[Narrator] Since the dawn of man,
the vampires have walked among us, killing, feeding.
The only one with the strength or skill
to stop their heinous evil is the Slayer,
she who bears the birthmark, the mark of the coven.
Trained by the Watcher, one Slayer dies
and the next is chosen.
And I shall be his sword.
Let Satan tremble.
The Slayer is born.
Keep, keep it comin'
Dance till you can't dance
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you can't Dance till you can't dance no more
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all
Dance till you just can't dance
[Man Rapping] Feel the fury of the one-of-a-kind
Any rhyme I say, A-OK, that was a dope rhyme
Change the pace of the flow Yo, be smooth is the rhythm
This is what you get This is what I'm givin' uptown
Get down to the funkyjam To slam the funky jam
Yo, rhymin' offbeat is Q Unique
Dancin' up your girlfriend 'cause I dip her sweet soul
Shake, shake, shake your groove thing
As I pick up the mike and make the crowd swing
Well, what do you know? Kids want total control
Hey, you, leggo my eggo [Chorus] Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you can't Dance till you can't dance no more
Go, go, go
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you just can't dance
Go, go, go Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all
Dance till you can't Dance till you can't dance no more
Go, go, go Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you just can't dance Go, go, go
[Man] And when the bass-drummer makes the big slam
In case you didn't see me here I am, trash it
Industry nothin' like a jackal
The name I have a tackle, a snap, a crackle, a pop
'Cause the not you know it's mine
Rate, rate, dover-weight Come back
Another date, nuff said Here I go, here I go Here I go
Grab me up I'm gonna blow I'm gonna blow
Okay, people, they're psyching you out.
Let's not be so defensive out there, okay?
What do we say on the court? Repeat after me.
"I am a person. I have a right to the ball."
Good. All right, here's our key play.
We're gonna... Are we the X's or the O's?
We're the O's. Oh. Oh, right. Okay.
Did you catch what I was sayin'? Me neither
I just wanted to catch a quick breather
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you can't Dance till you can't dance no more
Go, go, go
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you just can't dance Go, go, go
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you can't Dance till you can't dance no more
Go, go, go
Keep it comin' Keep it comin'
Keep it comin', y'all Keep it comin'
Dance till you just can't dance
[Cheering]
Mr. Howard is so heinous. [Scoffs]
He's always giving me a hard time.
I get a C-plus on the test, and he tells me,
"You have no sense of history."
I have no sense of history? He wears a brown tie.
You got a C+? I can't believe I cheated off of you.
[Sighs] Excuse me for not knowing about El Salvador.
Like I'm ever going to Spain anyway.
Oh, wow. Look at that jacket.
Oh, this is so lush.
Wouldn't you guys just love me in this?
Guys, what's the sitch? I'm bored.
What do you think?
Please. It's so five minutes ago. Yeah.
Oh.
What are we doing? Oh, I don't know.
Why don't we go see a movie? Where?
Omniplex? Nee sitch. No way.
No THX. They don't even have Dolby.
Sorry. Beverly Center.
Oh, please. They show previews for foreign movies.
Yeah. AMC?
Bogus corn. Bogus corn.
Totally stale and the ushers are, like, the acne patrol.
Totally. Okay, okay.
How about we're thinking... Pavilion? Sitch solved?
Sounds toasty. We're going to the Pavilion.
Cool. Excellent. What's playing there?
I don't know. It doesn't matter.
Excuse much. Rude or anything?
Nice ensemble.
What a homeless.
[Chattering, Laughing]
Is Jeffrey really spending the night at your house? [Movie: Man Screaming]
That's the plan. Ooh, what a sitch.
Your parents are always going away for the weekend. You're so lucky.
[Boy] Hey! I guess.
Mine don't. I'm gonna die a virgin.
Would you guys shut up please? [Man Screaming]
It could happen.
[Girls Laughing] God, what a 'tude.
Boo! [Imitates Buzzer]
It's the Loch Ness monster!
God. Take a chill lozenge.
Like we don't have rights too.
Ignore them, okay? Ignore them.
Oh, no, no. I can't believe these people.
We paid good money to see this. No, we didn't.
[Girls Laughing] Oh, yeah.
[Boy] Look at the streets. They're all lining up for me
because I am the champ! [Stereo: Rock]
Whoo! Hey, look at the moon, man. It's a huge moon.
Guys, we gotta do something tonight. We gotta go out and party!
If you spent more time at home sleeping,
you'd spend less time on the court sucking.
You were a bonehead out there yesterday.
Anyway, I'm booked.
Gotta spend some quality time with the little lady.
Excuse me. You pig.
Pushover. You're such a pushover.
You guys are pathetic. I'm blowing. Andy, you coming with me?
No, I'm gonna catch a ride with Jeffrey. Later.
Slam dunk. Later.
[Continues]
[Inaudible]
Jeffrey, I don't wanna sound sexist or anything, but can I borrow her?
Andy! No way. You'd get her dirty.
He would, honey. He's an animal.
See you at my house.
Don't look.
[Animal Howling In Distance]
[Coughs]
[Faint Snarling]
Oh, man.
I'm not in the mood for this.
Okay, whoever's behind me better be gone when I turn around.
What are you, some kind of weirdo or something? Huh?
[Snarling]
The apparent cause of death was a severe neck wound
that resembled, in the words of one bystander, "a really gross hickey."
In a related story, the body of the third slasher victim, Jason Doofey,
has disappeared from the morgue.
Oh, there it is. Have fun. Be good. Stay away from the Jag.
I know.
That's everything.
Bye. Kiss noise.
Bye-bye, Bobby. Bye!
Another victim was found today, the fourth.
