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Well, let's see... this way? No, no...
This way. Yes, that that'll do. Okay.
Oh, dear.
Oh, all right. Let's see, uh...
[clears throat]
Uh...
[bumps microphone]
[sighs]
[coughs]
Uh...
Hello, everybody.
The filmmakers have asked if I would, uh, come out and uh
[clears throat]
warm up the crowd. I-I must confess, I don't know why they
chose me, for I am a humble town clerk.
So I hope all your tickets are in order.
Eh?
Er, but I did repurpose some spare index cards I had lying around
the office and I asked Susie to write some, I guess you would call them
jokes on here for you. Let me just, uh, get out my glasses and if
I could just find them...
Oh! Uh...
Oh! Right here on my nose!
Weren't they? [laughs]
I’d got my dollars worth if they’d been
a west end girl and as my Pappy used to say.
Uh...
Now then, uh...
Why was the secretary in the cake...
to bust her husband out of jail?
Uh, then in parentheses, on the card here it-it...
it says “filing.”
[silence]
Well, that wasn't a very funny joke at all.
[screams]
Ha-ha!
[applause] Yes. Hello.
[applause, triumphant music]
Uh, yeah, get-get him out of here.
Go.
[laughter]
Ladies and gentlemen, you are not suckers. You didn't come
here to listen to an old man rattle off nonsense from index cards.
Here at Besto Money, Cash Theater, we know what you want
because we want what you want, and we are gonna get it!
Romance, intrigue.
The mysteries of Mind, space and time.
Tonight, we have a truly spectacular entertainment.
See the strongman perform feats of staggering incompetence!
[groans]
See the island’s native beauty walk perilously along a tightrope!
AUDIENCE: Wow!
I tell you the view ain't bad from where I'm standing.
Hear the world's oldest woman give unrequested relationship advice!
If you want it, you can get it, but you're gonna have to pay.
[children laughing]
Charming.
Audience, come here.
A little closer.
That's nice. You're a good-looking crowd.
I know that you don't go in for all that smoke and mirrors nonsense.
You want your thrills, but you want them with heart.
And that is just what we're going to give you
The heart, the spleen and what’s left of the liver!
So, without further ado,
Would you please wheel out the sick little boy?
[grunting]
Ow...
[groaning] Ow...
Incipit Gutboy’s Bad Time Story.
[music]
I love to sit and fish while I am in the nude.
You may call me unmannered rustic, simple dumb or rude.
Curse me all you like, I will not start a feud.
Hmm.
I'm such a happy fisherman
fishing in the nude.
Well, hello stranger.
Nice fishing rod you've got there.
Oh, it's nothing special, just how I earn my keep.
Nonsense!
Why, I bet that thing’s got a thousand fish in its day.
Maybe so.
Never had any other rod.
You craft that yourself?
Not me, but my pappy did.
Yes, sir, a genuine native fishing pole.
Tell you what, I don't normally do this, but I'll trade you
six dollars for it.
What?
No, you can't have my fishing pole.
$10.
I need it!
How about if I give you an exclusive deal to
rent the pull back on a month-by-month no commitment contract?
No!
Now scat you lousy businessman!
I’m trying to enjoy myself.
Come on
I'm not stopping you from doing your job.
This is my job.
I need to buy something or this whole expedition becomes a waste.
I don't have anything but this pole
and I'm not selling it.
What about your skin?
I used to be a tanner
- and uh... - My skin?
- Are you out of your mind? - I tell you I won’t go home empty handed
Then wait here a bit and I’ll catch a fish to sell you.
Well...
All right.
[singing] I'm like a raindrop in a cloud.
I'm a lonesome little raindrop
[whistles]
helicopters of Ding Dong.
I'm a lonesome little raindrop
[whistles]
I’s up’n in the sky
Okay, okay!
Take my skin, just please stop singing!
Finally!
[laughs]
[music]
[singing] Now, when you’re...
cutting off a person’s skin,
You want to make sure your knives are sharp.
‘Cause nothing's worse than a screaming man.
Especially when your knives aren’t sharp
They thrash about and ruin the skin.
That's poorly cut, ‘cause your knives aren’t sharp.
So save yourself those awful sounds by making sure your knives...
are sharp.
Thank you for the skin.
Here is your $3.
What?
You said 10!
Ah, there was a seven dollar fee to remove it.
Did I not mention that?
That's outrageous.
Love to discuss the particulars, but I really must be off.
Business, you know. I'll have a receipt sent your way.
Ta-ta!
Well, how do you like that?
At least I still have my fishing pole.
Whoa, Nelly!
[grunts]
This is a big one.
Congratulations, Gutboy.
While you were hunting in the brine, hoping for a fish
You caught yourself a gorgeous bride
who will make a much tastier dish.
Oh, no, no, no, no way.
I don’t need this trouble. Back in you go.
