'll have a Scotch and grapefruit juice.
Ow. What the hell?
Stop it.
- We'll just bump into you another time. - Yeah.
You ain't even all that pretty.
I never said that I...
Did you tell them I was pretty?
- Can we just get down to business? - Yeah, um,
but I have to be up front about something...
- Right, the money. - No, it's not--
I can pay you $500 a day.
A-a day? 500 for a day?
I don't know what you're accustomed to.
It's not important. Let's get down to business.
What can you tell me about your brother?
His name is Miles. Miles Severin.
He's a computer game developer.
He designs video games for a company called Glasskey.
Okay, um...
All right, "Glass Key?"
Are you all right? I should've brought a notebook.
Like, one of those little flip-up ones they always--
like I always use on my cases.
I'll just... I'll use your napkin.
[CLEARING THROAT, CLICKING PEN]
- You ready? - Yeah.
- You sure? - Shoot.
Miles designs video games for a company called Glasskey.
He's a pretty big deal, too.
He designed a video game last year called Curseworld.
It was the largest selling game.
It sold, like, $200 million or something.
Are you getting all this?
- Not a word. The napkin's wet. - Ugh!
Thanks, this will help.
Listen, I couldn't tell you when he went missing,
but the last time I spoke to him was on the phone two days ago.
I just want to know where he is, and that he's okay.
Can you find him for me?
Okay, well, let's start first things first. What's his address?
88 Falcon Road.
North end of the city.
What?
Can I have my pen back?
Thanks. [CLEARS THROAT]
[SIGHS] Okay.
Um...
All right, well, I'll head over there first thing tomorrow morning.
Couldn't you go tonight?
Aw, man...
- Every second may count. - No, you're right. Of course.
Um, well... should we take my car, or...?
I couldn't go with you.
I couldn't take it. My nerves are shot.
I just need to lie down.
But please...
Please go tonight.
I'm so worried.
[SOBBING]
[LEO]: Well, as much as I hated to admit it,
maybe my pal Ernie was right.
Maybe I was a sucker for a pretty face,
but her skin was smooth as a boiled egg
and soft as a newborn kitten
that had been rubbed with a sheet of fabric softener
and then tossed into the dryer for 20 minutes on a delicate cycle.
Her hair smelled like lavender and fried onions,
and her breath was warm,
warm as a fat guy's armpit on a hot summer...
Oh, here we go.
[TIRES SQUEALING]
[CRANKS PARKING BRAKE]
[KNOCKS GENTLY]
Hello!
Is anyone home?
Your patio door is open!
Miles?
Your sister is looking for you!
Holy...
Holy, that's blood.
Oh, jeez, that's blood.
Oh, not good. Not good. Not good...
Not good! Not good!
[HASTY FOOTSTEPS] Not good, not good, not good...
Not good, not good, not good!
[CELLPHONE WARBLES]
[NONCHALANTLY]: Yello.
Leo? It's Kyra.
Not good! Not good!
What's not good? What do you see?
I'm at your brother's place,
and it looks like his place has been trashed.
I don't want to upset you, this doesn't necessarily mean anything,
but there was something on the floor.
Does your brother eat a lot of ketchup or spaghetti sauce?
Are you saying you see blood on the floor?
Or paint? Maybe it was red paint.
Maybe he spilled paint and then got mad, and kicked his furniture to pieces,
and went on a holiday to calm down. That's probably it. Mystery solved.
No, no, no, Leo, listen to me. Just calm down.
Do you see anything that could look like a clue as to where he is?
Okay, well, um...
I'm looking around and I don't see anything.
Mind you, I'm not there anymore.
- You left? - Yes, I left!
Because it could all be evidence for the police!
We talked about this. We are not going to the police.
We don't have to go to them. We just call them, and they go.
They have their own cars. Don't do anything yet.
I need to see you. I'm an emotional mess.
I need to talk to you at my motel.
Motel? [RHYTHMIC MUSIC]
[KNOCKS] Come in!
- The door's closed. - Open it.
- Isn't it locked? - A smart man could find out.
What kind of motel has doors that don't lock?
I wouldn't feel safe sleeping here.
[SOFT MUSIC] [KYRA SIGHING]
I mean, I could if I had to.
I unlocked it in case I was in the bath when you came.
[LAMP CLATTERING] Ow.
- You hurt your head? - No...
- Have a seat. - Okay.
Oh!
Phew, what a day, what a day...
- Leo, you could sit here on the bed. - No, this is good.
It's like being at the beach. Without the bugs.
Nope, there's some bugs.
Sit on the bed and let me look at your head.
Okay, look, if we're going to do this,
there's something you need to know about me.
You have a magnetic ass?
Thank you. Yours is none too shabby either,
but first things first...
[KYRA SIGHING] Oh.
Oh, hey! A comic book?
- Oh, it's just... - You got it wrapped up in plastic.
You a collector or something? Yeah, kind of.
It's a fairly valuable edition, so would you mind just...
All right, sheesh, I'll put it back.
[LAUGHS]: Hey! You got a hockey card, too? What a nerd.
Yeah, it's a rare rookie card.
Hey.
Who collects license plates? What's this about?
That's a souvenir. It's off a car from a movie.
Really? Cool.
Action movie, I'm guessing.
Can I look at that head of yours?
Oh.
Oh! You have a bit of a bump.
Does this hurt?
[WINCING]
- No, I'm kidding, I'm fine. - Oh...
But look, we do need to talk.
About the police? I know...
You have to believe me when I tell you I have my reasons.
Involving the police
could put my brother in extreme peril.
Is there more to this than you're telling me?
Nothing you need to worry about.
Really? 'Cause you just used the phrase extreme peril.
If you do this for me,
I will be deeply...
deeply grateful.
Okie dokey, then. I'll, uh...
I'll, uh... see what I can find...
Once the sun comes up. Great.
Call me tomorrow if you find anything.
Right.
Okay, then. [CLEARS THROAT]
I'm off.
Way off, apparently.
I'll, uh... I'll call you tomorrow.
[RATTLING DOOR OPEN AWKWARDLY]
[SNAPS LOCK SHUT]
[TURNS ON TELEVISION]
[LAUGH TRACK PLAYS] [CHANGES CHANNEL]
[MAN]: Salmon are not able to reach the spawning...
[CHANGES CHANNEL] [FILM NOIR MUSIC PLAYS]
[WOMAN]: You gotta take me with you, Eddy.
You just gotta! I don't gotta do nothing, gorgeous.
That's one of the things I like about being me.
But, Eddy, if you don't take me with you,
they're going to know the diamonds are fake.
Diamonds? Listen, luscious, this stopped being about diamonds
when my partner took a slug in the guts for being a standup guy.
It's about good old-fashioned revenge, baby,
and I'm gonna give your boss a snootful.
[GUNSHOT]
You didn't give me no choice, Eddy.
Love's love, and all that's swell,
but you shouldn't try to pin a cat in a corner.
That's funny... [COUGHS]
I always heard that about rats.
[GUNFIRE]
[TURNS OFF TELEVISION]
Jeez.
Have a good sleep.
[LIVELY MUSIC]
Okay. You know, I know you don't want to...
Okay, nobody wants to...
Because it's called a paycheck.
Okay, because it's called a job, dipwad, okay?
Like, look into it.
You know what, I got to go. Okay?
Okay, text me later.
Can you believe that guy?
[SCOFFS] What're you gonna do?
- Can I help you? - Yes, I'm here to see the big man.
- Who? - The big man. The big guy.
The big boss man.
El Capitan.
Captain Kahuna.
The big cheese... wheel.
- Mr. Horn? - Yes, Mr. Horn!
The old Hornsie.