And Lulu just can't get pregnant. [Continues Speaking]
She thinks my name is Bobby?
It's possible she thinks my name is Bobby.
Real quality-timer, huh?
Mmm. Something like that.
Yeah, it works for me.
I mean, if they wanna leave you alone in the house,
all helpless and vulnerable...
Well, the weather hasn't disappointed us.
Constant sun and temperatures in the high 70s
have made every winter's day a beach day.
[Snarling]
[Grunts]
[Snarling]
[Groans]
Oh, please! Show me a real Slayer.
Lothos.
Will you people never learn we can't be stopped?
[Laughs]
[Thunderclap] This is our world now.
Wow.
[Sighs]
Mmm.
Sleep, my master, my own. Sleep.
I have already begun building you a new family.
Soon we will be legion.
When you rise, we will claim this place as our own.
Rubies will drip from your lips.
Soon.
The environment, I'm telling you, it's totally key.
The Earth is in terrible shape. We could all die.
Besides, Sting's doing it. I thought he was doing Indians.
How about the homelesses? Um, move.
Aren't there any sicknesses that aren't too depressing?
Hi. Hey there.
What you guys doing?
Senior dance. We need to come up with a theme.
A socially conscious theme.
Yeah. "One that reflects the students' growing awareness of,
and involvement in, the world around them."
[Jeffrey, Andy] Downer!
I still say the environment. That's my suggestion.
Yeah, me too. Yeah, that's a good one.
What are the most immediate threats
to the world environment right now?
Um, litter? [Andy] Litter. Yeah.
Forest fires?
Bugs?
Bugs. Totally. Yeah, I hate bugs.
Yeah. [Andy] Cassandra, write it down.
Guys, what do you think about the ozone layer? [School Bell Rings]
Yeah. What about it? What?
Yeah, we gotta get rid of that. First bell, people.
Time marches on.
What's your point? Button it, Kramer.
[Cassandra] Let's meet tonight, okay?
Café Blasé? Oh, cool.
We can, like, figure decorations and stuff. Yeah.
I don't know, guys. I really wanna get a head start on my homework.
[Laughing] I love that one.
[Jukebox: Reggae Pop]
Buff, I don't see why we have to invite every single senior.
Because it's a senior dance. Just a shot in the dark.
[Jennifer] So? My usual.
[Nicki] Like, why do we have to invite Nadia? She's such a blemish.
I know. You're right. She is.
Hi.
What?
I thought that look was over.
Well, it's retro.
Yeah, retro.
You can borrow it sometime.
Okay, maybe I will.
We were talking about the senior dance, in case you're interested.
[Whispering] You guys, look who's coming.
Ew. Make me sick. Ugh.
[Girls Laughing]
What does it look like?
Two coffees or a hot dog.
[Waitress] Nothing on it. Nothing inside.
[Quietly] Losers.
I'm Charlotte. I'll be your waitress.
Thanks, Charlotte.
You guys are thrashed.
[Girl] Just a little. Are we?
[Girls Laughing]
That would explain the slurred speech.
Thanks. What's your name?
Buffy.
Yeah, it figures.
I'm Pike.
This is Benny.
[Clicks Teeth]
And I'm... I'm... Pike.
Pike isn't a name. It's a fish.
[Laughing]
Don't we know you guys?
Hey, wait a minute.
You're the guys from the movie.
We hate you guys.
Like we care, I'm sure.
Yeah. Boo-hoo.
[Girls Laughing]
[Muffled] You guys were very rude, okay? It was shocking.
You just snuck in anyway.
Yeah.
Hey, Buffy. You hungry? I got something for ya.
[Girls Shriek]
[Slicing]
Oh, man, she wasted my dog.
[Groans]
[Pike] I'll have it running in about a week.
All I need is some brake pads,
shocks, some tires, new engine, maybe.
[Benny] It'll be totally cherry.
When you get that car together, man, let's bail, get out of this town.
Those rich bitches, they're a plague. They gotta be stopped.
What, you didn't like 'em? Give me that.
They're all the same. They're just so stuck-up.
It's like they're not even human. I hate 'em.
Yeah, but would you bone 'em?
Yes, definitely. Definitely. Please, God. Especially the blonde.
Ooh, I'd give my right eye for a piece of that.
Wait. She's not even human.
Yes, but her yabos scoff at gravity.
Oh, man, you're disgusting.
You don't even like her and you'd sleep with her. What is that?
I got a news flash for you. Another shot of this, and I'll have sex with you.
Oh, yeah. Then you'll never call me.
[Benny Groaning]
I think I'm gonna ralph.
Oh, hey, Benny, I'm here for you, man.
I'm here. [Laughs]
I'm here for you, Ralph. [Laughs]
Aw, man. [Laughs]
[Snarls]
[Grunts]
[Sinister laughter]
This is not a very safe place for you to fall asleep.
Okay, Mom. [Grunts]
[Man Grunting]
[Buffy] Okay, dribble.
[Singing] Shoot, shoot
Take that ball to the hoop, hoop
All right. Yeah. That's cute. I like that.
Bye. See ya.
I was thinking, for the senior dance, what if we made a big sign
that says, "Don't Tread on Me"?
You know, on a picture of the Earth.
How do you not tread on the Earth? You kind of have to, right?
Oh. Yeah, I never thought of that. Yeah.
I gotta bail. You coming?
No. You guys blow. I'm waiting on Cassandra.
She's gonna help me with my history. Wait, wait, wait.
[Sighs] I kind of loaned her Kimberly's yellow leather
jacket, so don't tell her, all right?
Okay, I won't. See ya.
Bye.
[Gasps] God!
You scared me to death. Where the hell did you come from?
That was very impressive, the... the... the tumbling.