[grunts] - Why are you trying to throw me away, Gutboy?
Don't you find me beautiful?
Why...
won’t...
you...
go...
back in?
I find you beautiful, Gutboy.
What are you, a witch?
How are you so rock-solid in the air?
You learn a lot of things on the ocean floor.
Like how to please a man.
[nervous laughter]
Be that as it may
I think it’d be best if you went back in the water
or maybe went
and checked into the hotel in town
or something.
Give me a kiss!
I won't!
I’d sooner kiss a hagfish!
Give me a kiss and I'll...
grant you a wish.
What?
You didn’t tell me you could grant wishes.
[lips smacking]
[dramatic romantic music] [wet kissing sounds]
Now...
What is your fondest wish?
I want to marry beautiful Sophia
the policeman's daughter.
I see.
Consider it done.
Really?
I could kiss you again!
[romantic music] [slurping, wet noises]
GUTBOY: Ah, ah, ah, ah!
Better be careful!
Don’t let me wife catch you doing that!
You’re... married already?
What?
No, I mean, the new wife you just got me, Sophia.
You're married to Sophia already.
No! Wait, did you grant my wish or not?
Of course not!
Not yet!
This is gonna take a lot of hard work.
Ugh! You said it was granted!
Gutboy, your shape is pleasing to a mermaid
but policeman’s daughters have extremely narrow senses of beauty.
Get out of here!
I don't talk to deceitful mystical creatures!
It’s something of a policy of mine.
Kiss me once more for good luck.
[frantic music]
[smooching]
Farewell, my love.
I'm off to fetch your bride!
Lousy mermaids, getting my hopes up for some feelings.
It’s so dumb
It’s not gonna work.
And I tried a lot of different ideas
and none of them seem to pan out.
[dramatic orchestral music]
That's the way that
That, uh...
ah, my feet!
I can't...
I can't move as quickly as-
That’s the pole
there, next to that bizarre monster!
Lousy pole thief, thinking he can go around stealing poles.
Hey, wait a minute. What are you doing?
Hey, give me that back!
This is my pole, I refuse to sell it to you!
The monster says it's his pole.
My name’s written on it.
What’s the name on it?
“Goot the fisherman”
- That’s my name! - That’s my name!
And I’ve been calling you “Besto” all these years.
Don’t worry about it, Kug.
It's clearly me!
- I’m a fisherman! - Stop obsctructing!
Do either of our Goots have
proof of identification?
Of course!
My fingerprints should match the records.
It’s clearly fish, I am mirror man!
Ow!
I'll just go over there to the...
to the cabinet.
Here we are, yes, all right.
Er, Gunther, Gunter, Galloway, Gingsburg, Goat!
Ah!
Oh.
Woah!
Yes!
[gasps]
It's a perfect match!
Here you go, Goot.
Hahaha!
But is Fishman clearly me
or [inaudible]
Ow!
Hey!
Watch it Goot!
You're not above the law!
[laughs]
Let me buy you a drink, boy.
Okay, sure.
You know in Mexico, they don't let you buy
drinks if you’re wearing a skin.
Of course, drinks there only cost a quarter.
Ow...
Merma-
Mermaid, come back.
I want to change my wish!
I want...
Revenge!
[mellow music]
TOWN CLERK: Yeah, I am not nearly paid enough
for all of this walking around.
Oh, my feet...
Oh these early mornings are getting to me, Susie.
I just...
I can't do it anymore. It's just too much.
I haven’t been out that early since I had to...
plow the fields and plant the corn
but that's-that was all behind me.
A couple more things and then it’s off to bed
for old Plop.
[laughs] That’s right, let’s see...
[sighs]
Hello, Plop!
Excuse my discomposure.
Uh, you startled me!
Who is that?
I need a marriage license.
Well, that's splendid.
Why don't you come out of the shadows
so I can see the happy bride?
No!
Oh!
Well, uh...
Uh...
Eloping!
Uh, well that’s alright, uh...
You can’t stop love, I say.
I won’t tell your pappy.
[laughs]
Now, I need to know...
who you are so I can
fill out the forms.
The marrying parties are beautiful Sophia,
and Gutboy
Now, I-I don’t think...
Kug the policeman would like that
very much.
Do you?
Just do it!
Now, Sophia!
Come here. Let's talk about this.
I never said...
I was Sophia
Oh my God! It’s...
[screams]
[grunts]
PLOP: How-how do I get out of here?
Er, window!
[grunting]
[Plop screaming]
You’ll write this marriage certificate
Or I’ll drench your whole office in blood!
I can’t!
It’s no good without the bride’s thumbprint!
Leave that to me, old man.
Just fill in the rest and notorize it!
Okay!
Okay, here!
Fill in the rest, but I-
I can’t
in good conscience...
notarize the form!
[indiscernible dialogue] [screaming]
[laughing] [Plop screaming]
How is your day today, Besto?
