Hell.
Okay!
Ja.
Ja, tommy, for you the war's over.
Well, thank god for that.
Are you brooks?
Well, what do you see through that little hole of yours?
Quite a bit.
On a clear day, you can see mussolini.
Let's see.
That's great.
That's great!
I've always had a flair for carpentry.
What's your game then?
We're getting out of here tonight.
All we have to do is get those two centerboards down.
All you have to do, brooks...
Not what I have to do. I'm not going to escape, are we, bernard?
Yeah. Now does sir know about this?
Certainly, seems perfectly feasible to me.
It's every man's duty to try and escape.
Right, spoken like an officer.
Now, when we stop, your job, brooksy, is watchman.
If packy rips that roof, you know what we'll end up with, don't you?
What?
A dirty great draft from here to the fatherland.
All clear, brooksy?
Well, that was all perfectly feasible.
That was good, brooksy, you really use it up here.
Yeah, well, I wish you would.
The trouble with packy, he's one of your natural leaders.
- Oh, thanks. - Oh, yeah.
Lead us all into shit.
- Good night, last night? - Too much champagne.
I had dinner in munich with this nymphomaniac countess.
What did you have to eat?
Well, I was going to tell you about this countess.
Up the countess, what did you have to eat?
- Steak and kidney pie. - Oh!
Anyway, the countess said to me...
What about the pudding?
Who told you?
Watch out, here comes the scout master.
Over.
Look at him.
Smarten up, lads.
Uh, not you, private, your soul's in the care of the pentagon.
Sure.
It appears that jerry needs volunteers
for outside working parties in munich.
Now, we don't want anyone volunteering for that sort of thing, do we?
I mean, if god had intended for them to win,
he wouldn't have put us in the british army,
would he?
Besides, you're still drawing army pay.
So let's all serve god, king and country by staying here.
Yes, sir.
The vicar was around this morning,
accusing us of being unpatriotic.
Well, let's face it, we could hardly be doing the german war mission any good,
us not working for it.
I mean, the allies didn't start winning the war until after we were captured.
Hey, brooksy, ask him, is he ever going to go with you?
Hey, corporal.
- Oh? - What did he say?
He said we're going to the tierpark.
Oh, that's nice.
What the hell is a tierpark?
It's a zoo!
A flipping zoo.
Zoo is not open to the public.
You will start with keepers and attendants who will show you how to do.
Language should make no difficulty.
If you're given a shovel and a heap of dirt,
and an empty wagon, words are unnecessary.
Only come to me if urgent trouble.
I am the director.
Oh, well, there is much to do. Thank you.
Come. We have a thing to do.
Must be some catch.
We'll be spending all our time shoveling animal clods.
Yeah, well, I hope I can get the budgies.
That's mine?
Ah! Herr kellerman.
Well, I've certainly got some shoveling to do here, haven't I?
Kellerman.
Oh, brooks.
Good.
Come.
I was prisoner in england, last war.
- Herefordshire. - Oh, yes, it's very pretty around there.
Come, elephant not hurtful.
Yeah, well, I'll take your word for it.
You see elephant before?
Yes, in the zoo.
But from out there, not from in here.
- Mmm-hmm. - Where's it from?
Ceylon. Here, lucy.
She likes apples very much.
Lucy, this is your new friend.
Brooks. He is here to help us.
Well, I'm... I'm sorry, I haven't got any apples.
I'll bring you some tomorrow.
Does she like corned beef?
This is just great. This is just bloody great!
Meat. Real meat.
Yeah, but you don't know what they are, do you?
Oh, I don't give a rat's.
It's the same as herr director's having over there.
Hello, squire.
Look at all this harmless grub.
What you on, brooksy?
I'm on the elephants.
- Good, you've got your work cut out. - No, it's good.
It's interesting.
You're lucky, I'm on alligators. Look!
Hey up. Over there.
I don't think much of yours.
It's all too much. Women and meat all in one day.
He's been here all morning, trying to chat her up.
Yeah, but even the other one wouldn't fancy kurt.
Hey, she's coming over. She's coming over.
Here's your chance, brooksy. Give her a chat.
Get a dazzling repartee.
Any chance of, um, of seconds?
Phew!
Hey, get off!
An apple!
Did you see that? She gave me an apple!
Now she trusts you. You are a fully qualified lucy keeper.
Well, the army always said it would teach me a trade.