What?
Oh. I used to do gymnastics.
Are you looking for somebody?
I was looking for you actually.
Why? Am I in trouble or something? 'Cause if I am, I didn't do it.
[Chuckles] No, you're not in trouble. I am. I'm years late.
You should have been taught, prepared.
But I wasn't certain until just now that it was you.
What are you talking about?
I'm saying that I've been searching everywhere for you, Buffy.
Why?
To bring you your birthright.
My birthright?
Is... Is that like a trust fund or something?
I think it will be easier for you to understand this birthright
if I show it to you.
All right?
So you come with me now to the graveyard.
[Groans]
No. No, no, no.
My trust fund's in the graveyard?
God, what's your damage?
Buffy?
[Exhales] You're one of those skanky old men
that attacks little girls and stuff, right?
Well, forget you.
My name is Merrick, and you have been chosen, Buffy.
[Exhales] Chosen to go to the graveyard?
Why don't you just take the first runner-up, okay?
Everything depends on you, Buffy.
You must come with me now to the graveyard while there's still time.
Time to do what?
Time to stop the killing, to stop the vampires.
All right. Let me get this straight, okay?
You want me to go to the graveyard with you
because I'm the "Chosen One" and there are vampires?
Yes.
Does Elvis talk to you?
Does he tell you to do things?
Do you see spots?
Spots?
Yes, of course. That's your proof.
Spots.
You bear the mark.
You bear the mark of the coven.
What, that big old hairy mole?
Ew. I had that thing removed.
Besides, you knowing about my big old mole doesn't prove anything.
Except for it's way past medication time for you, buddy.
So why don't you just stay away from me, okay?
Do you ever dream that you were someone else, Buffy?
Everybody does.
No, someone in the past.
Someone real.
A Magyar peasant girl perhaps.
An Indian princess?
A slave?
I was a slave.
In Virginia.
I... I don't know.
There was, like, this big farm or something.
There was this one where there were these knights and I'm a...
A servant girl. A barmaid.
Oh, my God.
I never told anybody about this.
There's this one where there's this man.
I think he's a man. He's in my dreams sometimes.
I'm fighting him... Always fighting him. [Laughs]
But he's so strong.
His name is Lothos.
How do you know all this?
Because it is your birthright, and I am a part of it.
You come with me to the graveyard,
and I will show you.
[Owl Hooting]
I can't believe I'm doing this. [Animals Howling]
I can't believe I'm in a graveyard with a strange man,
hunting for vampires on a school night.
Ew.
Why did you never tell anyone about your dreams?
Oh, right. Tell everybody I'm crazy? Beauty idea.
Ow!
Cramps?
None of your business. God! This is it.
Robert Berman was killed three days ago,
and his body was found in the bushes by the canal.
Extensive tissue damage.
Tearing at the neck and shoulders.
Take these.
Wait a minute. No, no. You won't have to do anything.
They're just for your protection. Sit there.
I just need you to watch.
[Exhales]
All right. What do we do now?
We wait for Robert Berman to wake up.
Do you have any gum?
[Sighs]
No.
[Sinister laughter]
[Rustling]
[Gasps]
[Roars]
[Shrieks]
Buffy!
[Merrick Grunts]
[Cackling]
Behind you.
[Snarling]
I fought the law and the law won
I fought the law and the
[Instrumental Solo] [Knocking]
Pike.
Ben?
Where you been, man? I tried to call your house like 50 times.
I've been hanging. Hanging?
You left me hanging. I almost pulled a Hendrix.
Come on. Let me in. This weird guy gave me a ride home.
I thought he was gonna hit on me.
Come on. Invite me in, Pike.
Wait a minute, man. What's wrong with you?
I'm fine.
You look like shit, man.
Well, I feel pretty.
[Laughs]
You on something?
No.
[Laughing]
Let me in, Pike. I'm hungry.
I fought the law and the law won Go home, Ben.
I'm hungry.
You're floating. Come on, man! Get away from here!
I'm hungry.
I'm hungry! I'm hungry!
[Laughing]
Now, Buffy,
you go to school tomorrow and act normally.
Don't let anyone know you know what's happening. This is important.
Because once the vampires find out who you are,
you won't be hunting them anymore.
You understand? They mustn't know your name.
All right.
Meet me at this address tomorrow after school.
I have cheerleading practice, okay?
Well, you're going to have to skip it.
They can't come in unless you invite them in. Is that true?
That's true. Mm-hmm.
Good.
[Engine Starts]
Do you know what time it is?
Uh... Around 10:00?
Oh! I knew this thing was slow.
You pay a fortune for something...
Honey, come on! We're gonna be late!
[Panting]
Wake up, sweetie. You'll be late for school.
Are we having a nightmare, Cassandra?
He knows you're awake.
Your heartbeat sounds out to him like thunder.
Oh, my God.
[Sinister laughter]
Who are you?
[Sinister laughter]
[Jennifer] Oh, hi. Wow. You're late.
I'm gonna practice. Cool. See you out there.
Okay, bye.
[Gasps] Oh, God!
What are you doing here? This is a naked place.
You were supposed to meet me an hour ago.
I told you that I have practice.
And I told you to skip it.
Listen, I think there's been a big mistake, all right?
I appreciate that there are real vampires and that you're on this big holy mission,
but obviously somebody read their tea leaves wrong 'cause I'm not your girl.
And I don't think I'm up to it.
And just between you and me, neither do you.
It is true.
You have missed years of training.
See?
And you are undisciplined, frivolous.
Don't I know it.
Quite probably the most vacuous choice in my entire...
Okay. Okay. I think we both get the point.
Right.
Then I don't think there's anything more for us to say.
I guess not.