Long.
Right.
I guess I'll just fold
- this up. - Be careful with that.
That’s real peasant skin.
Of course...
[clears throat]
Sir.
[drums] [dramatic music]
Release the Giants.
Release the Giants!
Very good.
My golden giants.
How was the mining today?
Good, Master.
What was the turnout?
17 pounds of iron,
3 of silver
and two pure nuggets of gold
Splendid, splendid.
Uh,
Any accidents?
Two humans and a Great Dane
died in a mine collapse-
What?
- Oh boy. - If you lose one more dog,
I will melt you down
and sell your bones
Enough!
Report over.
You may rise.
Now.
Wrestle.
[intense drum beat]
[screaming]
[woman screaming]
[screaming]
[sighs]
Oh Sophia, it's been such a very, very long day of
upholding the law.
You work so hard, Papa.
Let me rub your shoulders.
Ah...
That’s nice.
Sophia,
Will you sing me one of your delicate little songs?
They put me into such a trance.
[whimsical music]
Wait, how did that gun-wielding, muscle-clad, pig-eyed
broken-nose of a policeman sire such a...
gorgeous daughter?
Well, that’s what he asked himself
15 years before.
I’m going to whip this island into shape!
Everywhere I look!
Thief!
Ow!
Oh!
Murderers!
[crying] No!
Ow!
Oh, what am I going to get at the market today?
- Jaywalker! - [screams]
WOMAN: [indiscernible dialogue]
Oh!
Well, it's not my first job
and it won't be my last.
Light on...
Yep, okay...
Unlicensed boat salesman!
Woah!
I’m so scared...
This is scary, I...
[screaming in pain]
Well, at least you waited until he signed the contract.
This scumbag has been trying to sell boats for 15 years.
Indeed.
And why’s he remained unlicensed this whole time?
Are you dumb or something?
The last town clerk died two decades ago.
Who's gonna give out the licenses?
Oh, I’m no dummy
But I’ve just arrived in town
My name is Besto, and I’m a...
Fur Trader.
Oh, pleased to meet you.
What brings you to our island?
Ah, professional squabbles.
I was deposited here by some colleagues
who were uninterested in a certain...
proposition of mine.
Nothing illegal, I assure you.
Hey!
On this island, I'm the boss, yeah?
I'm the line you better not cross.
But when you’re on the lawless sea, man
what you do doesn't matter to me!
Oh!
Oh...
Well...
Aren’t you a vision?
Well, you've found my little girl!
Thank you so much, Kug.
All in a day's work sir, and...
Miss.
Oh, Annabelle, you don’t have to be scared.
Thank the policeman for saving you, dear.
Oh, okay...
She’s shy
but thank you!
Such a beauty!
It’s a shame she's already married.
Married?
She’s the farmer’s girl.
I think that would make her his daughter.
Daughter?
Or else you have very liberal laws on this island.
No, we don’t have that!
I suppose it was his...
- Daughter. - Daughter.
What's a daughter?
[bright, upbeat music]
And then a baby crawls out from between the woman's legs.
Wait...
[bright, upbeat music]
I still don't grasp what-
You do it to me, then!
It won’t work either way.
You just don’t want me to have a daughter!
Preposterous.
Good day to you, sir.
Don’t walk away from this, Besto
Don’t walk away!
[dramatic music]
[steam whistling]
My dear woman,
is it permissible that I
propagate a child into you?
Get lost!
Sweet lady,
might I impose on you to allow a brief
impregnation?
You’re disgusting!
[sighs]
WOMAN: Ugh!
Charming Miss,
- Could I require- - Why, Kug.
- What? - How nice to see you again.
Hardly.
Have you been propositioning all the women at this Cafe?
If you must call it that,
Yes.
I read about it in a book.
It’s very proper.
Why, that's no way to find a mate.
Well, you’ve certainly been little help.
Now watch this.
Hmm...
Oh, miss.
Thank you, Miss.
Say...
You’re new here, aren't you?
I thought I was getting off at Waikiki, now I’m stuck.
Oh, well that's amazing.
Why?
The exact same thing happened to me.
You don’t say?
Now, don't think me too forward, but I was thinking
of attending the market Master’s ball.
And I was wondering-
Get to the point!
What’s this got to do with making daughters?
Ah!
Teach your friend some manners why don’tcha?
Maybe I should.
But then...
Maybe...
I shouldn’t...
Kug,
I have a plan.
WHAT?
Come on, ladies
you know the law.
Kug, you ugly old mango
What are you enforcing that old poop for all of a sudden?
[Kug growls]
Yes. Yes. Yes. That appears to be all of them.
[clears throat]
Very good, Kug.
Now, come back at sunset in your best clothes.
Ladies, ladies. I'm so sorry
Kug treated you so rudely
[singing] But there's one small favor I want to ask of you.