How is the old Hornswoggle doing these days?
The old Horndog. Mr. Horn. Is he in?
No.
Ah... Well...
See ya, Jake.
Those are short shorts for a big man.
Who are you?
Who am I? You don't know who I am?
Oh, are... are you the caterer?
Bingo. That's me. Bingo Catering Ltd.
I, uh, just came by
to see what kind of event I would be catering.
That is to say, what type of event, per se,
and, uh, any allergies?
The party's tonight.
You probably should have asked these questions, like, a week ago.
Oh, no, there's actually not that much planning involved in catering.
It's a lot of improv.
So, uh, the event is tonight, and Mr. Horn will be there?
- Here. - Here. The event is here, tonight.
Okay, good, yes, yes, I can make this work.
Um, and what time is it?
- 7:30. - Great. Okay, then.
I, uh... I'll go get some hot dogs and chips and whatnot,
and I'll be back about 7:00.
[ENGINE REVS, THEN SPLUTTERS AND DIES]
- Hey, Ass-lips. - Hey, Fart-face.
- How's the detective business? - You shoot anybody yet?
Don't even laugh.
I think this might be more serious than just some missing person.
Oh yeah?
What's going on? Well, the guy is missing,
but I think he may have been taken by force.
You mean raped?
I-I don't mean... Well, who knows?
But when I say taken, I mean abducted, you idiot.
Like kidnapped. I don't like this.
That's it, I'm pulling you off the case. Time to call the cops, Leo.
It's not that simple. I made a promise,
and when I make a promise to a strange woman
wearing a bathrobe in a sleazy motel, I keep it.
Did you sleep with her?
Maybe I did, maybe I didn't.
Didn't.
What's the story with the missing brother?
His name is Miles, and he designs video games.
Video games!
I love video games.
I know you do, that's why I wanted to talk to you.
Yeah, I just bought the new Playbox.
- I thought you had an X-Station. - Now I have both: Playbox and X-Station.
Wow. I'm still using my old Nintari.
Anyway, this Miles guy designed
some hugely popular game called Curseworld. You ever--
Curseworld?!
[LAUGHING GLEEFULLY]: Oh, yeah!
Heard of it?
So I wait here, then?
Check it!
[ROARING IN TRIUMPH] You own a copy of Curseworld?
It's why I bought the Playbox, man. This game is awesome!
It's got vampires and werewolves,
and in the higher levels, it's got a vampire-werewolf hybrid that can fly,
but they still have wolf faces, and they got these claws that rip flesh,
and when they attack, they're like...
[GIVES A PIERCING SHRIEK]
Okay, real good. Thanks for the nightmares.
Yeah.
Anyway, this game made a ton of money for Glasskey.
What's Glasskey?
That's the company the missing Miles guy works for.
This is a V5 game. V5 Gaming Company.
They've been around forever.
Never heard of Glasskey.
Hmm, the plot thickens.
[LIVELY MUSIC]
...the big dog, the head honcho,
the cheesie Kahuna. Are you referring to Mr. Nelson?
Yes. Nelson.
Good old full Nelson.
Old Nelly Furtado.
Is he in?
- What is this regarding? - It's, uh, specialty advertising.
Caps and pens and fobs.
Various fobs.
Key, luggage, what have you. Fobs of that nature.
- Mr. Nelson doesn't need any fobs. - He might.
He might be walking around right now,
big pocketful of loose keys
rattling around in his pants, saying,
"These things are driving me nuts!" Then you'll have to say,
"Well, there was a fob guy in here earlier, but I sent him away. Am I fired?"
I think we both know the answer to that question.
Mr. Nelson doesn't deal with salespeople directly.
- Okay, well, who does? - I do.
And we're good, fob-wise.
Barbara, could you call Bill and make lunch for next Wednesday?
Yes, sir.
Is that him? Is that Nelson?
Bye-bye, now.
Nelson!
I'm guessing that's Nelson.
How you doing today?
Do I know you?
He's just a salesman, sir, and he was just leaving.
"Just" a salesman. That's real nice.
How would you like it if I said you were "just"
a secre... ceptionist or... What are you?
Get rid of him, Barbara,
and then come to my office.
You heard him. It's time to go.
Okay, all right.
I just want to say two words.
Miles Severin!
Who are you?
Come here a moment.
It's okay, Barbara. At ease, Barbara.
I'm just gonna go shoot the shinny with ol' Nelson Mandela here for a bit.
Hold our calls.
Now, who did you say you were?
Well, let's say, hypothetically, for the sake of argument,
that I may or may not be a private detective,
who was or was not hired
to investigate the disappearance of Miles Severin.
Disappearance? Miles is missing?
You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?
Of course not. This is a terrible shock to me.
I cared a great deal for Miles, and he will be missed.
You talk like he's dead.
Well, missed because he quit working here some time ago.
I haven't seen him since.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm a busy man.
Yeah, so am I. Swamped, actually.
You're lucky I could even fit you in today. Next time call ahead.
That was crap. [LEO GASPING]
Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to scare you.
I just... felt that I had to say... that was a total load of crap.
- What was? - I overheard the whole thing with Nelson,
about him caring a great deal for Miles, and saying he'll be missed...
Old Man Nelson hated Miles' guts.
Interesting. Why?
Well, he created our biggest selling game...
- Curseworld. - Yeah,
and Miles wanted a bigger piece of the pie.
The game was huge. It sold millions.
200 million. That's the word on the street.
That's right, so Nelson gave Miles a bonus, but that's it.
Miles told him to shove it, and he left to start his own company.
- Glasskey? - Damn straight, Glasskey.
That company is going to take
a fat chunk out of the market. Oh...
That probably wouldn't be good for this place. And you work here?
Yeah. I'm Danny.
I'm just a junior programmer around here,
but I know what time it is, if you know what I'm saying.
Word.
Uh, all right, well, thanks for the shizzle, my frizzle.
[LIVELY MUSIC]
Daddy...
Hey, babe. Excuse me.
Daddy, where's Miles?
I don't know where the hell Miles is, and why are you so concerned?
Didn't I tell you I don't want you seeing him anymore?
Did you? I don't remember.
Reese, I told you to stay the hell away from Miles.
If I find out you've been seeing him behind my back,
I'm going to be very disappointed in you.
As if you weren't already.
[MIXED CHATTER]
Ooh!
Pardon me. Hot dogs coming through.
Boy, you people can really pack it away.
Would it kill you to have a sandwich before you come to one of these shindigs?
Excuse me.
Hey...
Who's in charge of the liquor here?
I don't want my daughter getting any more booze.
I'm sorry Mr. Horn, we'll see what we can do.
Do? Don't give her any more booze, okay?
That's what you can do. Yes, Mr. Horn.
Boy, the place really looks great, with all the balloons.
I feel like I'm at the prom. Well, thank you.
Oh, it's Mr. Horn, right?
Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry, I don't recall--
That banner is fantastic, too.
Where'd you get that done? Banner-rama? Jeez, they do good work.
Yeah, no, I didn't actually decorate the place.
No, I guess you probably didn't.
I wonder if it was maybe decorated by Miles Severin?
Why the hell would Miles decorate the place?
I'm sorry, who are you?
Leo Falloon. I'm, uh...
I'm with Video Monthly Computer Game Weekly Magazine.
- You're with the press? - Yeah, yeah.
I'm doing a big story about the whole thing,
with the balloons and the grand opening and all the happenings at Glasskey.
What is happening? Right. Come with me.
I'm sorry, Mr. Falloon,
this is a private party for Glasskey shareholders only,
and I'm afraid that the press is going to have to wait for the official release.
The word is already out about Miles' new game. The press is here.