Good luck and all.
[Girls Cheering In Distance] Oh, yes.
There is one thing.
What?
This.
Bravo.
[Gasps]
You... You... You threw a knife at my head.
Yes. I had to show you.
But you threw a knife at my head.
And you caught it. Only the Chosen One could have caught it.
Don't you get it? I don't want to be the Chosen One.
I don't want to spend the rest of my life chasing after vampires.
All I want to do is graduate from high school,
go to Europe, marry Christian Slater and die.
It may not sound too exciting to a scone-head like you, but I think it's swell.
You come along and tell me I'm a member of the hairy mole club,
so you can throw things at me?
Buffy, it was necessary.
Last night, you knew I was sitting in a fresh grave, didn't you?
Yes, because I had to make you aware of the implica...
[Groans]
Oh. Wow.
[Groaning]
I... I never hit anybody before.
[Muffled] Really? Well, you did it perfectly.
I didn't even break a nail.
[Pop Intro]
Yeah [Grunting]
Yeah
I admit you got the biggest brown eyes [Yelling]
And you know how to bite your lips to tantalize
Sure
Yeah
You can get any girl you want going And you do it
And don't say you don't know 'cause you do
Well, baby, I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
So quit it
I love you, I love you I do, boy
But you ain't gonna cheat on me
I need you, I need you I do, boy
Choose Is it her or me?
[Yells] Yeah
Just 'cause I have a say input
You should be ashamed of what I've been seeing
Yeah
You better watch your step or, boy, you're gonna lose
The best thing you ever had
Oh, oh
I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
[Yelling] I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
So quit it Ha!
[Fades]
The heart. Remember?
So when do I meet this guy Lothos?
I don't know.
When he comes to you in your dreams, what does he do to you?
How does he make you feel?
He, uh... He scares me.
Well, I think we can safely say
that there's something going on with you, Buffy.
Now, there's nothing to be nervous about.
You're not in any kind of trouble.
Don't think of me as Gary Murray, administrator.
No. Think of me as Gary Murray, party guy,
a happenin' dude who can talk to the young.
So tell me. It's drugs, isn't it?
Hey, I know where you're coming from.
[Insect Buzzing]
Believe me, I've had my drug experiences.
Oh, yeah. I did a lot...
Well, some acid in the '60s.
[Buzzing] See, I was at a...
I was at a Doobie Brothers concert,
and I could see the music flowing into, flowing into me.
It was bright red and electric.
And I... I felt like I was a big, uh, a big toaster, you know?
[Buzzing] And I thought, "Well, maybe I am a toaster,
and we're all molecules."
My friend Melissa, her head looked like a big party balloon,
and that... Boy, whoo-hoo, that scared me.
[Buzzing Stops]
Then I, uh... I... I started to freak out.
You said you'd have the part by 2:00.
Christ, it's almost dark.
What nasty bug crawled up your bungus? Where the hell are you going?
I'm leavin', man. I'm bailin' town.
This place has gotten way too hairy.
Where the hell am I gonna find a mechanic stupid enough to work for my kind of money?
Seen Benny lately?
No. [Grunts]
Hey. Why, you want me to give him a message?
You should think about leaving too, man. Sell this place.
There's something going on around here.
I don't know. Something real weird.
Hey, what do you want me to do if I see Benny?
Run.
Nice night for a walk.
God, it's cold,
dark.
[Singing] Feelings
Whoa, whoa, whoa Feelings
Boy, I'm feeling really helpless
Oh, God.
[Groans] [Creaking]
Wait.
Hello?
[Gasps]
[Groans]
[Gasps]
[Stopwatch Clicks]
Toaster-kicked him.
It was a trap, get it? I led him in.
It was a blind alley, get it?
If there'd been any more of them, you would be dead by now.
You must never forget the cardinal rule, Buffy.
One vampire is a lot easier to kill than 10.
Does the word "duh" mean anything to you?
You felt sick, didn't you?
You had cramps?
Nice conversationalist.
Yeah, I felt them a little.
But I'm not due for another couple of weeks, since you're so hot on the subject.
Of course you're not.
It was a natural reaction on the part of the Slayer.
A reaction to their unnaturalness.
And you're going to be able to use that to track them.
Great.
My secret weapon is P.M.S.
That's just terrific. Thanks for telling me.
It's not a weapon. It's an alert system.
Well, aren't we kung fu. I don't see you out there killing any vampires.
No, I play my part.
You can play with your part all you want, but it's my neck on the block.
I'm out there risking my life.
I'm risking my life, and you're not doing anything.
I train girls to be Slayers.
I have done so for a hundred lives,
and I shall continue to do so.
I am born each time with the knowledge
that my purpose is to prepare the Chosen One
for her battle.
I am not a Slayer,
and I must not interfere even if I want to,
even if I think that this time the girl
is truly exceptional.
So, uh, what... What do you do?
I mean, you just keep on living the same old life over and over?
Yes. Yes, until...
What, until there aren't any more vampires? Then what?
Oh, then maybe I'll go to heaven.
[Scoffs] Or maybe you'll just get a job.
Oh, a job. I would have been a wonderful boot-maker.
That is so dull. I'm going to be a buyer.
Of what?
I don't know.
It's just a job I heard of. It sounded pretty cool, you know?
Buying, buyer, to buy.
I like that.
We should go to work.
Yeah. Quick, before anybody has any fun.
Merrick, I'm not gonna croak that easily.
I have something that the other girls didn't have.
And what might that be, pray?
My keen fashion sense.
Oh, vampires of the world, beware.
[Laughing] Merrick, you made a joke.
That's good.
Are you all right? Do you wanna lie down?
I know it hurts for the first time, but...
it was a good joke.