Do you know that elephants get the same illnesses as humans?
You're getting rather keen on that job of yours.
He'll be putting in for overtime next.
So? Best four weeks I've had since I was called up.
How's your llama, brooks? Do give it my blessing, will you?
Oh, it's an elephant, sir.
It gets chicken pox and measles and things like that.
Why don't you keep it warm then?
Of course, you know what they say about him and the elephant.
Oh, we're just good friends.
Come on, lucy. Come on, girl.
When are you going to teach her to play cricket?
Oh, no.
You're not working here, are you?
Listen, you think I'd let the english monopolize the cushiest job in germany?
It cost me 50 smokes and a watch to get here.
Aren't you going to introduce me?
Oh, yes, of course, this is lucy. Lucy this is packy.
- Say how do you do. - Hi, lucy.
Brooks, you don't seem too pleased to see me.
No, not much.
You remind me of the war.
What is that?
Tapir. South american, female.
Well, if you don't let on to that tapir, there's no security in here.
Now, if you wished... I mean, if one wished,
one could just walk out of here, couldn"t we then? I mean, uh, couldn't one?
Oh, we're not on that again, is one?
Listen, it's a hundred miles to switzerland. It's all easy country.
What's that?
Oh, that's reserved for an american soldier,
male, who'll be caught in a bavarian barn
with frost bite and turnip poisoning.
What do you say to that, errol flynn?
I can escape. I'm going to hide inside a vaulting horse
and dig my way out while the others are exercising.
- Coming? - No.
Ah. It's hawk eyes today.
Who, will "?
Oh, he's a good lad, willi.
Treats us like the gentlemen we are. Morning, willi!
Good morning!
Where are the others?
Now I don't know, willi, we haven't had matchings yet.
Let's go.
Okay, fellows, now lift.
Come on, fellows, take care now.
- Morning, gentlemen. - Morning, sir.
This morning's text is taken from ezekiel.
The word of the lord came unto me saying,
the allied invasion of france has now been confirmed.
Two australians have escaped from the laundry working party.
Now, I'm giving odds of three to one,
that they'll be captured within the next 10 days.
We shall be having two more men in each bunk
as 100 indian prisoners arrive on tuesday.
And montecasino was captured on the 18th,
which means that you lot owe me 20 cigarettes,
four bars of chocolate and a tin of powdered milk.
May the lord be with you.
- Amen. - Amen.
Of course you know why he became a vicar, don't you?
- No, why? - He had a bet with his choir master.
They're early.
You go to the shelter.
No, I'll help you fasten lucy.
No, no, no, I do it.
You go now. Quick. Snap!
Must be your lot this time of day.
Yeah, well...
Right at lunch, of course. It was goulash.
Jeez! That was close!
What the hell are they bombing up here for?
Bloody hell!
Oh, blimey!
- That's your elephant house. - I'm going back.
Me too, you need my help.
Hey, this way leads right to the road.
- Come on. - Thanks for your help.
Hey, come on, man, we ain't going to get another chance like this again.
Listen, there's kellerman and lucy in there.
Elephant house!
Are you coming or are you going to make sure he gets a clean bandage, huh?
You better make sure they don't catch you, boy.
Lucy?
Kellerman!
Lucy!
It's all right now, baby. It's all over.
No more bombs, baby.
Oh, why?
Brooks! Lucy, she's all right?
She is now.
There was some glass in her side, but I got it out.
Terrible, terrible. We had to shoot many animals.
Yes, you have done well, but... where's kellerman?
He's there.
Herein.
It was our local military.
I fight with them all morning.
But I have won.
Lucy is to be evacuated to innsbruck.
There she will be safe. No bombs.
She leaves tomorrow, with you, brooks.
Does she? I mean, do we?
- How are we going to get there? - By train.
Oh... first class, I hope.
Come on, lucy, forward. Forward, lucy. Forward.
Come on, willi. Give it a push, will.
Tell him to shut up, will you?
Come on, lucy. Come on, lucy, come on.
Come on.
Heil hitler.
The colonel, ss.
What's the matter? What's he want?
Shh...
Tell him I'm the keeper.
Tell me yourself. I speak english.
Where's she from?
Oh, from ceylon.
It is surely where she belongs.
I suggest you get her pack there.
But she's got to be evacuated, in this truck.
No, not on this truck. I'm commandeering this truck.
But we've got papers, haven't we? Official ones.
Irrelevant!