[STAMMERING IN PROTEST] Ow!
You're pinching the fatty part of my arm!
Oh... Okay, all right. Uh-huh.
Okay.
Yeah, real tough.
You're lucky I don't kick both your four-dollar-an-hour asses.
Or whatever you make... Should be more.
I'll talk to somebody tomorrow and get you guys a raise.
[MUTTERS]: Raise your asses up to your ears with my boot,
you try that again. Wow...
You showed them.
Oh, yeah. Thanks.
I'll, uh... I'll probably follow that up with a stern e-mail, too,
if I know my temper.
- Why'd they toss you out? - I made fun of Horn's party decorations,
he got all pissy. Daddy kicked you out?
Daddy?
Well, we'll show him.
He can't kick you out, because you're my date.
Ow! You're pinching the fatty part of my arm!
Oh... Okay, okay, well, this is good. I just... I have to keep a low profile.
Let's dance! Whoo! Whoo!
Whoa, whoa! Even more low profile. I already got kicked out once.
If your dad sees me in here again, he'll probably call the cops.
Ooh... you don't like cops? Are you some kind of bad boy?
No, I'm a bad middle-aged guy.
So just cool your jets, Lakita.
- My name's Reese. - It was a literary reference.
Lakita? You mean Lolita.
Oh, right. Well, if you read the book, you know it doesn't end well.
Uh-oh, security.
[REESE GIGGLES]
Wow... You really are a bad boy, bringing me into daddy's office.
Daddy's office?
Okay, I'm going to prison.
May as well wrap my head around that now
so the first day in the communal shower doesn't come as such a shock.
What are you talking about?
I don't even know anymore.
So, this is daddy's office, huh? Wow.
It's pretty nice.
[WHISTLES APPRECIATIVELY]
He, uh, strikes me as a guy who's done pretty well for himself.
You grow up rich?
Filthy.
How did, uh... How did daddy make all his money?
Ask him.
You work here too,
or you just go to the parties? I work.
I'm in the marketing and testing side of things.
Okay.
What's the word Arrowpoint mean to you?
Point of an arrow?
College girl, eh?
How about Blaster or Coldriver? That mean anything?
Wow, this is just getting funner and funner.
Let's go back out there. No, thank you.
Come on, it's a party. Not a chance.
I'll tell daddy you're snooping around his things.
I am thirsty. Is there any punch?
Daddy, how did you make your money?
Aw, crap. What are you doing with him?
I thought I asked you to leave.
No, you didn't ask. You had two rented orangutans bounce me.
Mr. Horn?
- Jeez, they're getting bigger. - Church, good. Is Miles here?
No. I went to his place, but he wasn't there.
And it looked like the place had been trashed.
- What? - What do you mean, trashed?
Trashed, busted up.
The furniture had been flipped, stuff had been broken...
Blood on the floor.
[ROOM FALLS SILENT]
It was a question. Blood on the floor? See, it went up at the end.
Did you call the police?
- Police? He's okay, right? - There's no reason to call the police.
Miles is a temperamental man. We all know that about him, right?
He probably just got angry about something, had to blow off some steam.
Mark my words, he's going to walk in here any second and be very apologetic.
I don't like the sound of this.
He's the reason I put my money in this company.
I'd better get word tomorrow that he's fine
and his new game is complete. You pigs.
All you care about is how much money Miles can make you.
Reese! Reese, come--
I'm going to send each and every one of you an e-mail tomorrow explaining everything,
but I-I want you to trust me,
there's nothing to worry about, okay? So, please,
just carry on and enjoy yourselves.
[MIXED CHATTER]
Well, that went well.
Yeah, I guess you're going to write all about it in your big article.
Oh, don't worry about me. I don't even know how to spell bankrupt.
I'll, uh... I'll head off.
[DISTANT SIRENS WAILING]
[DOOR CREAKING, CLOSING]
[MAN]: Wendyl Welding. Leave a message.
Hello, Mr. Wendyl, this is Leo calling, from Boffo Specialty Advertising.
Uh, I know it's after hours, I just wanted to leave a voice message
to say I had a bit of a delay processing your order.
I got called away on a family emergency...
Um, not my family, but somebody has a brother who...
Well, you don't need all the details, I'm sure,
but, uh, long story short, he's probably just missing.
Although there does look like there might be some kind of foul play,
or some... I'm rambling now.
Um, I wanted to assure you
I will fill your order for 250 coffee mugs
with the Wendyl Welding logo on there,
and the slogan, "Totally awesome welding", under that.
And I see we chose the Cooper italic font,
with a drop shadow, that'll be fun.
That's... fun mugs.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
Hello?
Kyra?
Leo?
Hungry?
This is a nice place.
Oh, is it? I guess. I don't know.
- It's kind of cozy. - So? That doesn't mean it's a date.
- I never said it was. - Who said it was?
- No one. - It's just two people having a bite to eat.
Two grown consenting adults,
of consenting age, having some food and consenting to talk.
You can call it a date if you need to. Relax, Leo.
- I'm relaxed. I'm completely relaxed. - Really?
'Cause you just said "consenting" five times.
Will you order me a glass of red wine? I need to use the ladies' room.
Yeah, me too. Well, not the... The men's room is where I...
But the same thing that you have to...
Well, I don't know what you have to do... I'll... I'll... You go. I'm relaxed.
I'll order the drinks.
[SIGHS NERVOUSLY]
- Hello, Kyra. - What the hell are you doing here?
Why don't we go chat outside? Move it.
- Good evening. - Hi, um, I'll have a rye and root beer,
and the lady will have a glass of red wine.
Ah, very good, sir. And what kind of wine would the lady like?
Oh, uh... Red was all the information I was given.
Um, I'm not a big wine guy.
Um... Chabonnay? Is that a thing?
Not that I'm aware of.
Savonay? Savonito?
- No. - Molay?
I believe that is a Mexican chocolate sauce.
Ooh, that sounds good too.
But you know what, I, uh... I'm going to need your help.
Could you just bring a glass of red wine? Like a nice one?
One that makes me look like I know what I'm doing?
I will pick a nice wine.
I doubt it will make anyone think you know what you're doing.
Well, I don't know what I'm doing when it comes to leaving a tip either.
[KYRA]: Why are you following me? I didn't do anything.
I am not following you.
Oh, really? I'm supposed to believe this is some kind of coincidence?
No, I think there's a lot more to it than that, so why don't you fill me in?
I don't know what you're talking about.
[COCKING GUN]
Let's bypass the whole Little Miss Innocent routine
and get right to the part where you tell me what you're doing with a private eye.
[LIVELY MUSIC]
Okay, come on, let's go, my turn. Okay...
[WINCING IN DISCOMFORT]
[SIGHS] Nope...
[NERVOUSLY PANTING]
[SIGHING IN RELIEF]
[RAISED VOICES OUTSIDE] [KYRA]:...he's just a guy I met.
I meet guys once in a while, is that okay with you?
- Kyra? [CHURCH]: Look, first, tell me
what's with the private eye, and why he's sniffing around Glasskey.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Seriously. Five seconds to talk.
One... What the hell?
Two...
[KYRA GRUNTING]
[BLOW SMACKS]
♪ Papa's lookin' for mama But mama is nowhere in sight ♪
♪ Papa loves mambo ♪
♪ Mama loves mambo ♪
♪ Havin' a fling again younger than spring again ♪
♪ Feelin' that zing again Wow! Ooh! ♪
♪ Papa loves mambo Papa loves mambo ♪
♪ Mama loves mambo Mama loves mambo... ♪
What the hell? What the hell!
She's... she's like... she's like an assassin or something!
She's... Okay, all right.
Okay, you can... you can handle this. You're on a date with a killer.