[Engine Cranking] [Pike] Come on, baby. Come on, baby.
[Engine Dies]
Come on.
[Engine Cranking]
This is not my night.
[Sinister Laughter]
[Engine Cranking] Come on, baby. This is for the money.
Make me proud. Come on.
[Cranking] Okay, come on.
[Engine Starts] Yes. All right.
[Tires Squealing] [Pike] Excuse me.
[Snarling] [Yelling]
Get off my car, dude.
[Man Singing, Indistinct]
Come on. [Sinister Laughter]
[Gasps, Screams]
[Screaming]
[Horn Steadily Honking]
[Honking Stops] [Groaning]
[Snarling]
[Pike] Oh, give me a break.
You ruined my new jacket.
Kill him a lot.
[Sinister Laughter] [Grunts]
[Groans]
Hi. Uh...
Is that your van? Yeah, it was, just somebody jumped...
[Snarls]
[Vampire Groaning]
Interesting choice.
Last-minute decision.
Sorry about your guitar.
Hey, you're that weird guy.
Oh, yeah.
You've been hurt. Oh, no.
You know what they say? Any one you can walk away from is a good...
You know this guy?
Well, somewhat.
He's rather fond of passing out just as I happen by.
You doin' all right? You okay?
Yeah, I'm good. I, you know, kinda miss my knees though.
You want some water or anything?
Kitchen's in here. Nope. Got it covered.
[Exhales]
So you do this a lot? I mean, it's like a hobby for you?
Ow! Not exactly.
They were vampires, weren't they?
[Sighs]
Yeah. God! Vampires. Unbelievable.
[Ice Rattling]
You had a carful of stuff. Were you leaving?
Yeah, I was bailin'.
I got this friend, and he's really...
Well, he's really a vampire, I guess.
It's not a good scene. It's a bad scene, and tomorrow I'm on a bus.
I'm outta here.
Wow. Are you okay?
No, I'm fine. Um... You sure?
It doesn't hurt.
Okay.
Who are you?
I'm sorry, but you seem like such a flake.
And I mean that in a good way really.
It's just, you know, hey, I can keep talking until you strike me dead or not.
I prefer not. Things are kinda confusing.
I'll buy that.
Three weeks ago, all I could think about was...
I didn't actually think about anything,
but I definitely didn't expect this.
You know what it's like when everything is suddenly different?
And everything you thought was crucial seems... Seems so stupid.
[Scoffs] You find yourself
babbling incoherently to a strange man in your living room.
Are you calling me a man?
Um, I'm gonna go to bed.
If you want, um, to stay,
you can stay in the guest room.
Nah. I'll stay right here.
Make sure the sun comes up and everything.
Okay.
I know what it's like.
Hmm.
You fool.
You left the others behind because of a little thing like this
on their first kill.
He took my arm.
It was your own fault.
Reckless imbecile.
The City of Angels is ours for the taking, but you...
1,200 years old...
You behave like a child.
I had him in my grasp.
Cheer up.
You may still.
Do something about that arm. It looks horrible.
Honestly, I don't know how you made it through the Crusades.
I'll be in my chamber...
[Cat Mewing]
Having a little snack.
[Hisses]
And now they found Cassandra's body in the hills.
I know. It'd been there for weeks. All icky.
It's awful. It's awful.
She still had my jacket. [Gasps] The yellow leather?
You didn't get that back from her? Oh, I'm so sorry.
[Kimberly] I loved that jacket.
They're having some kind of memorial service or something tomorrow.
You goin'? I don't know.
Coach says I gotta work on my abs.
Oh, gotta get some... Whoa!
[Girls Squeal] [Grunts]
Whoa! Whoa! I'm sorry.
I'm sorry! I don't actually need any right now.
Hey, what is it with you? Don't grab me, okay?
Absolutely. I see now the error of my mistake.
Hey, keep your hand off my "thang." I'll pop you one.
Did he scare you? I can take care of myself, all right?
So I noticed. [Andy] Yo, Jeff.
[Scoffs] It's nice to feel needed. [Clears Throat]
Let's move out! Yes!
I've missed three practices already.
If I'm not at that game tomorrow, everybody's gonna start talking.
It's just another distraction. It isn't right.
[Sighs] Why, because it isn't my fate?
It isn't in The Book of All Knowledgefulness
that I'm gonna be cheering at the Riverview game tomorrow?
Lighten up, Merrick.
None of the other girls ever gave me this much trouble.
And where are they now? Hello.
Therefore, if we all work together, together it'll all work out.
Are you with me? Now get out there!
All right! Score some, uh, points.
Hey, wait. You missed practice again today.
I think you better sit down and think about how that made me feel.
[Whistle Blows]
Share it! Go, team. Go.
[Chuckles] Rah!
[Laughs] [Whistle Blows]
[Buffy] Ready? Okay.
[Together] How funky is your chicken?
How loose is your goose?
Our goose is totally loose
So come on, all you Hog fans
So come on, all you hog fans and shake your caboose
Whoo! And shake your caboose
[Whooping] [Fans Cheering]
[Girl] Two, four, eight... [Whistle Blows]
Murph, come on out. This is it. You're in.
And remember, you're special.
Thanks. All right! Assert your personhood.
Actualize! Actualize! [Buzzer Sounds]
[Chattering] [Coach] Share it! Extend your auras!
[Whistle Blows]
[Coach] More polite! More polite!
Stagger them with your politeness.
I'm open! Grueller, I'm open!
Aha! That'll show 'em.
[Humming] [Cheering]
Coach, we can't have this. That's not right. We gotta get him out.
It is reprehensible, but the points count, right?
Get him out. Yeah. Okay.
[Snarls] Ugh!