I promise compensation
riches, power too!
It’s not too tough if you ask my view
but once the party starts tonight,
ust cling to Kug
and hold him tight.
I promise you he will not fight.
He wants a kid. He needs a kid.
[laughing rythmically]
No, no, no, no
love for a cop
who would lock us away
and chain us up!
Especially with such an ugly
crop of hair.
And no hygiene to speak of.
Ladies, wait!
You don’t understand.
Kug is really
a powerful, man.
is really a powerful, man. He could put you in positions
of authority.
Or at least when you're working, he could
leave you be.
It’s out of the question.
No way, man!
Not for money, power, jewels
a shop, or even land!
Why, I never met such
an obstinate group of violators of city ordinance
Isn’t there even one of you
who’s out just to make a buck or two?
I'll do it.
Porking me ain't easy
and diddling me ain’t fine.
But if he aims it right,
and shoots his coppers good,
I’ll squeeze him out a kid or two
that will look just like him.
But I want lots of money
And I ain’t fake no
prim.
[chuckles]
No, no, you certainly won't fake any Prim.
[chuckles]
[evil laugh]
[thunderclap]
Sorry, man
but if you don't meet the dress code,
I can’t let you onto the boat
No, no, no what are you doing?
Kug is our guest of honor.
Come on up, I love your hat!
Tre dashing!
Pig-licking dandy.
BESTO: You ever been on a yacht before, Kug?
No.
Oh, it is absolutely the best.
Drink up.
Oh, no.
It's against the law to drink while I’m on duty.
And I'm always on duty.
Did you forget?
You’re on the sea now.
No laws out here.
There's...
no...
lawless sea!
My God!
Hiyaa!
I'm gonna be mayor!
Woah!
- Gimme, gimme that sash! - Mr. Mayor
I am so sorry!
Kug, get off!
What were you thinking?
Oh, quite all right, Besto.
I'm still young and popping!
I can stand a tackling every now and then!
Hope to administer a couple of tackles tonight myself
If you catch my drift
[laughs]
Say, uh, when-when were you planning on leasing the, uh...
[laughs]
You know...
Yes, yes, Kug and I were just on our way to
do that.
Huh?
Your daughter lies this way,
old friend.
Ladies, I am pleased to announce that you are free
[women chatting]
Please enjoy the party upstairs.
I think I’d have more in jail.
You're free to stay and watch.
All right, all right!
I’m moving on!
Good luck, Kug.
[laughs]
You heard the man.
Go enjoy the party!
A whole party?
I ain’t enjoying no such thing.
Why you...
Kug it's okay!
She’s here to help you
with your situation.
Your daughter...
Uh, situation.
Don’t worry
You'll figure it out, she's quite accomplished.
Okay, bye now!
So, you're...
Here we go!
[Kug screams]
[Kubble groaning]
[coughs]
Is it a girl?
No...
It’s a ...
Besto!
It's a frog thing!
Of course it's a frog thing.
This was your first try.
You can’t expect to get it right immediatley.
Do it again.
KUBBLE: Come here you nasty old buffalo.
[Kubble muttering]
Besto!
No, no, no. Do it again.
- KUBBLE: Oh, oh oh. - BESTO: I’ll just put this over here.
Can anyone else do anything right?
[Kubble groaning]
KUBBLE: How many more?
BESTO: Frog thing
again.
Oh...
KUBBLE: Oi, oi, oi, oi.
BESTO: No.
KUBBLE: Get out of there!
BESTO: Wrong!
Is it a girl yet?
BESTO: Frog thing!
[Kubble muttering]
Oh!
[Kubble shuddering in pain]
BESTO: Incorrect.
[Kubble groans]
Besto!
Another frog thing.
KUBBLE: Oh no...
Kubble’s just about kaput.
It's too much.
You gotta pay me more for this, this is...
hurting me long-term.
You promised me a daughter!
All right
listen, you two...
just keep at it.
I’ve got a plan.
[sweeping orchestral music]
[Besto whistling]
Yes, crops are bad this year
And you with that extra mouth to feed.
Oh, things aren't looking good for old Plop.
No. No, they aren't.
If only you had a job that didn't depend on the weather.
Say...
I'm a good friend of the mayor.
How would you like to be the new town clerk?
What? Me?
But I can hardly read!
It's no matter.
I just need one little thing.
and I promise I could do this operation
with a minimum of pain
I’ve had the notion for quite some time.
[upbeat sweeping music]
[Besto whistling]
I've got it!
Ah.
[snoring]
BESTO: Haha.
Oh...
[laughs]
Ah...
Hmmm...
Hmmm?
Maybe I can just put the...
Well!
Maybe she'll grow into it.
Wake up you happy pappy!
Huh?
May I present...
your daughter.
Kubble!
Kubble, wake up!
It's a miracle!
[Kug gleefully laughing]
Now I have a daughter of my own!