No problem. You can do this.
Just stay calm, just stay cool.
Just... just stay relaxed. This is nothing you can't handle.
[RETCHING VIOLENTLY]
[MOANING IN TERROR]
Play it smooth, just play it straight.
You're dead.
You can get through this. [TAP TRICKLING]
Yeah... She doesn't know you saw anything.
Just... play it cool.
[GROANS] And have a mint.
Hey, here I am. You miss me?
Everything go okay in the old ladies' room, where you were this whole while?
Yes, but I'm so sorry, Leo, I have to go.
I'm suddenly not feeling well.
Hey, no worries. I'm not feeling so great myself.
Got a touch of the trots.
Probably best to stick close to home tonight.
Thanks for understanding.
- Ain't no thing. - Well, no need to walk me to my car.
Didn't plan on it.
Well, okay, then.
Talk to you tomorrow. You do that.
[JAZZY MUSIC]
♪ I got a secret, baby, you ought to know ♪
♪ You need to find a girl before you can go ♪
♪ And when you're ready, baby, we'll take it slow ♪
♪ Ooh, my heart's on fire ♪
♪ And your eyes are so blue ♪
♪ And there's only one thing left we can do ♪
♪ You fan the flame when you ask me to do the mambo... ♪
It was insane.
She did, like, seven crazy kung-fu moves and some UFC stuff,
and some kind of crouching monkey, drunken panda thing.
She's like a trained killer. I gotta go to the cops.
So let me get this straight.
Before, when you didn't know she could kill you,
you were going to keep your promise to her.
And now that you know she can kill you,
you're going to break your promise to her?
How does that make any sense?
Sorry, I wasn't listening. [ERNIE SIGHING]
Look, if you double-cross her,
she's gonna chop off your head and stuff it in your mouth.
Oh, my God, you're right. What am I going to do?
Just keep doing the investigation thing.
Just keep her happy.
Whatever it takes to not make her kill you.
Or me. You've probably talked about me.
I'm in way over my head here. I don't know what I'm going to--
[CELLPHONE RINGS] [SHRIEKS IN TERROR]
- Get a hold of yourself! - You get a hold of myself.
Hello? [KYRA]: Leo.
Leo! Yep, no, I'm here.
- Where are you? - Why?
I'm just curious.
Oh, I'm, uh, I'm around. I'm out and about...
I couldn't even tell you where I am, really. I've all over the city, investigating.
I'd have to look at a street sign or something. Why? Where are you?
- Who have you been talking to? - Oh...
Uh, now's not a good time. I can't really get into it.
I'm actually in the middle of an interrogation right now.
And you're gonna talk, too!
[SMACK CRACKS] Ow! What the hell are you doing?
That's just the tip of the iceberg, you greasy sack of pus.
[SILENTLY]: Sorry.
Yeah, see? I'm working hard for you.
Anyway, I should probably get going. Leo!
Uh-oh, uh-oh! He's getting away!
Hey, get back here! [GUNFIRE NOISES]
- Leo! - Ow! You shot my leg!
I gotta go. [BEEP]
Leo!!!
[GRUMBLES]: Fine.
Sorry, dude. I gotta keep it authentic.
No worries.
Whatever you do, you've gotta keep her happy, right?
Get her some leads, you know? Uh...
Do you have any clues?
Well, I... I don't know.
Everything keeps coming back to this guy, Horn.
Horn was business partners with the missing Miles guy.
Horn has a big thug with a gun working for him. Oh, and I found...
I found this list in Horn's office.
What is this?
Clues.
Oh. Well, it's nice that they put all these clues
in a convenient list form. What are you talking about?
Well, they might be clues! I just grabbed this off his desk.
I thought they sounded like video games, maybe.
Arrowpoint. Blaster.
Well, if they are, I've never heard of them.
You should to talk to a geek, you know, someone who's super into this stuff.
Isn't that what I'm doing?
No, I mean a super-uber-geek, you know. I'm just really a part-time geek.
A weekender, really.
Oh. Well, for what it's worth,
I think you have what it takes to go full-on geek.
Thanks. You know, I guess if you work at it...
It's like anything, you gotta work at it.
Hey, I do know a geek.
Nope, these aren't any games that I know of.
Could Glasskey be making these?
I doubt it. It's a pretty long list,
and they've only got one designer. Miles.
But he's some kind of design genius, isn't he?
That's what they say.
- You don't sound convinced. - No, he's a genius, sure.
Brilliant. But even Miles Severin
couldn't be designing this many games at once.
- Especially since he's missing. - Yeah.
Yeah, what's going on with that?
I can't really discuss the details of the case,
but let's just say I'm all over it. Nothing's getting past me.
Did you dig into Nelson?
- Who? - Nelson.
The boss here, remember?
Oh, yeah, Nelson. Nelson, of course, I remember.
I just... I give all my suspects code names.
So...
He's Crimson.
- That's cool. - Isn't it?
Yeah. Oh, here comes Crimson now.
Well, hello. I see you're back again.
Or maybe you never left.
[LAUGHS] That would be funny if I never left.
If I spent the night here, going through stuff
while everybody was at home, which you couldn't prove I did.
Well, there's no need for that, of course.
We're happy to cooperate in any way we can.
We all want Miles to be found.
But this is a place of business, so...
And if you'll excuse me, I'm just heading home.
Home? It's nice to be the boss, heading home at 3:00.
Put your feet up. Maybe a little afternoon delight with the missus.
That was inappropriate.
My wife is dead.
That's even more inappropriate.
If there's nothing else.
Well, actually, there is something else, if you don't mind.
I'm just... I'm in over my head here, and you said you'd be happy to help.
Do you mind if I pick your mind for a second?
Because you know more about business than I do.
Of course. Anything I can do.
Well, if Miles doesn't show - God forbid -
what would happen to his new company, Glasskey?
Well, that depends on a lot of things.
Yeah, but broad strokes. I mean, it would be bad for them, of course.
Uh, they have investors,
so it would be bad for the investors. I suppose it would.
I can only imagine the share price would drop dramatically,
and they'd lose a bundle on the sale.
So anybody with a vested interest in Glasskey would want Miles to succeed.
So who wouldn't?
Present company excluded. Maybe this isn't about business.
There's more to life than money.
That's true.
Although, it's always people with a lot of money who say that.
Hmm.
Thanks, Danny. I'll be in touch.
Yeah, no problem. Hey, uh, how did it go with Crimson?
Good. He was actually kind of helpful.
He hated Miles a lot more than he's letting on.
Hey, what's the view ID on the connections manager?
- Why? - I need to make sure
all the clients are synchronized. Just reference the subversion log.
It's faster. Oh, yeah.
[SCOFFS] Who's the new guy?
Oh, that's J-bird. He's one of our top guys, actually.
J-bird, A-train, T-rex. Guys, this is...
Actually, do I even know your name?
Leo. With an L.
L... L-ephant? Best I could come up with.
[QUIETLY]: Hey, uh...
Are you also checking into that crazy chick who was after Miles?
Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm all over it. Refresh my memory?
Just some chick.
Desperate, crazy in love with him, but he wanted nothing to do with her.
She just wouldn't let it go.
Basically stalking the guy. Oh, yeah, yeah, the stalker.
Buttersnap. That's her code name.
Of course, her real name is...
- Reese. - Reese, yes, that's...
Reese?
Hello, Mr. Turd-whiff.
Hey, Crotch-rot, guess what? It all comes back to Horn again.
I just found out that Horn's daughter, Reese, was stalking Miles.
Hmm! I don't know what any of that means,
but you seem excited, so I'm happy for you.
It means Horn's involved in this somehow, and I'm going to find out how.