Take it, man.
Grueller? No.
Will you go get him out?
Aha!
Grueller's pretty much abandoned the concept of zones.
[Snarls, Hisses]
[Boy] There's a girl on the court! [Groans]
[Growling]
[Hisses, Snarls]
[Merrick] Buffy! He knows who I am!
Yeah, the gearbox... Hah! [Laughs]
Hey, Eric. Must be halftime. [Grunts]
Oh! Hey, babe, You wanna get some real power between your legs?
[Growling] [Buffy] Yeah, I do.
[Groans] [Motorcycle Revs]
Dyke! You're a dyke!
[Laughing] I'm telling the world!
[Bikers Laughing]
[Panting]
[Buffy] Grueller! Grueller!
Come on!
[Pike] Buff!
[Groans]
[Creaking]
[Grueller] Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm!
[Gasps, Groans]
Ha, ha.
[Groans]
Someone get an ouchy?
Grueller, it's me. Remember me? Buffy.
We used to hang. My birthday party?
You drank all the blueberry schnapps and looged on my mom?
[Snarling] You were my friend.
Now I'm a god.
[Grunts] [Groans]
[Thud] [Groans]
And now you're a coatrack.
[Grunting] Oh!
Geek.
[Snarling] Ooh! Here we go!
[Groaning]
Look! Air. Huh? [Groans]
[Vampire Groans]
Hi. Hi.
What are you doing here? What am I doing here? I'm saving your butt.
Well, there was sort of an exchange of butts.
At least I didn't faint.
Pike, you shouldn't have come back.
What am I gonna do, run?
[Chuckling] Where am I gonna go?
These guys are everywhere, and I wanna do some damage.
I'm good with damage.
I better find Merrick.
I didn't expect to see you so soon.
I know that guy. That is a bad guy. Can we go, please?
[Lothos] Has our time finally come?
Have you ripened so fast?
Come closer.
Look at me.
Does anybody here have a problem with this but me?
[Hisses]
[Heartbeat Pounding]
Come into my eyes. Yes? [Pike] Hey.
Hello!
This is not a caring nurturer.
This guy's a bloodsucking fiend from beyond the grave.
Will you be wagging that jaw of yours while I'm biting it off?
Are you addressing I?
[Lothos] Who's ready to stop me?
It's not you, Merrick.
You finally brought me someone real,
but is she ready?
Actually, she's quite a pain in the ass.
What a pity. [Pike] Your move, Merrick.
Come on, lefty.
You remember what happened the last time you messed with me.
I remember.
Shit!
Aaah!
[Groans]
She's not ready for you, Lothos.
That's too bad.
I had such high hopes.
Close your eyes.
No!
Not this one!
Lothos.
[Grunts]
[Groans]
Ashes to ashes.
[Gurgles]
Oh, look.
Look what I've done.
Aw. [Sobs]
Dust to dust.
We're leaving.
We're not eating? She's not ready.
[Groaning]
Oh. Stay still.
I am still.
[Groans] I'll get some help.
[Coughs]
You...
You do everything wrong. [Chuckles]
Sorry. No.
I take it back. [Chuckling] No.
Do it wrong.
Don't play our game.
Lothos is a...
is a show.
Remember about the music.
Listen.
When the music stops,
the rest is...
Merrick?
Merrick!
Oh.
It really was mondo bizarro. Oh, please.
When she ran out into the court in the middle of the game,
wasn't it the most out-of-it thing ever, or did I blink?
No. Way mental.
Oh, hi, Buffy. Hi, guys.
You were supposed to be here at 3:00.
Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. I forgot.
Buffy, what is your sitch?
You're acting like the thing from another tax bracket.
It's too weird.
Listen, a lot's been going on, guys, okay?
And I really wanted to talk to you guys about it.
See, um...
A couple of weeks ago I met this guy.
Oh, my God. You're having an affair?
Cool! Does Jeffrey know?
It's not about that.
He's, like, old. He's 50.
[Together] Ew!
Sick! [Jennifer] Gross!
Haven't you guys noticed what's been going on here?
The strange things?
Haven't you noticed people disappearing, turning up dead?
What are you talking about?
Weird? You mean like hanging out with that homeless Poke?
Pike.
[Gasps]
Ew! You're having an affair with him?
He doesn't look 50.
Guys, I think reality stepped out of here
about five minutes ago. [Kimberly] Oh, thank you very much.
Yeah, like you've got a grip. You're so out of it.
Jennifer says you've blown off cheerleading and now dance committee?
Excuse me for having something important to do.
And this isn't important?
This happens to be the dance.
[Buffy] Right. It's a dance.
It's a stupid dance with a bunch of stupid people that I see every stupid day.
[Scoffs] Like, now we're, like, stupid?
You know, Buffy, this doesn't happen to be just any dance.
It happens to be the last dance of our last year.
Except for the semiformal.
Right. Oh, and the totally formal.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah, and the senior prom.
Okay! Look, Buffy, if you wanna play house with the unwashed masses,
that's fine, but personally,
I think you should spend a little time prioritizing.
I really do. Yeah, what language are you speaking?
Get out of my facial.
[Nicole] Well... [Scoffs]
I guess you got what you came for.
Nic. [Nicole] Later for it.
[Departing Footsteps]
Jen.
Buff!
Hey, Buff, whatcha been doing? I've been looking all over for you.
I'm going shopping. Don't try and stop me, okay?
Cool. I need some Allen wrenches. What do you need?
Dress. For what?
Dance. Come again?
I'm going to the senior dance.
Second word sounds like "dance."
I'm going to the dance. For what?
In order to dance, drink punch, be with my friends.
¿ Comprende? No, I don't comprende.