Oh, Besto, you’re the bestfriend
I could have ever hoped for!
Oh...
She found her own way out, did she?
Well I still want my money,
Besto.
Of course, dear Kubble.
I happen to know of a rather large farm
that I believe the town records will indicate is in your name.
Pays me in dirt?
Ugh...
How do you like that?
Now everything will be good forever!
I will call you...
Sophia.
GUTGIRL: But all was not good forever...
for after 15 years festering
on the ocean floor...
Plop’s daughter has risen as...
Gutgirl!
And is now trudging towards Sophia
to force her into permanent matrimony
with her love...
the bizarre monster...
Gutboy!
[thud]
[heavy slam] - [screams]
[intense music]
Beautiful Sophia,
15 years ago,
you stole my skin
Now my one true love has fallen in love with it
and I need it back!
I don’t know what you're talking about, you crazy monster!
Quiet!
If you don’t give me my skin back,
I’ll drown us all in blood!
so help me I will,
I know how to breathe underwater!
SOPHIA: Okay, wait!
Give me a chance, at least
I-I don't think I ever stole your skin
but if I did, I certainly didn't mean to
Be fair.
I will trade you my skin
for the answer to a riddle.
[dramatic piano music]
Very well.
Okay.
Um...
Okay. Hold on, okay.
I've just begun trying to utter my name
and if I cannot then it’s you that’s to blame.
submerged in dark waters, I see, hear and smell.
allowing abstraction in you do I dwell.
What am I?
[intense music]
[intense drum beat]
My brain,
yes,
very well.
[Gutgirl laughing maniacally]
[Sophia crying]
Now, to sign the marriage contract.
So long, beautiful Sophia.
I'm off to claim my groom.
Wait!
What?
I said I’d trade you my skin
for the answer to my riddle.
The answer to my riddle was your brain!
Give me your brain!
[grunts]
[screaming, grunting]
[Gutgirl groans]
[grunts]
[Sophia wailing]
[upbeat techno music]
Well, that worked out better than I could have hoped.
NO!!
[screaming]
[Screaming]
[retches]
Whoa...
What am I now?I
Such a mix of memories and powers
but I feel completely new and...
so refreshed!
[retching]
[retches]
Hmmm...
Well, they are married now I suppose.
I had better go warn Gutboy.
Gutboy
Get up! You're in a pickle!
[Gutboy groans]
My head hurts.
Yeah, it's bleeding.
What?
Oh, right.
So,
the good news is, you're married to Sophia!
Really? That’s wonderful
Really?
Well sorta.
It's more accurate to say that a chimera of Gutgirl and Sophia
with the skin Sophia had been wearing for so long
has and may enforce a license of marriage.
Okay.
Wait, aren’t you Gutgirl?
I was.
I was Gutgirl and I was Sophia
We kind of got mixed up. There was a brain swap.
You can call me...
Sophieguts Prettybutts.
I think it’s accurate enough, don’t you?
Anyway,
she's the one with the thumb prints.
Oh.
I don’t think it’s quite fair to call her Sophia, though.
So I’ll call her Skingirl!
I say she'll enforce the contract because
All of my old obsession with you is gone.
So it must have ended up in her.
along with my anger, evil daddy issues,
And overwhelming sexual mania.
Oh...
Yeah,
I can still play piano, though
which is pretty cool
Neat!
I would apologize, but most of the guilty parts ended up in her
but the more evil she is,
the more I pity you,
even if I'm not guilty.
So.
I thought...
I could offer you another wish to make up for it.
Really?
I could...
nullify the marriage contract.
Or...
whisk you away to France!
- Or... - No!
Nuts to love!
You missed it, but these guys all came and stole my fishing pole!
I want revenge!
Perfect!
Who are the fiends?
Plop the clerk,
Kug the policeman,
and most of all,
Besto the capitalist.
Consider it done.
Hold on there!
I don't want you...
draining spleens or whatever your
weirdo idea of revenege is.
Fair enough.
What do you propose?
I'm coming with you.
First, we’re going to Plop’s house.
He should be having this midnight tea now.
And I want to fish it.
What?
Put a fish...
in his teapot.
But...
Hold on.
Where can we get a fish at this hour?
You forgot.
I used to be a fisherman.
[laughs]
Woah!
You two? The new servants?
The host is getting stranger and stranger taste these days.
Indeed.
Well, take him his tea.
[upbeat rock music]
Perfect.
[Plop groaning]
GUTBOY: Plop?
Oh!
We brought you your tea!
But it’s impossible!
Back from the grave?
Ooo!
Finally come for me!
GUTBOY: That's...
a downer.
[Plops moaning in fear]
- Let’s go to Besto’s - Let’s go to Besto’s
[zany upbeat music]
[Singing] Poppy, poppy, Pappy!
Please eat my pill!