Although I tell you, I still don't trust that Nelson guy either.
Those names don't mean anything to me.
And I'm not on the case. I'm actually on my lunch break.
Break. From what?
Dusting? Look, Nelson is the head of V5.
Really? Cool. Get me some free games. [SIGHING]
What shall I ask for... Uh...
Whipwars, definitely gotta have that one.
Tankface. Ultimate Tankface 3, of course. Are you getting this?
Yeah, yeah, Whoopyfish 3. Now, listen, you're on the case as of now,
because I found out that Nelson's wife is dead,
so I need you to google around on your Internet machine,
see if you can figure out how she died, and was it anything suspicious,
because I'm getting a bad vibe from this guy.
Uh, Tankface 3, not Whoopyface...
All right, so Nelson, is that right?
V5... [TYPING RAPIDLY]
Any other details? No, that's all I got.
God, this is disgusting.
What do you wash your dishes with, margarine?
Just get a bottle of water out of the fridge.
Just see what you can find out for now, and then call me back.
I gotta go. I just had an idea.
Uh, how am I getting paid, anyway, since I'm on the case?
[DOOR CLOSING]
Do you got any bottles of water?
Do you got any big bottles?
Hey, Jake!
Did you...
wax your legs?
[PANTING]
- Can I help you? - Oh, great, thanks.
[GROANING IN EXHAUSTION]
Oh, that thing must be 300 pounds.
It's like carrying an adult pig on your neck.
Could you... put it on the floor or something?
Yeah, could you give me a second? You heard me say it was heavy, right?
[SIGHS]
Hey, I'm looking for Reese Horn's office. Is that around here?
End of the hall on the left.
Great. Okay.
[EXHALING]
Oh, hey! You can't leave this here.
I'll tell Reese where it is. She'll come get it.
Hi, Reese.
Remember me? Oh, yeah.
Tough guy. You back to fight security again?
Yeah, these are my fighting shorts.
Hey, uh, you want to grab a coffee?
No.
But you can buy me a drink.
Um, you seemed pretty upset when you heard that Miles was missing.
I know. I understand I made a bit of a scene.
Daddy was very embarrassed.
I know he was embarrassed, because he told me 100 times.
What's your relationship with Miles, if you don't mind me asking?
Depends on why you're asking.
It's just, his sister wants me to find him. She's kind of worried about him.
Oh, really.
Miles doesn't have a sister, so who's the slut that's looking for him?
- Well, she's not a slut. - Oh, you're pretty quick
to defend her honor. Is she your girl?
- No... - You wish she was your girl?
[SCOFFING] No...
Huh... Right. I don't think we'll be seeing you
winning any awards for acting anytime soon.
You don't know that.
And now you're just going to fire up a ciggy,
in here, like it's 1952,
and nobody's ever heard of the law or emphysema.
You would make a terrific nun.
- Hey... - What?
Your matches have the striking strip on the front. That is wild.
Normally, for safety reasons, the strip's supposed to be on the back.
Wow, you are really hung up on rules.
No, it's 'cause I haven't seen this since, like, the 70s.
Where'd you find these?
Never mind where I found them. It doesn't matter.
Okay, I'm just saying.
Who cares about matches?
You know, I'm tired of your snooping around, and I need to get back to work, so...
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
Matchco, the match company.
Phyllis? It's Leo, from Boffo.
Oh, hey, Leo! How you doing?
You get that catalogue I sent you? It's got some pretty cool stuff in it, huh?
Well... matches, mostly.
Yeah, but new styles.
- Not really. - Not really, no.
Listen, I'm calling with a question.
Suppose I had a client who wanted to order some matchbooks,
but he wanted to have the striking strip on the front of the matches.
- What, does he have a death wish? - Phyllis, it's--
That's not safe!
It's just a hypothetical. I don't actually--
One wrong spark, and that whole book lights up.
Phyllis, there isn't really--
You have to talk him out of it, Leo.
He won't listen. He's a crazy thrill-seeking daredevil from a circus.
So just answer the question,
does anybody still make matches like that?
Not in this country. Thank God.
Hmm. I saw a pack today.
Where would those have come from?
Best guess? China.
[RHYTHMIC MUSIC]
[NO DIALOGUE]
And voilà!
- Want a room? - Good Lord, no. I mean, yes.
What I mean is, I'm supposed to get a room
in the same hotel as a buddy of mine is in.
I just... I'm not sure this is the same hotel he's at.
Do you have a Miles Severin staying here?
We don't give out names of guests.
That's a good policy.
I could tell right away this was a "security first" type of establishment.
So, how about I just say his name,
you nod or shake your head, okay? Miles Severin.
You got a warrant?
Yes.
Good. Let's see it.
I lost it.
No warrant, no search.
Wait a minute, you think I'm a cop? Is that what this is?
That's a riot. A cop, indeed...
No, my friend, I'm no cop.
In fact, I'm supposed to meet a guy here to smoke some crack.
His name is Miles Severin, is he in, or...?
Piss off.
Regular dog, please?
- No. - Come on, Alice.
No, I can't give you a list of new businesses.
You did it for me before.
Three years ago, when we were dating. Why would I do it now?
Because you feel guilty for dumping me.
No, I feel good about that. That was a good move.
You're in denial.
The only reason you want a list of new businesses
is so you can be the first one to go out and peddle your novelty crap.
It's not novelty crap, it's specialty crap.
And this is a much better cause.
This time, you could be saving a life, or stopping a crime,
or ending a communist uprising.
I am so sure.
This is important, Alice.
I just need to know what you have
on a new company called Glasskey.
I'll owe you a favour.
Great. So if I need my name on a swizzle stick, you'll hook me up.
I could make that happen.
- If I do this, will you go away? - I could make that happen.
Okay.
[PRINTER WHIRRING]
Okay, here is a list of all the new businesses
that registered in the city in the past year.
What's the name of the one you're looking for?
Glasskey. It's a video game company.
I just need to know who owns it. Here it is.
Glasskey Gaming Inc. Owners: various.
They had an IPO two months ago.
Oh, interesting.
What's an IPO?
Initial public offering?
It went public?
Shares trading on the stock exchange?
Okay, uh, well, who runs the company?
Directors.
Two directors. Miles Severin, Terrence Horn.
And that's it? Is there any other info on that sheet?
Just look for yourself,
and please get out of here before you get me in trouble.
Thanks, Alice.
As of this moment, I forgive you.
- Forgive what? - You're welcome.
[TURNS ON RADIO, MUSIC BLARING AT FULL VOLUME]
[TURNS OFF RADIO]
[CELLPHONE RINGS] [COFFEE SPILLING]
Ow! Ow!
What? What the hell?
Oh, that's some lovely phone etiquette, young man.
Well, you scared my gonch full, you jerk. I'm on a stakeout, you know.
Jerk? You asked me to call you.
Oh, yeah. Did you find out anything about Nelson's wife?
Yeah, I found an old news story from a couple years ago.
She was killed in a hit-and-run.
- Hit-and-run? - Yup. She was, uh...
crossing the street in front of the V5 office building.
Yikes. Was Nelson ever a suspect?
No, couldn't be. He was in the V5 building at the time.
She dropped in to see him,
and then, uh... she crossed the street, bam.
No suspects. Never solved. Does that help?
- Oh, yeah, clears the whole thing right up. - Oh, hey, listen,
grab me some onion rings, will ya? To go?
Bring 'em by the house? Onion rings?
Yeah, what steakhouse are you at?
Stakeout, you bonehead! Like Emilio Estevez.
I'm watching this old hotel.
I think Miles might be staying in it,
but I don't know why. Oh, I found out some information
about his new company. It's not much, but it says,
"Glasskey Gaming Inc." There's two directors,
Miles and Horn.