Here the world is under attack by legions of the undead...
You're going to a mixer. It's not a mixer. It's a senior dance.
It's important. You wouldn't understand. No, I wouldn't understand!
I thought you wanted to kill vampires.
I don't want to kill anybody.
I don't want to talk about this anymore.
What about Merrick? Is that what he'd want? Merrick's dead.
Cheap shot.
He's dead because of me.
Because I couldn't lift a hand against Lothos.
I'm in way over my head.
Look, life's a bitch. I'll give you that.
But, Buffy, you're the guy.
You are the chosen guy. Right.
I'm the Chosen One, and I choose to be shopping.
Yeah, I should have known.
Just leave me alone, all right?
You know, Benny was right. You're all the same.
I'm not disappointed, just angry!
[Tires Squeal]
[Shutter Clicks]
Buffy? [Laughs]
[Sighs]
[Whirring]
Buffy.
Lay out my suit.
We will be attending a dance. Dance?
Master, what are we waiting for?
The Slayer is unmasked. Let's finish it.
We'll wait until Saturday. Why?
Because I... [Chuckles]
Want to dance.
[Rock] I'm yours to command.
[Laughs] [Laughs]
[Man] I'm taking you to the silent city
[Laughter Continues]
Underneath the broken stones
I was hoping for eternity
Here among the dirt and bones
You lovers hand in hand
Enjoy your time together while you can
Ow. [Whistles]
[Ends]
[Chattering, Whooping] [Techno Dance]
[Laughing] Nice outfit.
This one doesn't have a mirror at home. Shh! [Laughs]
Have you seen Jeffrey?
If I say no, are you gonna hurt me?
No. No.
Shh!
Hi, guys. Hi.
Have you seen Jeffrey?
'Cause, uh, the limo didn't show up,
and I thought maybe he'd be here.
What?
[Laughing]
Jeffrey, there you are. Buffy, what are you doin' here?
I thought we were gonna come here together.
I'm here with Jenny.
[Giggling]
I don't get it.
Come on, Buff. You know what's going on.
It's not working out at all.
Gotta move on.
I got needs too.
I told you about all this.
No, you didn't. Didn't you get my message?
You left me a message? You weren't home, like always.
You broke up with my machine?
I'm outta here. Jenny!
[Snaps Fingers] Jenny! We're leavin'.
[Rock Ballad]
[Man] Opened my eyes
Fire had come
Not for the end of days
Not for the faithless ones
Not for vision understood
Burns because it has to burn
Change will happen
Whether we
Are still or moving
[Vocalizing]
Breathe in waves of doubt
Bitter in your mouth
You will exhale cinnamon clouds
[Gasps] God. Pike. [Laughs]
I, uh... I crashed your party.
How shallow of you.
Yeah, well, I'm... I'm pretty shallow.
I'm glad you came.
Well, you seem to be having a swell time,
you know, the queen of the cardboard jungle.
Would I get my ass kicked if I asked you to dance?
Drown in waves of doubt
Maybe.
Touch me inside out
And I will exhale
A primal shout
You know, Buffy, you're not like other girls.
Yes, I am.
And I understand
The fire will come
Not for the strength of will
Passion of anyone
Not for the end of days
Not for the faithless ones
[Ends]
[Rock]
[Man] Into the night, I gotta go I can't believe it.
When the juices start to flow
Everything will be all right
[Screaming]
[Shouts] Is somebody kidding?
Everything will be all right
Oh, man. There are vampires out there, man.
Oh, my God!
Okay, nobody go near the door!
[All Laugh] Party time.
Don't worry. They can't come in unless they're invited.
I already invited 'em.
They're seniors. [Vampires Snickering]
[Boy] Buffy! You wanna dance?
[Girl] Master wants her.
We want her. We want Buffy.
Send her out. Or we'll come in.
Hey! I have detention slips here, and I'm not afraid to use 'em.
[Vampires Chattering, Laughing]
We got a problem.
I got a bag full of solutions. What are we gonna do about it?
You're staying here.
Come on. What? If any of them come in here,
it's gonna turn into a total stain.
Yeah, you say it like it's a bad thing.
It's a good thing one of us is prepared.
I'm not gonna let you go out there by yourself.
Don't piss me off.
Wait. Buffy! [Material Rips]
Hey, Buff.
Party with the animals
Party No dogs allowed
Party Party with the animals
Party No dogs allowed
Party Party with the animals
Party No dogs allowed [Laughing, Growling]
[Groans]
[Grunting, Groaning]
Everything will be...
It's okay. I think they're goin' after her.
I like it loud I like it mean
[Kimberly Screaming] [Grunts]
[All Snarling]
Buffy! Jeffrey, wow.
That was quick.
Run, Buffy. Run!
[Snarling] Ew!
[Grunting]
[Clamoring]
Look out, dude! Party with the animals
[Grunts]
[Groans] [Girl Screaming]
[Gasps] [Snarls]
[Groans] Hi. How's it going?
[Grunts] [Groans]
I'm fine, but you're obviously having a bad hair day.
Oh, funny. [Groans]
[Rock]
[Laughs] Aaah!
[Clamoring Continues]
[Grunts] [Groans]
Or she could go for what's behind door number three. [Chuckles]
[Growling]
[Grunts]
[Screaming]
This party sucks, man.
[Groans]
Come on, come on. Fight like a man.
[Snarls]
[Growls]
Isn't it great, Pike? Isn't it great?
Finally got those bitches on the run.
[Screaming] [Laughing]
You know, honestly, I leave you alone for five minutes,
and look who you're hanging out with. [Coughing]
But it doesn't have to be that way.
I could still change you. Gimme a break, Benny.
[Gagging] Why do you like these people?