If I wanted the whole train, I should commandeer it.
As you can see I have to move important military equipment.
Certainly more important than an elephant.
Even an elephant from ceylon.
Look, if you're going to take the train,
how are we going to get the elephant to innsbruck?
You could always walk. The exercise will do her good.
Yes!
Well, you look a bit overdressed, like...
Like something out of the lord mayor's show.
Lucy, auf. Auf, auf, lucy!
Auf, lucy!
Hello.
Uh...
Has she come to see us off?
She's coming with us.
- What? - Kurt has been to the director.
He persuades him, we need a cook for journey.
Ah, do not look pessimist.
All is possible. Route is worked out.
Each day 20 kilometers. You will take 10 days and one morning.
Good luck, brooks.
Look after my lucy.
I will do my best. There is much to do.
Cheers, brooksy.
I hope you'll both be very happy.
Lucy...
Come on, now. Come on.
Roll over. Come on.
I told you we needed a cook.
That was very good.
It was a poor attempt at a good polish dish.
Polish?
I didn't know you were polish. I thought you were russian.
Mind you, can't tell the difference, can you? I mean, we can't.
I knew some poles once.
Used to meet them in a... In a pub back in england
when I was stationed there.
They're a mad lot. Good lads though.
For foreigners.
All this was carved in the 18th century by austrian farmers.
And there's willi from austria,
and the elephant from ceylon.
Just like a boy scout jamboree.
We're here to forge new links of peace and understanding.
Ah! We forgot the master race.
There goes peace and understanding out the spout.
Where's he going to?
He has to report in to the director, every night.
Then he will get drunk.
A pig, and he drinks.
He'd rather be winning the iron cross,
wants his mother to be proud of him.
He should be glad she even loves him.
All right, campers, rise and shine.
Come on, willi, put on your socks.
Come on, my dear, get up.
I hope you slept well?
My home is there, high in the mountains.
Of course the mountains are very nice, but once you've seen one,
you've seen them all.
Ah, the prodigal pig returns.
Let's hope he stays out every night.
We were waiting for you, you drunken pig.
We better shelter. It might rain.
He will want to continue, to keep to the 20 kilometers.
What?
Oh, yes, she's never seen a pig before. Lucy, this is a pig.
- A pig. - A pig!
Hey, you can cut that out.
Cut it out!
Lucy. Lucy!
Lucy!
Lucy, stop!
Lucy!
Lucy, stop!
Lucy! Lucy, easy, it's all right.
Lucy, there's nobody else. No bombs.
Easy, lucy. Come on, girl.
Well, now you're here, you might as well eat, eh?
Come, lucy, come now.
Look, tell him to shut up.
He says he knows how to kill her.
What's he on about now?
He says he's been instructed how and when.
Danke!
You'd hardly think there was a war on.
This is austria, now. The war has hardly affected people here.
Well, the elephant certainly has.
I wish I was charging a shilling a time.
A shilling.
All right, you lucky people, one more for the elephant ride.
What's he saying?
He says we stay the night. There will be dancing.
I expect he wants to give the spot prize.
Oh, I wouldn't stand there if I were you.
Not after all the turnip she's had for dinner.
I shall stay, it is not fair.
No, you go and enjoy yourself.
I saw the way that barmaid was making eyes at you. You'll be all right there.
Kurt will not bother us tonight.
He will be very drunk but there are many girls in the village.
- Bye. - Ciao.
He likes you very much.
Well, I like him. He's a good lad, willi.
Do you want an apple? An apple.
You are strange about people. Never too impressed.
Aren't I?
No, I suppose not.
Except with the elephant.
Oh, she impresses me, all right.
If you're going to bother to preserve anything, what better than her, eh?
I want also to be preserved.
I'd like to think of you surviving.
I'm all right then, for a pole?
Yeah.
I broke my leg, brooksy.
I think I broke my leg, brooksy.
Oh, brooksy, my leg's broken. Ah!
Brooksy... brooksy, my leg... brooksy, don't do that, it's broken. Ah!
They don't make barn roofs like they used to, brooksy, for escaping prisoners.
Well
la terre est broken.
Who's he?
He's french.
He's my lookout.
What's he looking out for?
He was supposed to be looking out for holes in the roof.
Hey, 100k, brooks. We're starting, uh, a resistance. You know, partisans.
And we saw you, we saw the germans go.
And I said to myself, "brooks will want to get in on this."