The company had an IPO. Now, IPO stands for--
Initial public offering.
Their stock is offered public on the stock exchange.
Well, it's more complicated than that, but in layman's terms, yes.
Well, all right, see you later.
Enjoy your stakeout. Don't do anything stupid, Stupid.
- Hang on, what's this? - I don't know.
I can't see what you're seeing. That's not how phones work.
It says Arrowpoint. Arrowpoint...
I'm looking at this list of new businesses,
there's an Arrowpoint Holdings on here.
Arrowpoint was on that list that I showed you.
Oh!
Okay, then.
Enjoy your fat steak. Hang on, hang on.
Blaster...
Blaster Holdings.
Coldriver...
Coldriver Holdings. They're all on here!
This is a list of new businesses. And they're all holding companies.
What does that mean, Mr. IPO?
Mr. I-got-nothing-to-do-all-day- but-watch-the-Business-News-Network?
Just that, it's a holding company,
it doesn't do really do business. It just holds stuff.
- Holds what? - Assets. Real estate, stocks...
Stocks? Like shares.
Interesting. Okay, uh...
I better get back at this. I'll talk to you later.
Okay. Onion rings.
[BEEP]
Oh, holy crap, that's the big guy.
Holy crap. [PANTING]
Okay, here we go.
[MOCKING]: "Don't do anything stupid, Stupid."
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
Oh!
Well, if it isn't Mr. Private Eye.
Well, if it isn't Mr. Huge Intimidating Guy with a Gun.
I don't have a gun. Your girlfriend stole it.
Well, I don't have a girlfriend, so we're both wrong.
Let's just leave it there, call it a night.
[LEO GROANING]
Have a seat.
There's a guy down here. Aw, in a pool of blood.
Oh, not good. Not good...
I thought it was not good before, this is way more not good.
Are you calling an ambulance?
Yeah, that's what I'm doing.
Hey, it's me.
Yeah. Miles is dead.
That's Miles?
Oh, this is terrible! I mean, it's good that I found him,
I wasn't sure I'd be able to, but still, not good.
That private eye is here.
I've got the situation contained. In fact...
maybe the best thing is to leave two bodies here.
No, no, one's plenty. One's too many.
- No, we're not doing that. - Why not?
Because we don't know what he knows, or what he's already told someone else.
Bring him to the boat.
The boat... Right away. [PHONE BEEPING]
We're going for a ride.
Are we? You seem pretty confident
for a guy who just told me he doesn't have a gun,
especially considering... I do.
If you have a gun, I'm going to take it from you
and shove it up your ass.
Sideways.
Oh, are you?
Well, it's a good thing I'm bluffing then, isn't it?
Ow! You're pinching the fatty part of my neck!
Where are you taking me?
To the movies, and then dinner and drinks.
- You wish. - Well... will you look at that?
It's our old pal from the bar. I told you we'd bump into you again.
Where's your girlfriend?
Or is this him?
[LAUGHTER]
Who are these two clowns, your boyfriends?
You're all going to play the gay card? Real mature.
- Keep walking. - Whoa, whoa, whoa...
What's the hurry?
Well, I know I'm in a hurry
to see my big buddy here kick your heads in.
Shut up.
When I told him what jerks you were back at the bar,
he wanted to come down and find you guys.
- Is that so? - Yeah, yeah.
He told me to just stand back and watch,
because he was going to kick both your asses by himself,
just to make some kind of heterosexual point or something.
Well, we're right here, big man. [LAUGHING]
- You okay? - Jesus!
[GASPING IN SHOCK] Is this a Chevette?
Don't do that!
I just... I ran half a block!
- What are you running from? - This place.
[SIGHING]
[SIRENS WAILING]
That big thug that you beat up behind the restaurant was back there.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Oh, please, I saw you through the bathroom window when I was peeing.
Well, not when I was peeing, but right after.
By the way, I know you're not Miles's sister,
'cause Miles didn't have a sister,
which makes it easier for me to tell you he's dead.
- Miles is dead? - Yeah. He's lying on the floor
of that crappy hotel back there with his brains bashed in -
bashed out, actually - all over the rug,
which was a pretty gross rug to begin with. Now it's extra gross.
- Who killed him? - I don't know at this point...
Oh, my God, you killed him. I didn't kill him.
- You killed your own brother! - You just said he wasn't my brother.
Oh, yeah, I forgot.
This is very confusing and upsetting! I just saw brains on a carpet!
I'm not a killer, okay?
I'm... I'm a thief.
Oh, well, that's much better.
It is, actually. Quite a bit better.
So, who killed Miles? Did Church kill him?
Who's Church?
The guy I fought in the alley.
You know his name? What are you guys,
in some kind of super-villain fraternity or something?
He's a crooked cop. At least he used to be.
Crooked cop...
I already didn't like him. Now he's even more...
- We need to go back to the hotel. - No, we need to go to the police.
For the 100th time, Leo, we are not going to the police.
- Yes, we are. - If you saw me fight Church,
you know I have his gun, so I am calling the shots.
But you already said you're not a killer, so I know you're not going to kill me.
I could give you a permanent limp.
- I don't walk that much anyway. - I could make it
so you eat nothing but soup for the next two years.
Dammit, how did you know my weak spot was food?
Lucky guess.
Plus there's about two dozen burger wrappers on the floor of your car.
Oh, please, there's maybe eight.
Back to the hotel.
It's clear. Good, because I don't want-
Oh, he's right there! It's not clear at all. - I meant it was clear of Church.
[LEO SIGHS]
Well, it wasn't clear what you meant by clear.
[LEO SIGHS]
What are you looking for?
A laptop or an external hard drive.
- Is that what you want to steal? - Maybe.
Yeah. By all means, keep me in the dark.
It's not like I'm involved.
[SCOFFS] Another comic book nerd.
Do you want to steal these so that you can...
Wait a minute, that comic book in your motel.
That was Miles'! You stole Miles' comic book.
What, are you gonna tell the teacher? I already told you I was a thief.
[KYRA SIGHS] I went to Miles's office.
He wasn't there, so I cracked his safe to see what was in it.
As anyone would.
The comic book and all that stuff was in there.
Hold it, why would you steal that?
Because it was in plastic, which means it's valuable.
Unbelievable.
"That's a very rare rookie card."
That license plate probably isn't even from a real movie, is it?
How should I know?
You're a thief and a fibber.
I know, shameful.
You know, a lot of these hotels have Bibles in the nightstand.
Why don't you steal one of those and read it? You sinner.
What's that?
I don't know. It says D-D-A-Y-S-P-M.
Maybe it's a password.
Well, the hard drive is obviously not here,
which means Church took it when he killed Miles.
We have to find Church. Well, I know who he works for,
but it's doubtful they're kicking around the office this time of night.
Wait a minute, Church said something on the phone.
He said, "The boat, right away."
What boat?
He forgot to fill me in.
There's, like, 5,000 boats moored around the city.
Follow me.
I saw this place in a photo in his office. In whose office?
Your big ugly buddy is working for the head of the video game company.
What?
That son of a bitch was setting me up.
- What? Who's setting you up, Horn? - Who?
Horn. The head of Glasskey.
Right, and you figured him and Church are here?
Yeah, maybe. What's this about a set-up?
We just have to be very careful.
Oh, yeah, good point.
Okay, uh, you go ahead, and I'll wait here.
You're just going to sit here and think about what your favourite soup is?
See, first you say be careful, and then violent threats.
I'm getting mixed signals from you.
Which boat is his?
I don't know. I'm trying to remember the photograph.
It had a sail on it, I think. Very helpful.