They're sheep.
Aw, forget them. Live forever.
We could start a band.
[Screams]
[Panting]
I'll get you, Buffy, and your little dog too.
I just don't know what he sees in you.
You don't really think you can stand up to him, do you?
Admit it, Buffy.
Aren't there times when you just feel less than fresh?
[Grunts] [Groans]
[Grunts] You're pathetic.
You're not even fit to die for him.
We're immortal, Buffy. [Groans]
We can do anything. [Grunts]
Oh, yeah? Clap.
[Violin]
[Grunts] [Groans]
[Resumes]
You're gonna wish you'd died. [Groans]
Ooh! Ahh! Ow! Ooh!
Ooh! Ahh! Ah...
Ahh! Ooh! Uhh!
[Moaning]
[Groaning]
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah!
Ahh! Ooh... [Violin Ends]
You know this is our night.
I do.
It was good, wasn't it? What?
Killing him.
So intimate.
Your first real kill
and my last gift to him.
[Grunts] Where is she?
She's meat for the beast. Master wants her.
And Uncle Sam wants you! [Laughs]
[Screaming]
Things change, Ben. What's up with that, Pike?
[Heavy Rock]
[Rock, Muffled]
It's time
to put away childish things.
[Benny Screaming]
[Screaming Fades] [Generator Powering Down]
Silence.
What?
Look at me.
"The rest is silence." That's it. What?
Merrick told me. I knew it all along.
The music stopped.
Look at me.
It's too late.
You and I are one.
One what? Cute couple?
I don't think so.
You and I... Look at me.
You and I are joined.
We're joined?
Please.
You stupid little bitch!
[Groans] How you gonna stop me?
I am life
beyond death,
and you are just like the other girls.
Maybe I'll surprise you.
This is your defense?
Please.
Your puny faith? No.
[Hisses] My keen fashion sense.
[Gasping]
Detention.
Detention. Detention. [Chattering]
Detention.
Detention. Detention.
I think that's all of 'em. Nope!
Detention. Detention.
[Andy] Hey, look. It's Buffy.
Buffy? No! No!
Don't let her in. They'll kill us. Please keep her out! No!
Buffy. I didn't think I was gonna see you again.
Are... Are you all right? [Panting]
Oh... Get out of my way.
What? Find my friend Pike.
[Shouts] [Clamoring]
I'll have you beg.
Split open like rotted fruit, all of you.
That is definitely not a student.
You are my destiny.
I could never hurt you.
[Groans]
I am gonna send you screaming to the pits of hell.
Hah! Trust me!
[Laughs]
[Grunts] I haven't finished with you, bitch.
[Both Grunting]
[Laughs] [Grunts]
I got him!
[Both Grunting]
[Groans]
Well, I had him.
No, no, no, no, no. Sorry.
[Grunts] [Groans]
[Choked Voice] Now... I'm really pissed off.
Good! [Groans]
Oops.
[Sword Clatters On Floor]
[Grunts]
Oh, God. [Murmuring]
Pike?
Pike.
Oh, I used to be.
Sorry. [Exhales]
You okay? Yeah, I'm all right.
Are you okay?
I can't move my legs.
Why? 'Cause you're sitting on them.
[Both Laugh]
Okay, come on. [Groans]
I'll help you up.
[Siren Blaring]
Wow.
Did I do all of that?
No.
[Sighs] Did you do all of that?
Yeah. Yeah, I did.
[Boy] She's way out there, man.
[Girl] I don't know. I think she's kind of cool.
I, uh...
I saved you a dance.
You gonna ask me?
[Siren Blaring]
I suppose you wanna lead.
No.
Me neither.
This is a good thing.
[Rock: Mid-tempo]
[Engine Starts] [Woman] Close our eyes
Close our eyes and dream
And the world has turned around again [Buffy Laughs]
Oh, oh
When everybody
Is running in the big race
And havin' a good time
Who am I to cast a shadow?
Who am I?
I looked death in the face last night
I saw him...
...and laid siege, if you will,
to the Hemery senior dance.
They had fangs. They were biting people.
They had this look in their eyes.
Totally cold. Animal.
I think they were Young Republicans.
It was like a nightmare in there.
Of course, I had to keep my head.
But I've been there, you know.
Yeah, I saw a lot of action in Nam.
Well, I saw Platoon.
I'm very happy to accept this honor,
and I will try very hard to fulfill my needs
as your next Miss America.
I do think the students learned a valuable lesson about safety.
Except the dead ones, I mean. Of course.
Well, they learned it. [Chuckles]
But they really...
They really didn't have time to implement it, you know, and...
I... Are we live?
I felt something was wrong,
so we really got out of there before...
I mean, I heard stuff. We were nearby when we heard...
[Sobbing] I can't believe I let you do that to me!
Details are still sketchy
as to exactly who is responsible,
gang members, cultists.
Everyone seemed to see something different.
This is Liz Smith in Los Angeles.
[Groaning, Moaning]
[Rock]
[Chorus] Yeah
[Woman] I admit you got the biggest brown eyes
And you know how to bite your lips to tantalize
Sure Yeah
You can get any girl you want goin' and you do it
And don't say you don't know, 'cause you do
Well, baby, I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
So quit it
I love you, I love you I do, boy
But you ain't gonna cheat on me
I need you, I need you I do, boy
Choose Is it her or me?
Yeah
Just 'cause I have a say input
You should be ashamed of what I've been seeing
Damn Yeah
You better watch your step or, boy, you're gonna lose
The best thing you ever had
Oh, oh
Now he ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
So quit it
Oh, whoa
I ain't gonna eat out my heart anymore
I ain't gonna eat out my heart
English - US - PSDH