"He's a soldier, really. He's going to see great opportunity.”
You don't have any food, do you?
No, I'm afraid not.
Look, don't you think you... you might... well, somebody might...
Hey...
Hey!
I, uh, think he's trying to say something.
I don't know why they don't teach american in these continental schools.
German soldier!
Well, brooks, I guess this is goodbye then, huh?
Yeah. I suppose it is.
Come on now, pull.
Quickly.
Brooks! Brooks!
What the hell do you want?
What is it?
Look, I've got some food for you.
Marvelous food.
Look, vronia. Eggs and some ham and butter.
Look, butter.
Uh... what's the matter?
Aren't you hungry?
Yeah.
Vronia! Vronia!
Look, I don't know what you're saying,
but if it's the ladder you want, it's up here. It's staying here.
- Stick it. - He will do something stupid.
- It's not worth it. - Yes, it is.
It is not!
Well, one thing you learn as a keeper,
never climb a ladder near an elephant,
especially when you're smashed.
Isn't that right?
We better give her a drink of water.
Wasser!
But she always has water when we come to it.
He says we have no time.
We must make for the bridge.
Lucy, stop.
Just keep still, girl. Still, still, still, still.
Oh, I'm afraid elephants can't move backwards.
I'm... I'm sorry.
But I've seen her do it.
No, willi, you must've been mistaken.
Hey!
Look, circus elephants can walk backwards, but not lucy.
Nor can she stand on one leg balancing a beach ball on her bottom.
So, you did walk.
Well, we had to, didn't we?
- Somebody took our train. - Yeah.
Well, you will get your bridge back
as soon as I have finished with it.
Get her off.
Oh, I'm afraid, that's impossible.
You see, we can't turn around here, sir. Sir.
But I have seen elephants walk backwards many times.
Specially trained, trick elephants.
It can't be done.
We have wasted enough time already.
What stalag are you from?
7a.
When you return, we must see about a transfer for you.
Yeah, well, if you'd let her have a drink,
we wouldn't have been on the bridge, would we?
Don't you dare walk backwards till we get to innsbruck, do you hear?
Don't you dare.
You know, it was just my stubbornness on that bridge today.
And you're the one that had to suffer. En?
No food and no water.
Does she forgive you?
You know what she says?
She says, "don't do it again.”
You know, kurt's been at her all day.
Tonight, he will take it out on me.
There are no village girls here.
He's back!
Having reported in like the good soldier he is.
Vronia!
And with a belly full of schnapps by the 100k of it.
Vronia!
- Vronia! - You cold?
Come on, lucy, let's get these logs moved near the fire.
Come on, my darling.
Come on, lucy. Forwards, here.
Get this log over here to the fire. Work for your living.
Come on, lucy, push. Come on, lucy, push!
Kurt! Watch out!
He says he has orders about killing the elephant.
Yeah, well, tell him, orders only count when he's sober.
Is he dead?
Yes. Very!
But what will they do with me?
They will court martial me.
They will shoot me! They will shoot all of us!
What will we do?
How far is switzerland?
In miles, about 60.
Well, then, we must cross the border, all of us, you too, willi.
But I can't go to switzerland.
Yes, you can.
Unless you want to pick up that gun and turn us all in.
It would mean your ss.
Right.
We must hide the body.
Willi, you and vronia go ahead.
I'll try and keep lucy out of sight.
I'll meet you later in your village.
- What do you mean? - We must stay together.
Yeah, well, there's not much point, is there?
I mean, if we're captured within a couple of hours,
which we will be if she's running around the country side.
She's not exactly inconspicuous, is she?
But why should people connect lucy with us?
They'll report her, won't they?
I mean, you don't see an elephant in your front garden
then suddenly put it out of your mind, do you?
Then tie her up somewhere.
Oh, um... No, no, I can't do that.
Not around here. You see, I got to get her right out of the way
before I leave her.
You don't intend to leave her, do you?
I know what you're thinking.
But it's a crazy gesture. You cannot risk yourself for this animal.
I have already, haven't I?
Today I killed my first german in the war.
What do you suppose that was in aid of? King and country?
This is the address of my village. We will be safe there.
If you come, I will try to get us across the border.
Yeah, well, give me two weeks.
I'll get there, I promise you.
Now, you two get out of here.
He's going to try and take that elephant all the way, you know, willi?
Even over the alps.
Why not?