You can play policeman if that eases how you feel.
but Pappy or policemen,
you have to help if first I still
I promised I can wed my lover, he will only yield.
I know he'll try to weasel that, I know
he’ll try and run!
And that slutty, skanky, skinless girl
wrongly gets all in the fun.
You have to help me stop them!
So that we can become one!
You could knock him out
or tie him up, or scare him with your gun!
but I need your help convincing him
[indiscernible]
and freshen up and clear your meaty head.
[indiscernible]
Oh that you inspire dread!
Oh, I sit out the quickest route to
[indiscernible]
[screaming]
Good lord.
I know that scream.
Kug will be awake soon, we better be quick.
Okay, but keep quiet.
- Shh! - Okay!
Jeez!
Uhhh...
[grunts]
Well, I'm out of ideas.
I know a secret way in!
How‘d you know that?
It’s from beautiful Sophia’s brain.
But how would Sophia know a secret entrance to Besto’s house?
It doesn't make any sense.
Gutboy!
Whoop!
Royal blue.
Whooaaa
SOPHIEGUTS: [whispering] Gutboy...
What-I wasn’t doing anything!
Great revenege idea!
Ooh, right!
Look...
Besto uses this huge hammer to crack his worker’s skulls for breakfast.
He eats brains.
Ech!
He should be asleep right now
in that huge fancy bed of his.
We can sneak into his bedroom,
raise that hammer and give him
a serious Bonk in the face.
Gutboy?
[Gutboy grunting]
That's a pretty good idea.
But I’ve got one that’s way better!
Let's drink all his wine!
Rhinocerai
and elephants
love to do...
the wine-o dance.
[Sophieguts laughing]
Woo!
Cuttlefish and swordfish too
do the wine-o bugaloo
[Sophieguts laughing]
Champagne is great with pretty girls
but dancing’s best with animals.
Woohoo!
Oh lordy!
How are we going to drink all this wine?
One bottle at a time.
Ha! No way!
That’ll take us a hundred years.
No it won’t.
Watch.
[gulping loudly]
Oh...
maybe not such a good idea.
[loud banging]
Oh man!
It’s Besto!
Quick! Hide the bottles!
I'm not going to hide the bottles!
I want him to see!
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
We gotta put-we gotta put all these bottles under this rug.
Ugh, what is this rug made out of?
Let’s show Besto.
I'm proud of what we did.
Besto!
You are a garbage man-
What-
Intruders.
One second.
GUTBOY: Oh my god, they’re huge.
Oh. Idea!
Intruders?
Where?
You.
You aren't Intruders?
What, us?
[laughs]
Who are you, then?
Why...
We're Besto’s wine disposal technicians..
Yeah, that!
Oh, our mistake.
Well, we'll let you get back to your work.
Wait! Um...
There's a way too much wine.
If we can’t get rid of it all,
Besto will chop us up.
He is such a mean, man.
But what's that got to do with us?
I'm hereby deputizing you two
to help us drink all of the wine in the cellar.
Oh, I don't know.
I've never drank wine before.
I'm not sure I could do it right.
That’s crazy!
Come here, I’ll show you!
Now,
this wine...
Drinking it, uh...
Is really easy,
Just, uh...
do...
like...
this.
[loud gulping]
[laughing]
Wha!
Hold on, hold on, there’s more, there’s more.
[grunts]
Now, you try.
Do like this?
SOPHIEGUTS: You got it!
[dramatic music]
Oh...
I think I like wine.
[laughing]
[laughing louder]
[lupbeat music]
[Singing] You think you’re looking so good.
And I'm thinking you're right.
’Cause when we’re together, I get bothered and hot!
I’m like a fire burning straight through the night!
You know I'm different with you
the pedal’s heavier when I drive
I feel you take me over and I lose control
and I finally feel like I am alive!
I can do anything!
’Cause you make me whole!
I can do anything!
It never takes a toll!
I can do anything!
I wanna lose, lose,
lose control!
I wanna mess with everybody, don’t care who I offend.
I wanna play hide-and-seek
and I wanna pretend
that I will always be this crazy
and this night will never end.
I wanna scream, scream, scream
’til the sun comes up.
I wanna sing, sing, sing
’til my lungs blow up.
I wanna squeeze you
tight and never let you go
I wanna lose control.
Oh, baby, can I complete?
I kept the secret so long.
Just when I thought I love you
everyday ‘til I die
Why you gotta go and prove me wrong?
It seems impossible
the way to touch my soul.
But it’s unstoppable!
Falling down your rabbit hole.
Am I an obstacle?
Oh will you let me lose control?
I wanna mess with everybody
don’t care who I offend.
I wanna play hide-and-seek
and I wanna pretend
That I will always feel this crazy
and this night will never end.
I wanna scream, scream, scream
’til the sun comes up.
I wanna sing, sing, sing
’til my lungs blow up.