Was it boat-shaped?
I believe it was.
Oh! Oh, oh, oh!
- Is that him? - Yeah, that's him, that's Horn.
I have to see if he has the hard drive.
You wait here.
No, thank you, I'm waiting here. Oh...
She must go to the gym.
[KYRA YELPS]
[TABLE SMASHES] [KYRA SCREAMS]
Oh, no.
[GROANING AND STRUGGLING] Who the hell is that?
This is the one I was telling you about.
The thief who's working with the detective.
What exactly are you trying to steal?
I think you can guess.
Why don't you save us a little time and tell us?
Why don't you save me the trouble of kicking your teeth in and let her go?
This is beautiful. You're even stupider than I thought.
Yeah, well, thoughts probably aren't your strong suit.
- You're becoming more annoying every day. - I know.
Kyra's going to be annoyed with me too, because I called the cops. Sorry.
Brave, Leo, but you didn't think this through.
They're going to kill both of us before the cops get here.
I'm betting they won't.
So far, they're just a con-man and a goon-for-hire.
That doesn't carry the same sentence as murder.
But they're already guilty of one murder.
I don't think they are. Am I right, Horn?
This whole thing got way out of hand,
but I didn't kill anybody, and neither did Church.
I bet you don't even have the hard drive either, do you?
If you did, you wouldn't have asked Kyra what she was here to steal.
If I did have the hard drive, I'd be tempted to kill you both.
But you don't have it, right?
Sadly, no.
So what, that's it? We're just going to wait here for the cops?
What do you suggest, Church?
We have a boat and two hostages. They'll have to let us go.
Where are you gonna go? Tell me. Where do you want to go, Church?
The States? Mexico?
I'm not spending the rest of my life on the run.
Then this is where we say "so long", Horn.
Nice working with you, but I'll be taking your boat,
and I'm taking your girlfriend for insurance.
She's not my girlfriend. Did you say you were my girlfriend?
She can't say much right now. She's busy blacking out.
- Let her go! - You guys better get off the boat.
She just might get to breathe in the next couple of minutes.
Horn, move!
Have a good sleep.
[GRUNTING]
[SIRENS WAILING]
[ENGINE ROARS]
[GRUNTING]
[SIRENS WAILING]
[ENGINE STARTING]
Come on...
You've gotta be kidding me.
[GRUMBLING]
[LEO, WHISPERING]: Kyra?
Kyra?
[COUGHS AND SPLUTTERS] Nice.
Kyra...
Kyra, if you're conscious,
I need you to go up top
and beat the shit out of Church again, okay?
[KYRA MOANING]
Okay...
Okay, you rest.
I'll go get killed.
Okay, turn around.
Very good. Now turn the boat around.
I said, turn the boat around.
If you have to turn around so that you can turn the boat around,
I'll allow that.
[SHUTS ENGINE DOWN]
[IGNITION BEEPS OFF]
I told you before,
if you had a gun, I was going to shove it up your ass.
Yeah, but you don't want to do that. This is your gun.
I have to have it cleaned anyway. Your girlfriend took it in the water.
It's too wet to work.
Oh, is that a fact? Well, it just so happens,
I was down in the cabin drying it in the microwave,
so it's good to go, my friend.
I'm going to make you prove it.
Well, if that's the way you want to--
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]
[DOOR LOCKING]
[LOCKED DOORKNOB RATTLES]
[LATCH SNAPS]
[BLOWING]
[WINCING]
[SMACKING LIGHTLY]
[HEAVY THUD]
Kyra!
Are you okay? Are you okay? Can you walk?
- I'll try. - Okay, hang on. Hang on.
Okay.
[GROANING] [SPLASHING OUTSIDE]
Yeah, I see... I see him. Does he see me?
[SHIP HORN BLARING]
Great... [PHONE BEEPING]
Ah...
Hey, big fella. How's your head?
You probably don't even remember me punching you.
I gave you one quick pop in the yapper, and you went out like a newborn.
Actually, you're lucky I hit you with this one,
because this one would've totally--
[LEO SCREAMING]
[MAN]: This is the police!
Come to the portside and put your hands in the air!
[SIGHS]
Ah! You know, this is a quality fob!
The Velex 2000 series.
The letters are thermal-raised,
the ring is double-spun, the body is polystyrene,
so it floats.
Oh...
Must be the 1000 series.
Yeah, my office is on Pender. I'm there almost every weekday.
They arrested Horn and Church. How come they didn't arrest me?
Oh, yeah... I forgot to tell them about you!
Oh, well, no rush. It's not like you're going to kill anybody.
How did you know they didn't kill Miles?
- Because I think I figured out who did. - Who?
Well, at first, I thought it was Nelson,
because Nelson had all the motive in the world.
He had a big fight with Miles.
Nelson hated Miles for leaving the company,
and he hated him for starting a rival company.
So how do you know he didn't do it?
Because if Nelson wanted Miles dead,
he would've hired a killer instead of a thief.
I'm imagining you in a red Corvette. That's pure speculation on my part.
- You mean you knew? - Hang on.
Now I'm imagining you in a tube top.
You were onto me the whole time.
Hardly.
I didn't know anybody hired you for anything,
until tonight,
when I said something about the head of the video game company.
That son of a bitch set me up.
Who? Horn?
When I said the name Horn,
you acted like that was the video game guy you were talking about.
Is that him?
But you didn't know him, so it must've been Nelson.
Hmm, aren't you smart?
It always said "smart" on my report cards,
usually followed by the word "ass" or "mouth".
So if Horn didn't want Miles dead, what was all the cloak and dagger?
Fraud. I think Horn
was screwing over his investors, and I think Miles was in on it with him.
One year from now, we're all going to be a lot richer.
[LEO]: See, Horn got everybody all jacked up
about this exciting new video game that Miles was developing.
Then, they issue an IPO.
Now, IPO means initial public offering-- I know what an IPO means, okay?
What moron doesn't know what an IPO is? Anyway...
The stock was red hot, and everybody bought in.
Then, they staged Miles' disappearance.
They even made it look like he might have even been hurt.
He wasn't there. It looked like his place had been trashed.
[LEO]: No Miles, no game.
Everybody wants to sell their stock, and the share price plummets.
So how does that help Miles and Horn?
They buy all the stock back at the deflated price.
Only that would look suspicious, right?
So they did it through separate holding companies.
Arrowpoint, Blaster, Coldriver...
Then suddenly, Miles reappears, stock prices skyrocket, they make a fortune.
Yeah, that was their plan. Only Miles failed to reappear.
Well, in any useful way.
I still don't get who killed him.
All right, okay, I'm getting to that.
Jeez, I go through this whole rigmarole.
Give me that little moment at the end where I get to say how I solved it.
Anyway, through the course of my in-depth investigation,
I kept having conversations with this guy named Danny.
Nelson really hated Miles.
Nelson hates Miles more than he's letting on.
He was super keen to load me up with a bunch of different suspects.
Check out this crazy chick who was stalking Miles...
[LEO]: But the kicker was
when we found that note in Miles' hotel room?
D-D-A-Y-S-P-M.
Does that mean anything?
I didn't get it at first, but earlier in the day,
Danny had introduced me to some of his coworkers.
J-bird, A-train, T-rex.
I spent all day trying to come up with a nickname like that for my name.
L... L, uh...
Ella Fitzgerald. L... El-eanor Rigby.
I think that's why it dawned on me later. That note didn't say D-D-A-Y,
it said D-day!
J-bird, T-rex...
D-day. Danny!
[KYRA SCREAMS] When I looked at it like that,
then the S-P-M kind of stood apart, and I realized it's not an S, it was a 5.
D-day Danny was coming to Miles' hotel room at 5:00 p.m.