Hannibal did it.
What's up with you, then, squire?
We won the war or something?
It's lucy, the elephant.
For two days they haven't reported.
Well, I wouldn't worry about it if I were you, chief.
Even brooksy couldn't lose an elephant.
Come on, you. There's a nature ramble on the way.
If we don't get out of here, they'll really have something to tell teacher about.
Come on, you big fat cow.
Vorwarts.
Lucy, vorwarts.
Steady, lucy.
Blanche, charles, an elephant!
An elephant?
He won't be going back to the stalag after all.
Right, this is far enough for one day.
I'm going back down to that village we passed just now.
I'll see you later.
Hey, if I'm not back by 6:00, phone the police!
Ciao!
No chimney smoke, no dogs.
I think we'll have a go at this one.
Anybody about?
Well, we didn't make a reservation.
But, I'm sure they can fit us in.
"Spiritus.”
Medicine.
Now here's luxury. An indoor shave,
followed by an indoor kip.
Not bad.
Room service, please.
Would you tell the countess I'm ready for her now, please.
Thank you.
The schnapps is here.
It's good, ja?
Yes.
The schnapps is good, ja?
Schnapps is good!
You okay?
I should have known it was you,
driving on the left-hand side of the road.
Yeah, well, I was trying to beat the rush hour.
Give the man a drink, josef.
Come on, get that truck down!
Don't you want it?
No.
I never got a license and, uh...
You know how touchy those german police are.
All right, come on up.
Okay, let's go.
I thought you'd be in minneapolis by now.
Staying with friends, eh?
Not friends.
Colleagues.
Deserters, prisoners...
It's kind of a foreign legion.
Yeah, and you're beau geste, en?
Ah, if that's french for gary cooper, that's right.
What do you need an army for here, eh?
I mean, this is cuckoo clock country, not the sands of iwo jima.
Listen.
Our guys are burning up italy, right?
Now, every spare german is going down there.
And they gotta go through the brenner pass, which is in austria, right?
Well, they come down back roads, in little convoys like this, right?
Yeah, well, I must have been a big disappointment to you.
No, brooksy, it's good to see you.
What you been doing with yourself, anyway?
Um...
You know that elephant I was in charge of?
Yeah?
Well, I brought her with me.
You see, we were on our way to innsbruck, officially.
I killed this guard so, um...
So now I am taking her to switzerland.
You know, brooksy, I know it's a dopey question to ask you,
but, uh, what are you taking the elephant to switzerland for?
Because she's never been there.
You don't have to escape, brooksy.
They repatriate people like you.
Just like a lot of kids playing toy soldiers.
"Hey, you're dead!”
"No, I'm not. You can't kill me 'cause I'm a tank.”
Lucy!
This is the big one.
This is the one we've been waiting for.
There's an elephant.
It's coming towards our charges.
They're charged by josef, they're self-detonating.
If she hits it, she'll blow the whole thing up.
Lucy!
Can you kill it?
I can stop it.
What a time to go big game hunting.
Lucy, here!
Oh, no.
Brooks.
Lucy, come here.
Come here, girl.
Damn elephant.
I think the convoy will reach it first.
I can't take that chance.
Whoa, lucy.
Easy, lucy.
And the next!
Go, lucy. Lucy, steady.
Let's go down and see.
See? Packy's army, 21st hit and run.
I feel privileged to have seen it.
Privileged to have seen such a contribution to the war effort.
Look, brooks, there's a war going on.
Now, to you it might be a make-believe war.
But it's happening, brooks,
even here.
All right, packy, I accept that.
But don't revel in it.
So you've got a dozen dead germans here.
Do you know what for?
Do you?
Bully beef!
Eight truckloads.
Of bully beef.
A german patrol!
Well, I guess then you'll be going your own way now, huh?
Yeah, I guess I will.
Good luck, both of you.
You know, from now on the going's gonna get a bit tougher.
And packy's little escapades aren't going to help either.
Hmm?
Hey, you!
What's the matter with you? You haven't said a thing all day.
You're not well, are you?
What's this there?
Oh, my god, that's all we need.
Where is the doctor, bitte?
Da.
Is herr doctor here?
Sprechen sie english?
- Do you speak english? - I speak english!
Good morning.
Can I help you?
Look, I'm... I'm a british prisoner of war.
Escaped.
I'm not going to harm you but I... I have a sick animal.
Where is the animal?