I wanna squeeze you
tight and never let you go
I Wanna Lose Control.
Oh boy. What a crazy night.
Hey, Sophieguts
Wake up.
[groaning]
[mumbling] If he wants to marry my daughter, I’ll give him a daughter...
Gutboy!
Keep it down!
- Come here, you. - Woah, woah, wait, wait!
Wait, wait, wait!
Ow!
Oh.
That kind of helps.
You have to marry my daughter.
Called it.
I don't want to.
I don't know what you did to her
But she’s not the same.
She's become a much worse singer
for one.
I never touched your daughter!
Then, how do you explain...
this?
Uh...
conspiracy?
Yeah, conspiracy.
You stay out of this, you!
Oh!
What happened here?
Party.
Yeah, we were going to invite you
but you were asleep.
that's...
that's Joe's head bone!
You...
Need to go to prison!
Come on, Gutoy
we’re taking a ride on my new yacht.
I don’t really want to go to prison.
[Gutboy grunts]
Hold on!
Sophie!
Wait!
Take me too!
I cannibilized too!
But we're supposed to get revenge on him!
Hang on, Gutboy
I’ve got an idea!
GUTBOY: Okay, bye!
I hope you save me!
Woah, woah, woah!
[grunts]
Ah, man!
Now I’m in jail!
Hi there!
You stay away from me, you...
banana head!
Well I don’t know if the other one told you,
but I got quite a few of her powers!
Woah!
Now come here and admire me
before I break your spine!
I won't!
[laughs]
[laughing continues] [dramatic music]
Woah, woah, woah!
Uh oh.
You got...
my dress...
BLOODY!
[laughing continues] [dramatic music]
Stand over there!
To the left!
Stop slouching!
Now, ask me how my day was.
How was your day?
Awful! You ruined my dress!
[groans]
All right, you two.
It’s wedding time.
[bell chimes]
Dearly beloved,
we are...
gay-hered
here...
today...
GUTBOY: Sophieguts!
- Quiet! - Ow!
Dare-ley
bee-loved...
we are...
gat-turd...
her today...
to bend...
in...
holly...
M-matro-
mae-tro-mo...
We're on the deck!
You’re making this very hard.
Uh, I didn’t mean to.
All right!
because I'm ship captain...
I make you marry!
Now kiss!
[Gutboy gasps]
[epic music]
There they are!
Skingirl...
get off him!
Wha-what...
the Hell...
Hiyaa!
Gutboy!
[groaning, grunting]
You slimy little...
get off!
Don’t put me down!
What’s happening?
Ow!
Oh no, my hat!
[grunting in pain]
[screams]
[manic music]
Skingirl!
Come back here!
[laughs]
I raised the frogmen as much as you did, Sophieguts!
I will use their magic to revive my father as a god.
For the underwater paradise...
and then I’m coming back for you.
And him.
[evil laugh]
[splash]
Well how do you like that?
So...
I guess we own this yacht now.
Oh, yeah, that's pretty cool.
You think he has any fishing stuff on here?
Probably not.
He was pretty lame.
Haha, yeah.
Hey, I found my old fishing pole.
SOPHIEGUTS: Cool.
Can you teach me how to fish?
Sure.
GUTBOY: So, where do you want to go to?
I don't know.
Let's go on an adventure.
[rock music]
The ground below me shook as I tried to stand my ground
building the strength to face what was coming.
But I was caught in a vice.
that I could not escape...
I felt myself change
wondering what I was becoming.
the beast emerged from the wood
terrible and tall
his prerogative: killling everything he sees
his breath was heavy, his eyes were black
and he wore an evil frown.
as bad as he was, the beast was inside of me
When I was a young boy, I was the sweetest little guy.
I would help anyone who called my name
but on my 10th birthday, the dark side found me
and it changed me and I’d never be the same.
Now I am the Beast
and the Beast is me.
We are one in the same, standing in the far off scourge
And I look around at the scattered bodies
of friends and lovers lost.
Nothing can stop me, not even St. George.
KUBBLE: Ho ho, ho, ho, ho. Ho. Ho. Yeah. Give me a phone.
I’ll take a phone.
Kubble’s a land owner now!
My farm.
I’ll make the corn grow all right.
I earned this corn with every drop of dripping I had!
Kubble’s corn.
Oh...
Yep. Looking good.
Oh, Kubble’s looking pretty good now
ain’t she, boys?
Brekkek!
Coming mother.
Not corn again!
I’m afraid so.
Spit on it.
It's gross!
You're starting to look pretty tasty yourself.
You wouldn't want to eat...
me.
I'm hungry!
Ricketts.
Oh.
Huh.
Go on, get the husk and bones.
Momma’s gonna see herself a show.
Bones of corn and corns of feet...
feet of refuse are gross to eat.
Nasty spirits I entreat
Show me them girls who’s indiscreet
So, he takes me into the barn, right?