- What for? - I think that Danny was doing
all Miles' design and computer programming for him.
See, earlier, Danny went out of his way to kind of downplay his abilities.
I'm Danny. I'm just a junior programmer.
But it was obvious he was their best programmer.
No, the gipsum-gibble is the blander-fandle and the happa-blappa is a skippy-doodle.
Or words to that effect.
Why would Danny do all that work for no credit?
Well, I don't think he had any choice.
See, once I figured out that you stole all that stuff from Miles' safe--
- I told you I stole it. - Regardless.
It got me thinking. Comic books can be valuable,
sports memorabilia can be valuable, but when is a license plate valuable?
Nelson's wife was killed in a hit and run outside V5.
They never caught who did it.
Well, it's valuable if it's used in blackmail.
I bet if we give that license plate to the cops,
they run the number, they find out it's registered to Danny.
I'm not going to the cops.
Uh... maybe you should look around.
I'm a thief.
I can't get tied to this.
Well, I know that, but maybe if you laid low--
Leo...
You know where the license plate is.
I have to disappear.
Well, maybe you could disappear for a little while,
and then, later, you could come back, and...
And just like that, she was gone.
Sometimes, to this day, when the wind blows,
I can still smell her perfume in the air.
What do you mean, to this day? Didn't this all go down last night?
I was being poetic.
More like pathetic. It's just been a couple hours.
You can probably still smell her perfume on your shirt.
Maybe. She made me miss laundry night.
Yeah, so the woman I told you about said the license plate was in here.
And why would she tell this to you?
She raises a good question.
Well, I, uh, I don't know, exactly why.
I think maybe she came into my office by mistake.
See, there's a private detective's office
on the same floor as mine, so... And what is it you do?
Oh, he sells foamy beer hats and fobby whatnots.
- Who are you? - This is Ernie.
He's unemployable due to mental shortcomings,
which is probably why he has all those unpaid parking tickets.
Or did you pay those? No? Not yet?
Here it is.
Oh, look at that. Uh, I think, if I remember,
she also said there was a hockey card, and a comic book or something, down there?
If I... if I remember correctly from our brief encounter.
Nope. Just this.
Ah. My mistake.
Curseworld was my design,
and I had to just shut up and watch him take all the credit for it.
And he was forcing me to create his next game, too.
So you went to his hotel,
and instead of doing his work, you killed him.
What? Miles is dead?
- It's a little late for that, pal. - No, no, Miles... I-I did not...
I did not kill him. Danny Carwyn,
you are under arrest for the murder of Miles Severin.
No... I thought this was about the hit and run. I didn't kill Miles.
No! No, please, no. I-I did not. I did not do this. Please!
Please, this is a mistake!
Hi, tough guy. [BUMPS HEAD, WINCING]
Reese. What are you...
How did you know where I work?
Oh... I was kind of a bad girl.
I followed you back here once. Why?
I don't know. You just intrigued me, I guess.
Oh. Well, that's very flattering, but, look, I'm twice your age.
[GIGGLES] You're funny.
And, yes, I'm funny.
I'm probably a hell of a lot of fun to be around, but still--
I'm not attracted to you, silly.
I was interested because you were asking a lot of questions.
You scared me with those matches.
You knew I was at Miles' hotel, didn't you?
Um... no. Who's Miles?
You're a nut.
A nosy little nut who squirreled his way into somewhere where he did not belong.
Whoa! Whoa! Where is everybody getting guns?!
This is Canada! I got this off Miles.
He carried it around because he was afraid
someone was going to try and kill him at work.
Ah... Guess he wasn't worried about me, though.
You killed Miles.
He hurt my feelings!
Oh, well, fair's fair. Even Steven. Back to work, everybody.
Not yet.
You know about me and the matches...
No, no, I don't know anything!
Plus, I'm forgetful. It's Barbara, right? Brenda?
See? I couldn't even tell the police if I wanted to.
[GUN COCKING] Which I don't, P.S.
I have to be sure.
[REESE GASPING, GRUNTING]
Who the hell are you?
Is this your slutty girlfriend?
You told her I was your girlfriend?
No, I didn't... She said that I was.
That... I mean, you was. Were. She lies.
And plus, she killed Miles.
You told her I was a slut?
I told her you were not a slut. I defended your honor.
That's true. He did defend your honor.
Shut up!
[BLOW THUDS, REESE YELPS]
[KYRA SIGHS]
Well, I guess you better call the cops.
I keep telling you, we can't go to the... Wait, you keep telling me.
Call them.
Make sure that other kid doesn't get locked up for two killings.
Oh, yeah.
[DIALING] [MAN]: 9-1-1, what's your emergency?
Hello, yeah, somebody just tried to shoot me, with a gun.
And I think she killed somebody else too. So could you send somebody over right away?
Am I supposed to stay on the line? They'll call back.
Wow, Leo.
You almost had this whole thing figured out,
except for one little detail, the killer, but that's not important.
Yeah, I-I caught a different killer.
Yeah, not bad. And if you wanted to,
you could actually become a real detective.
Wait a minute...
Well, if you knew, why did you hire me?
I don't know.
There was something about your face that said,
"Here is a man I could easily manipulate."
Oh, really. Well, it was my face that made you think that,
so who's manipulating who?
And then I thought maybe it would be better to hire someone who wasn't a detective.
Less chance of them catching on to what I was doing.
Oh... So you decided to stay with the stoogey dope the whole way.
Except...
you weren't as stoogey or dopey as I thought.
Well, you are pretty stoogey, but not dopey.
Yeah, I walk a fine line.
So... here we are.
I, uh... I didn't expect to see you again so soon.
I mean, I'm not complaining. Your timing was fantastic.
Yeah, and to be honest, I didn't expect to see you either.
I dropped the money in the mail slot,
and then I thought... you should probably have these too.
I'm getting out of the thief business.
Wow! Well, that's great!
Good for you.
That's very cool.
So, uh... what are your plans?
Ah, damn it.
Damn what?
Oh!
Nothing.
I just... I bit my tongue. Damn it.
Damn my fat tongue.
- You thought I left, didn't you? - No!
I-I didn't.
Yes, you did.
I didn't care one way or the other.
You're a terrible liar.
I don't think I'm a terrible liar.
I'm probably just not as practiced at it as you are.
[TELEPHONE RINGS] And now who's calling?
- It's probably 911. Pick it up. - Oh, yeah, right.
Yello!
♪ I'm not the guy who cared about love ♪
♪ And I'm not the guy ♪
♪ Who cared about fortunes and such ♪
♪ I never cared much ♪
♪ But look at me now ♪
♪ And I never knew ♪
♪ Technique of kissin' ♪
♪ I never knew ♪
♪ The thrill I could get from your touch ♪
♪ Never knew much ♪
♪ Oh, look at me now ♪
♪ And I'm a new man ♪
♪ Better than Casanova at his best ♪
♪ With a new heart brand-new start ♪
♪ I'm so proud I'm busting my vest ♪
♪ So I'm the guy who turned out a lover ♪
♪ So I'm the guy ♪
♪ Who laughed at those blue diamond rings ♪
♪ One of those things ♪
♪ Oh, look at me now ♪
♪ I'm a new man ♪
♪ Better than Casanova at his best ♪
♪ With a new heart brand-new start ♪
♪ I'm so proud I'm busting my vest ♪
♪ So I'm the guy who turned out a lover ♪
♪ Yes, I'm the guy ♪
♪ Who laughed at those blue diamond rings ♪
♪ One of those things ♪
♪ Oh, look at me now ♪
♪ Oh, look at me... ♪
♪ Now ♪
Subtitling: CNST, Montreal