About a mile up the hill.
Look if you want to turn me in, then you must.
- I am come to 100k, yes? - Yes.
Elefant.
Bitte, what is elefant in english, please?
Elephant.
No, in english please.
We're here.
So, elefant in english is, "we're here".
Ah, danke, danke.
Here we are, lucy, I'm back!
Ah, "we're here” means elefant.
All right, my baby. I'm back.
Does she bite?
Open up. Open up.
You'll need a brighter torch.
I must listen to the pulse.
Can you tell what's wrong?
What do you think it is?
My friend, in my thoughts, "we're here"...
Ziegenpeter has.
Ziegenpeter?
Ziegen... moment. Ja, ziegenpeter.
Ja, the "we're here", mump has.
- Mumps? - Mumps, ja, it's all mumps.
I am quite sure. No safe.
Ja, please, give me medicine.
Usually when she is ill, we give her rum.
About a bottle.
That makes her feel better.
Yes, I know, it makes anybody feel better.
We must keep, "we're here", quiet, no cold, no more move.
And to eat only the soup.
No moving?
For how long?
Seven days, one week.
- A week! - It's all right, no one will find her.
Tell me, is, um...
How far is the village of lungern from here?
Only 10, 15 kilometers.
You'll go there?
Yes, I, uh...
Have to...
Have to meet somebody there.
There, go, go, we take care of "we're here."
When you come back, she better. No more mump.
Mumps.
You stupid girl.
I suppose you caught it from one of those children at the carnival.
Well, as long as you don't give it to me.
As long as the elephant doesn't give me mumps.
Look, if I'm not back here in one week,
then you must get in touch with munich zoo.
Ja, ja.
Thank you very much.
Both of you.
Much obliged, I'm sure. Much obliged, I'm sure.
Ah!
God save the queen!
The king.
- Brooks! - Yes, of course it's brooks!
Your supper tastes good.
- Oh, you don't mind if I... - No, no, of course, of course.
Where's vronia? Upstairs?
No.
Vronia...
She's in another house.
What about you, any trouble?
No, no. No trouble. Listen, you must not stay.
There's my mother and my sister in this house.
Behind the house is a field. Sleep in one of the barns.
I shall bring you food in the morning.
Yes, all right, if that's what you want.
The border's not far from here, is it?
No.
We talk tomorrow.
Where's your pet?
Lucy.
I'm afraid she's ill. I had to leave her.
I cannot understand why you stayed with her at all.
Oh, you know the english, we love animals.
Our dog didn't think so.
It was a german dog.
Stern rings constantly about his damn elephant.
He will be greatly upset
that you have mislaid her.
I don't see what you lot are so interested in us for.
I thought the ss had different functions.
Don't underestimate yourself.
You killed a german soldier.
That's a fairly reliable way of attracting my attention.
When, three days ago,
a convoy was destroyed, there was one of ours there.
He claimed to have seen an elephant. Did he, brooks?
What color?
That man is one of the raiders.
I'm sure you have never seen each other before.
Perhaps the two of you will think over what you are going to tell me.
We do have other functions.
Bear them in mind.
I'm sorry, brooks.
That's all right, willi.
That's all right.
They got us two days after we reached the village.
They threatened not me,
my family.
Yes, I can imagine.
That man turns you in
and you tell him it's okay.
What do you want me to do, kill him?
Do you suppose that will put all this right?
Ah!
Step down!
Ah...
Do not concern yourself with what might be going on with your friends downstairs.
It is of no importance.
The war, for you,
is nearly over.
I'm going to look damn silly
if there's nobody here.
Okay, let's go.
Coming with us this time?
I never thought I'd say this, packy, but I'm glad to see you.
- Where are you taking us? - To my little gray home in the west.
Come on.
We're heading for the border. Get your climbing boots on.
I'll follow.
With the circus.
Well, we got this far.
Look, brooksy, we got minutes. You know, minutes!
Minutes to get out of here.
Notify stern if you like.
Tell the zoo where she is.
But leave her.
You're gonna have to leave her anyway, brooksy, some time.
How do you see yourself after the war?
Living in some english suburb,
with the world's largest kennel at the foot of your garden?
Switzerland, packy!
That's where I'll leave her.
All right, joan of arc.
But if you do go it alone, you'll never make it without a guide.
He's got a guide.
I will go with you, brooks.
Which way are you going?
Over at st. Anthony.