And it's like a freakin Zoo, there's cows and horses,
and pigs.
And here’s the weird part:
there’s goats on top of everything
they’re standing on the hay
they’re on the little farming machines
There’s goats ontop of the cows!
Oh crabs. They’re just talking.
Don't you women ever work?
Why are they on things like, they don't know about the ground?
So then he gets his eyeballs open, real wide, right?
and he says to me,
“ain’t only the goats that gots things they wanna be on top”
Gross.
Can you believe it?
Mmmm... meh.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
So I says to him, “Rudy
You're no goat, you're a pig.”
But that didn't stop him. He says, that's right, he's a pig and he
wants to go Hog Wild, he says.
The nerve!
After we, you know, take care of business and he's all
sprawled out on the hay there,drifting off. I say to him,
“Rudy. You can't sleep in the barn like an animal.
it’s disgusting.”
He says to me, it's his barn, he’ll sleep where he likes.
So I say, “Fine, Rudy, you want to sleep like an animal?
you can live like an animal.”
And I go out and I lock him in there!
Rudy may have been a louse
but he was a louse with a habit
and plenty of money.
Ah, he’s fine!
What we need is a girls’ night out.
Hey, hey, that's a great idea.
WHAT?
Girls’ night out??
What do you wanna do?
Without my Kubble??
We could go to Penelope's joint.
They've got a live band there.
Brekkek!
Go bring the girls here.
Think they can go out without me, do they?
We’ll show ‘em.
We’ll show ‘em real good time.
We're gonna serve those girls
their own kiddies in pies!
[laughs maniacally]
But... where are they?
In the pot, in the pot!
In the pot you go!
Get in the pot!
- Uh, h-how should... - There in the pot!
- Should I, uh... - Get in the pot!
Get in there!
[Brekkek screams]
KUBBLE: I don’t care-
just, just go.
[screams]
Oh the last time I had seafood, I...
What the f-
BREKKEK: Woah!
WOMEN: You gotta be...
That’s crazy!
Hey, who is that?
[Brekkek groans]
I understand that you ladies are
organizing a girls’ night out.
You got some questions to answer, bub.
Very well!
My name is Brekkek.
Sent by the gods of advertising to
take you to the best new supper club
in town!
Now if you'll just follow me.
WOMAN: What are you doing?
Hold on a minute, there.
How do we know you ain’t just some pervert?
I know how we can test him.
You said you was sent by
those advertising gods.
BREKKEK: Uh...
Ain’t they sending you with some kind of Insignia?
Certainly. I think I could...
give a demonstration.
All that magic is asking for what you want.
And if they want to give it, you're gonna get it.
Oh boy, are you gonna get it.
Uh...
Lords of advertising!
Uh, please grant us...
evidence...
of your...
presence...
and
Um, uh...
Prime selection of bargain prices!
[whacky music]
Call now to order the Gutboy collection on VHS!
That's 67 minutes of Gutboy entertainment on five
home video system tapes!
And as our free bonus gift to you,
we’ll send you the sixth tape, featuring the last five minutes of the movie
Absolutely free!
Remember,
if you haven't got Gutboy,
you haven't got the guts!
Call now!
[women screaming]
Please stop!
I really want to buy that Gutboy collection on VHS.
I always wanted to be a...
a star.
It killed Claudette!
Claudette is dead!
Well, I guess we can trust anyone
sent by the gods of advertising.
So where’s the best place to spend our girls night out?
[Kubble laughing maniacally]
These girls are in for a big surprise.
[laughing maniacally]
Takes love, takes love...
It's perfect.
Uh oh, here they come.
WOMAN: I don’t know...
This is kind of a weird looking club.
Is that Kubble?
What are you doing in this club?
Don't worry about it, ladies.
Uh...
Sit down
- Sit down here! - All right!
KUBBLE: Yeah, time to eat.
Come on. Come on. I don't got all day.
[munching]
[splatter sounds]
[Kubble laughing maniacally]
What’s the meaning here, Kubble?
It tastes like chicken, but it’s lighter.
[indiscernible
[Kubble laughing maniacally]
Joke's on you!
Never girls’ night out without Kubble!
You’ve been eating your own kiddies in pies!
That's the meat!
Blech!
Gross.
Kubble, this is frog meat.
These weren’t our children, they were yours.
[Kubble groaning loudly]
You’re all a bunch of child-eaters!
Now out! Out!
Out!
Get out of here, you child-eaters!
This is private property!
This is Kubble’s farm!
[Kubble laughing maniacally]
KUBBLE: Hey, what's wrong with you, ghosty?
Ghosty, not even alive.
You’re dead.
You wouldn't want to eat me?
I'm hungry!
“Don't eat me” my foot!
I ate you 15 minutes ago.
Ricketts, yeah, right.
[maniacal laughter]