No, no, no, no, no.
It will be too well-patrolled.
Make for the pass.
It is harder going, but much safer.
If it's going to be that rough,
how the hell do you think you can get that damn elephant over the alps?
No, don't tell me.
Hannibal did it.
She is... has... was much sadness because you was not here.
But she is much better now. Complete.
But nobody knows about her?
No persons!
If I am telling, I am mending sick, "we're here”,
who is to believe me?
Lucy.
Lucy, you better now?
Oh, yes, you're not going to mess me around with your ziegenpeter. Hmm?
I suppose you had a nice rest while we've been up to here in it.
I...
I have a present for goodbye.
Rum!
Thank you, doctor. We can do with a little of this in the mountains.
No, it's not for you. It's for "we're here!”
Oh, well, I dare say she'll let us have a little nip.
And we'll drink to your health.
In switzerland. Hmm?
Switzerland is this way.
You better go ahead and see if the lane is clear before I bring lucy.
Okay.
There are six soldiers. They are coming this way.
Can we cross the river?
But it's too fast!
We'll have to try anyway.
They can't see us!
We've done it!
Whoo!
Shh!
Elefant!
Get the gun!
Hmm?
The gun.
They are firing back.
Oh... what is it?
Hmm?
Observe.
Maybe half a mile away.
Nothing to do with us.
Trouble...
And it's got nothing to do with us?
Well, don't ask for trouble.
Forget the charges.
Josef...
We've been through this before.
Now listen,
we have extra charges, right?
Right?
A supply train comes through here daily, right?
Huh, right?
Now...
If we put the two together,
we'll exit from here with a bang. Huh. Good.
You're mad!
Impetuous.
Irrational.
Even lovable.
But not mad.
Not mad.
Keep blasting away. Change the clip.
- But I can't. - Yes, of course you can.
Keep them pinned down, don't let them spread out.
- What are you doing? - I told you to keep firing, didn't I?
Please!
There are four kurts down there now this time, lucy.
Now push!
Lucy, push! Push, lucy! Push!
Push, lucy.
Push!
Make it quick.
Okay. Oh.
Oh.
I know, josef, I'm a madman. I know that.
I'm also a mechanical genius.
Sami, all right!
Okay, josef, watch this.
It's coming.
Should be on the newsreels back home.
"Escaped american war hero brings.”
"German war machine to a halt.”
A train coming.
It'll hit those logs.
Oh, no, no, no, no. That was terrible.
The men in the train.
We've killed them.
Look, willi, I'm sorry, but some of those...
Some of those things that packy says make sense.
Look, I didn't do all this just to start a war.
But now I'm this close,
I'm not going to lose.
Well, you see this is...
It's a new kind of charge.
Doesn't exactly blow the train up.
Kind of...
Trips it up. Trips it up.
It's brooks!
He got the train!
Well, we didn't have the cavalry support he's got.
Should we wait for them?
By the time we reach the border,
he'll have already won the war.
Come on.
If we get to the top of that, we are near the border.
There is a path. It is difficult, but there is a path.
Well, it's some climb.
What are the chances of getting lucy there?
Almost none, but that's never stopped you before.
What's the matter?
A german patrol is driving up.
Well, they'll move a hell of a sight quicker than we will.
Not if I stop them.
Look, there is only this path.
If I keep well-covered, I can hold them off indefinitely.
- Give me the gun. - Don't be silly.
You know what you're like with a gun. You can hardly see 10 yards ahead of you.
Oh, I'm not that bad. Please.
Lucy, forwards here. Lucy, forward!
He's done it!
Willi!
Brooks!
Brooks, 100k, I've done it!
Look, brooks, I've done it!
Packy!
Well, it's you and I now, lucy.
Let's head for the sun.
Lucy, here.
Stop! Lucy, stop.
Packy?
Good morning, brooks.
You have a remarkable animal.
It can't walk backwards,
but it can climb mountains.
There aren't many colonels that climb mountains either.
I'm a remarkable colonel.
Yes, you are.
If you started this cable car, your own sergeant took the tumble.
What's the matter?
Do you want all the glory?
Do you know geneva, brooks?
No, I don't suppose you do.
It is very beautiful.
The palace hotel is one of the finest in europe.
I shall take one of the suites there, overlooking the lake.
The wild duck and cherries are still excellent, they tell me.
Got a 48-hour pass, have you?
The allies have passed paris.
And lance corporal brooks has passed the tree line.
So what?
Germany will not be a good place for remarkable ss colonels
when the war is over.
Will switzerland be better?
Hmm, switzerland, corporal brooks, is simply en route.
And now you have come this far,
I suggest we go the rest of the way there together.
But there's still a man in the car.
I put the cable car out of action.
There will be other patrols.
Well, let's hope he's wrapped up warm. Hmm?
I can't believe that you got this far.
Well, we took a shortcut.
Much as you did.
The choice was yours.
The choice was easy.
It was either him willingly or the rest of them.
It was quite clear-cut and easy to make.
Well, we've all precepted ourselves, haven't we?
Hmm?
One way or another.
We are very near the frontier.
Look!
What is it?
It's a man with an elephant.
He's got von haller and a girl with him too.
Hold it, brooks.
Stay right where you are.
I would like to take my time over killing him.
He's on the same game as us.
Trying to get to the border.
Sudden attack of neutrality, von haller?
If I can get you across,
why should it worry you?
Getting through this pass requires subtlety.
I'm very subtle.
Yeah, well, you stay here.
Brooksy, come on. I want to talk to you.
Hey, hey!
What's the english point of view?
A man who wrecks trains, this should be a snap.
How many men?
Four. It's all I need with a setup like that.
Couldn't you go along the side,
under the hut, at night?
Well, there's two men doing that.
How about over the top?
There's two men doing that.
You trust von haller?
No.
We've got no choice, have we?
We can go back and try to climb the rock face.
But kill him first!
Gentlemen, I suggest you reach your decision quickly.
What is it, colonel?
What does the military mind find so interesting down there?
There's a german patrol.
About 10 or more.
He must have radioed ahead to have them come out and get us.
Which would be in about an hour.
- Unless... - Yeah.
Him?
Him, what could he do?
He's not even in uniform.
I mean, look at him. He looks all sort of, you know...
No.
But I still have this.
My pass.
That's really good, you know?
Oh!
This, they will obey without question.
It's good.
But I will need a gun.
No gun.
Give him the gun.
Go on.
And we'll keep the girl.
Just to make sure you do things properly.
I give you my word,
as a deserting german officer.
A man like that will not worry about her,
whether she's with him or not.
He will be making a trap.
He's right. You cannot trust him.
They're coming down to the bottom hut.
Welcome to switzerland!
Let me go first. I see.
Where are the others?
They are following.
When the shooting starts, we shall slip through to safety.
Don't be concerned about the others.
It's a trap! It's a trap!
Go back!
It's a trap, go back!
It's a trap!
Let's get out of here.
Brooks! Brooks!
I'm okay!
Hang on. I'll get you a rope.
A german patrol will be here in a minute.
Hey, wait a minute.
I got to take this rope to brooks, huh?
Give me enough rope to reach the frontier post.
Coming down!
Hurry up, brooks, they're coming up behind us.
I gotta cover us.
Just keep firing!
I've got an idea!
That's not funny, brooks. Come on up.
Whoa, john, come on.
If these charges don't work...
Packy's and the austrian...
I've been hit.
Hmm. It's only a scratch.
Scratch?
Hey, brooksy, I've been hit.
I've been hit.
In my leg!
You'll survive.
Your sort always do.
Come on, lucy, my love!
It's up to you now, baby.
Poor brooks!
He would have never been allowed in the palace hotel
without a tie.
It is not in the least dangerous where I'm going, corporal.
- Lucy, forwards! - Come on, lucy.
Come on, lucy.
Pull, lucy!
Lucy, pull.
Here, here, come on. Pull!
Forward, lucy. Come on.
Pull it, you nit!
What are you doing?
It's going.
- Come on, lucy. - Good girl. Push.
Great idea, brooks.
Forwards.
Forwards, here. Forwards.
Come on, forward, pull, fast!
Oh!
Switzerland.
You ever been to geneva, packy?
No.
No, I don't suppose you have.
The palace hotel, one of the best in europe.
I think I'll recoup there for a couple of days.
You think they'll allow elephants in there, brooksy?
Yeah, if you have a lead on them.
They look surprised to see us, brooksy.
Well, they'll be even more surprised when I unzip lucy
and 15 other prisoners fall out. Zip!
Well, looks as if we've made it.
The thing that disturbs me, brooksy, is we owe it all to this elephant.
Of course!
Why do you think I brought her?